Something similar just happened to me recently. Trust me when I say TELL YOUR WIFE.. She was more pissed I didn't tell her than she was about anything else..

Fred knows how to stop the stalker. He’s not interested in stopping the stalker. It will not end well.

LOL. Only because she found out. She wouldn't be angry at all otherwise.

Just stop it Not the case at all.

Then stop it. It’s in your power. You know how to do it. The Brain Trust is almost unanimous in telling you how to handle the situation. Yet you refuse to take the advice you asked for.

If you don’t stop it you are enabling it. What are you going to do? Stop it or cover up for it and ensure the stalking continues? You’ll keep covering it up until your wife finds out and she’ll blame you for letting it go on and not telling her. You’ll complain that you’re innocent and aren’t being treated fairly and you’ll sulk in a corner satisfied in the knowledge that you’re the real victim. Stop it now or stop complaining about it.

I've always thought you were hot, Fred.

LOL.

txt me

BTW, your wife already knows. They always do. Weird.

You're probably right . She has been extra nice the last 2 days.

Your wife and the friends wife bumped into each other one day not too long ago and decided to have lunch.

The subject of trust and fidelity came up and they both said their respective husbands were trustworthy.

So they decided to find out and agreed each would hit on the others husband and see what happens.

If you think that’s unrealistic you don’t know jack about woman.

Now that's funny. Unlikely, though not far-fetched.

You guys are great, which is why Fred is letting us discuss this.

Tell her, I say. If you want to protect the home front. This woman cannot cause you nearly the grief that you bedmate can. Look down the road six months.

YEs, far fetched, there is no precedent for that ;)

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Or........the friend's wife reports back that Fred told her "NOT INTERESTED" and then WITHDREW from any further contact.

You cannot improve on that.

Saying Fred should inform his wife - and that is above all the IDEAL scenario - is 100% wrong.

1. None of you know Fred's wife - thus - you DON'T know how she would react. Even though IN YOUR OPINION telling her is SYMBOLIC of trust.

2. When someone hits on a spouse, it is NOT a positive for the partner.

3. Why in the world, if it was not necessary, would anyone create something NEGATIVE - where it wasn't necessary?

4. The fact remains that women NEVER FORGET negatives. Fred would have to hear about this for the REST of his life!

5. This was nothing serious - not something that has brought any danger into Fred or his family's life - just someone flirting with Fred. I'm sure IF it had escalated - Fred would have taken further measures. At this point - Fred is handling things - on his own. He deserves that privilege and responsibility. You bring other people in - and you lose ALL control of the situation.

6. IF you READ Fred's posts - you would have realized all of this.

I'm not trying to offend anyone here - but maybe try taking your foot off the pedal for a minute and let some of this sink in.

I know everyone here has good intentions - but how about letting Fred decide how things should happen - instead of the brow beating? He obviously has better insights on all the personality details than we do.....I'm guessing....

Fred did not specifically ask for advice but he got it anyway. If Fred was concerned enough to post this topic then it is fair game that there are lots of responses. Fred can do what he wants with the input. He does not have to accept the advice but an informed decision I think can be better than sitting stewing about it and not getting any advice.

Nothing wrong with advice.

Some of the posts went a bit further, IMHO.

We all care about each other.

But let's not get carried away if our "advice" isn't taken.

If it wasn't for the internet many of us might be driving modern day Edsels and snaring stalking women.....:)

Do whatever you want to do. You will anyway.

But, if she is really bat***** crazy, anything can happen.
File a police report in case she comes back with an accusation of rape.
It also helps if the wife finds out.
You can then point to the proactive steps you have taken and claim you were trying
to spare her feelings.
Who knows, that might work.

A woman scorned can do things you would not even contemplate.

I like to do the cha cha

If being up front with ones spouse is introducing negativity then one or both have some work to do.

The situation is not one he created which means Fred is in control of nothing. Stalker is driving the narrative, he's only responding to it as it develops and evolves, that's not control.

No one is brow beating Fred.

He asked, we answered.

He can do with that whatever he chooses.