I hate weddings

[flatbutt]

First of all Friday night? Dinner not until 9 PM? And why why why bother gathering all these people together and blast the DJ so loudly that no one can hold a conversation? I hate weddings.

[sc_rufctr]

I love weddings as long as they're not mine.

[klm2500hd]

Loving or hating weddings varies based on two little words ----open bar

[Rick Lee]

My wedding was perfect - 19 people, open bar and no DJ - just lots of great conversation and laughter.

[WPOZZZ]

Drunk single women lamenting why they aren't the one getting married.

[PorscheGAL]

I love weddings: It should be celebrated when people decide to share their lives together.

The receptions: I could do without. The food is usually one step up from cafeteria food. Small talk with people I will never see again. And music no one over the age of 25 can dance to.

We eloped and told people after. Always thought we would renew our vows and have a dinner but we just celebrated 20 years of marriage and I would not share our day with anyone other than my husband. Marrying him was the best thing I ever did. I don't need a party to appreciate him or us.

[Zeke]

Originally Posted by klm2500hd

Loving or hating weddings varies based on two little words ----open bar

You got that right. Sometimes the food is pretty good. I'd hate for people to think that I didn't get them a good meal.

[slow&rusty]

Hate is a strong word

[Seahawk]

I worked a lot of weddings as a waiter and later as a bartender in college, at least a hundred. Great money and other benefits, btw...when I was a wedding bartender the amount of "referrals" were terrific.

The essentials in ranking of importance:

- Afternoon wedding and reception. Grandpa is not interested in staying up past 8pm.
- Immediate reception after the wedding. Nobody cares about the bride and groom after the wedding. Start the reception ASAP. Take the pictures before - there is no "seeing the dress curse" when over 50% of marriages end in divorce: Walk on the wild side. There is tradition and then there is stupidity. Pics before the wedding.
- Free open bar...it pays for itself.
- Live music or a really good DJ: The best weddings I worked had live music with a good front person...DJ's a distant second. Keep the music at a level below a sonic boom.
- Get to the speeches, planned **** as soon as possible. Grandpa can go home then.
- Buffet only, preferably finger food. More on food later.
- The venue. It matters. Doesn't have to be expensive, but it should be comfortable with views.
- Speeches. Less is so, so much more. Insist on it.

Things nobody but the bride and her mother care about in order of absurdity:

- The dress. The difference between a $20k gown and a $2k worth of satin and lace is indistinguishable to 99% of the people at the wedding. Do not care about the 1%. Spend that money on the essentials.

- Flowers. A friend of my wife owns a flower shop that does a ton of weddings. He owns a farm on the water. The bride and groom do not. Don't pay his mortgage. Nobody cares about the flowers except unhappy people who hate the bride and grooms families and want to complain about something. Let them be the "flower people". Spend flower money on the essentials. Focus.

- Food. The only people I ever heard in my many wedding events complain about the food were people who perhaps needed to skip a few meals. Buffet only, btw, if the fat cows are going to complain about the food (and they will) at least make them work for their chow. Spend the food money on essentials. Most of the people at the wedding eat at Outback Steak House for a big evening out. Never forget that.

- The venue. No destination weddings. You are not that special.

Those are the basics. All the best.

[pwd72s]

Originally Posted by PorscheGAL

I love weddings: It should be celebrated when people decide to share their lives together.

The receptions: I could do without. The food is usually one step up from cafeteria food. Small talk with people I will never see again. And music no one over the age of 25 can dance to.

We eloped and told people after. Always thought we would renew our vows and have a dinner but we just celebrated 20 years of marriage and I would not share our day with anyone other than my husband. Marrying him was the best thing I ever did. I don't need a party to appreciate him or us.

Kudos! I figure weddings beat funerals...which are sadly the more common with my age group.

June 27, 1975. Cindy & I, dressed in denim, said our vows to a civil commissioner of marriage in the courthouse of Reno, Nevada. Two of his employees for witnesses. We're still together.

There's a lot to be said for elopement. The ceremony itself means little. It's the life together afterwards that means everything.

[Tervuren]

For me the single worst part of the last wedding I was at was brought up by Seahawk.

Way too long from wedding ceremony to proper reception. Could have cut that by two hours.

I was the early to bed, early to rise type, and I also have to vote for arranging a timely point for those involved of similar bent to be done and get out.

Now I also have to say that the amount of hot single women attending can vary these dynamics. Here in my part of the Carolina's young women could lose 1/3rd of their weight and still have a healthy body fat percentage. Some could even lose 1/2. Add layers of make up and paint applied with a trowel and they just are not attractive to be around. Get me out of there.

[vash]

I like them. It usually means a family or friend is getting married. I focus on that, and bring my best attitude.

It’s a good day.

