Tell us about the Veteran who didn’t come home.

[RNajarian]

As we approach Memorial Day I thought we could be a little more proactive than just saying “Happy Memorial Day.”

Is there a person you knew who fought for our country that didn’t make it home? Tell us about him/her.



Brian A. was a 4N (enlisted nurse/medic) from the Kentucky ANG who served with me during OPERATION Iraqi Freedom. We were both assigned to the 486th Air Expeditionary Wing in Al Minhad United Arab Emirates. We had 21 assigned aircraft, a collection of C-130Es and C-130Hs.

Brian had brown eyes and sandy brown hair in compliance with AFI 36-2903 (Air Force Grooming standards.) He wasn’t very tall, 5”5’ 140 pounds, but he was physically fit. Brian could have easily been a model for recruiting purposes. Quiet by nature but gregarious none the less.

We had a flight doc assigned to our field hospital who despite being a gifted emergency room doctor, was a little absent minded and technology deficient. Brian took it upon himself to make sure Dr. Good (his real name- Call Sign “Feel Good”) was taken care of.

Brian made sure Doc Good had what he needed to care of the troops. For example, Doc Good had a special way of brewing coffee. The basket that held the coffee grounds would be filled to the top. The carafe would be filled with water and the brewing cycle started. Once the coffee was brewed, he would take the pot of freshly brewed coffee and put it in the reservoir to run another cycle. At that point Doc Good’s coffee was ready. In order to warn the rest of us about the coffee Brian made a sign called the “Doc Good Coffee Strength Meter” it went from Weak-Normal-Strong-Feelin’ Good He would move the needle to the appropriate coffee strength.

One day we needed to expand our facility so the Commander, Dr. Cinco, ordered the group to assemble several additional “Alaska Shelter” modules.

Photo for example purposes only. Not the 486th AEW (but it looked just like this)


Rank held no advantage during the assembly of these shelters, everyone was expected to pull his/her own weight. However, despite the expectations of Colonel Cinco, Brian had his own plan. Anytime he saw a provider “doing something he shouldn’t” Brian intervened and took the support beams from the doctor carrying them, or took over for the operating room nurse driving a stake into the ground. Brian was constantly distributing water bottles and even made sure Doc Good had his “Feelin’ Good Coffee”

Even though we were in a “dry” country, SOMEHOW alcohol found its way to our base. The advantage of flying C130 from the desert to Ramstein AFB in Germany. Everyone on base got two tickets a week, each ticket redeemable for one beer. For some reason, every week, the beer would always run out pretty quickly. Not surprisingly, every week, Brian would always be near the front of the beer line. Brian didn’t drink. Members of our security forces team usually missed “beer call” because they were on duty. Brian would keep his beer and solicit donations from others. He would then give these beers to members of the Security Forces team as they came off their 12 hour shift.

Fortunately, our hospital didn’t see the mass casualties that were expected. After 8 months the resources of the 486th AEW were reassigned forward. The war in Iraq continued for another 8 years. After most of us went home, I heard Brian volunteered for several additional deployments in the theater to “help out the docs.”

I could continue describing how amazing Brian was but I think you all understand how truly incredible he was.


In 2007 Brian committed suicide after returning home from a deployment.



My heart goes out to his family. Brian was a healer, patriot, friend and brother.

I think of him every day and know he made an incredible impact during his short time here on earth.

Rest in Peace Dear Brother, I know there is a absent minded doctor in heaven you are helping.



https://www.legacy.com/us/obituaries/louisville/name/bryan-ala-obituary?id=7810074

[E38Driver]

Awesome tribute to a true HERO. So sad that he could not win the battle with the demons within.

Dave

[Seahawk]

Thank you, RN.

While I have lost more than a few friends and acquaintances over the years, there are instances that remain with me because the services fumbled grace and caring.

In 2003/4, I was the Chief of Staff for a large command...I would get my command in late 2004.

I always personally greeted and checked in new military and civilian personnel when they were assigned to the command.

A 1st Class YN checked onboard in late 2003. She was assigned to us very quickly and I did not have any background on her. Her coming to us was a bit of a surprise.

She was not personally doing well on check in...she was great, just that there was a sense in my mind something was wrong.

I completely stepped in it trying to make her open up a bit: "Where are you from, how was the move, are you married, etc.?"

"My husband was a CH-46 Aircrewman and he was shot down in the first few days of the war...he is dead." She showed me his picture, in his 46.

She broke down. We blessedly had some really magnificent women on Staff, in particular a Filipino woman I am still friends with today.

Ermie heard and was on it. I cannot thank her enough. I am not uncomfortable with angst and pain, but there are people better equipped to handle it than me.

We all got her help and counseling: She was alone in Pax River and we fixed that in a few weeks.

I had been a "Detailer" at the Bureau of Naval Personnel in Millington, TN so I made some rather pointed phone calls to the enlisted YN detailer, then his 0-4 lead.

I was pissed and I wasn't stopping with them...I still knew a lot of folks there.

Completely unforgivable. Had I known in advance I would have prepared the welcoming in a manner appropriate to her sacrifice.

I got some push back from the YN detailer folks but I told them, get her orders near her family, in any DoD command, or I will pillage your village. They did.

Ermie helped her move, we were in comms with her new command every step of the way.

I think of her and her husband every Memorial Day because she got lost and that should never happen.

[flatbutt]

https://www.honorstates.org/index.php?id=308852

Vinnie Gabriel was just a neighborhood guy but he was one of those good ones