[VincentVega]

Originally Posted by Seahawk

I worked a lot of weddings as a waiter and later as a bartender in college, at least a hundred. Great money and other benefits, btw...when I was a wedding bartender the amount of "referrals" were terrific.

The essentials in ranking of importance:

- Afternoon wedding and reception. Grandpa is not interested in staying up past 8pm.
- Immediate reception after the wedding. Nobody cares about the bride and groom after the wedding. Start the reception ASAP. Take the pictures before - there is no "seeing the dress curse" when over 50% of marriages end in divorce: Walk on the wild side. There is tradition and then there is stupidity. Pics before the wedding.
- Free open bar...it pays for itself.
- Live music or a really good DJ: The best weddings I worked had live music with a good front person...DJ's a distant second. Keep the music at a level below a sonic boom.
- Get to the speeches, planned **** as soon as possible. Grandpa can go home then.
- Buffet only, preferably finger food. More on food later.
- The venue. It matters. Doesn't have to be expensive, but it should be comfortable with views.
- Speeches. Less is so, so much more. Insist on it.

Things nobody but the bride and her mother care about in order of absurdity:

- The dress. The difference between a $20k gown and a $2k worth of satin and lace is indistinguishable to 99% of the people at the wedding. Do not care about the 1%. Spend that money on the essentials.

- Flowers. A friend of my wife owns a flower shop that does a ton of weddings. He owns a farm on the water. The bride and groom do not. Don't pay his mortgage. Nobody cares about the flowers except unhappy people who hate the bride and grooms families and want to complain about something. Let them be the "flower people". Spend flower money on the essentials. Focus.

- Food. The only people I ever heard in my many wedding events complain about the food were people who perhaps needed to skip a few meals. Buffet only, btw, if the fat cows are going to complain about the food (and they will) at least make them work for their chow. Spend the food money on essentials. Most of the people at the wedding eat at Outback Steak House for a big evening out. Never forget that.

- The venue. No destination weddings. You are not that special.

Those are the basics. All the best.

good stuff

I'm with except for the food. No need to anything fancy but I've had some pretty bad food at weddings. But yeah, I could skip a few meals.

[Seahawk]

Originally Posted by vash

It’s a good day.

Me as well. Just because I know HOW it should go doesn't mean I don't enjoy the day

We are in the middle of a wedding zone/swath for friends and family, friends of my children (23 and 25) who's parent we know well, ex civilian and military co-workers, current business folks, Cali relatives, etc...18 in the last three years, more this year, dates to reserve in 2020.

I like to be parked in the back row, talk to the 2nd/3rd degree of separation folks. It is a hoot.

I do need to add, and I am Catholic, if the wedding is traditional Catholic, the long form, I'll see you at the reception.

YMMV

[flatbutt]

Originally Posted by Seahawk

The essentials in ranking of importance:

- Afternoon wedding and reception. Grandpa is not interested in staying up past 8pm.
--
Free open bar...it pays for itself.
- Live music or a really good DJ: The best weddings I worked had live music with a good front person...DJ's a distant second. Keep the music at a level below a sonic boom.
- Buffet only, preferably finger food. More on food later.
.

These are the things they did poorly Friday. As I said Friday night , the end of the week when you're tired and not starting till 6:30. We didn't eat till 9 PM. The DJ played so loudly that it actually hurt and the host didn't insist on it being lowered. I stuffed bits of wet napkin into my ears to dull the sound. I woke up this morning with a sore throat and still had a headache. It was not a good time.

[VincentVega]

I do need to add, and I am Catholic, if the wedding is traditional Catholic, the long form, I'll see you at the reception.

Funny. I went to one of those. I was a noob and didnt realize catholic wedding meant long and church, much different than the normal wedding. Oh well, I learned. Its something else to see family pitching a fit because the wedding isnt how they want it. No on wants to upset aunt whatshername.

Just have a drink and talk to some people, get in where you fit in.

[biosurfer1]

I'm not a big wedding fan but can usually find a decent time if I'm forced to go.

Worst ever was a wife's cousin who tried to have a 250 person wedding on a 50 person budget, and it really showed. Also, it drizzled and was cold and of course it was outside with no inside option.

It was so bad it was even comical in the moment.

[Captain Ahab Jr]

Best party I've ever been to was my wedding and the best thing I've ever done!

[Bill Douglas]

"Sir, do you take this woman as your lawful wedded wife for the next couple of years."

"Best Man, do you fancy the bride's maids, they're all yours."

Yeah, I've been to one or two miserable sod, low budget weddings too

[wdfifteen]

We were invited to a destination wedding in the Bahamas. Air fair and three nights at Sandals courtesy the bride’s parents.
Makes up for a lot of weddings like the OP.
I went to a friend’s wedding reception in about 1970 in a apartment in Chicago. Lots of music, adult beverages, and other substances. It was winter and the guests all threw their coats on the bed when they arrived. I woke up the next morning on the bed with the coats - and the bride and the groom.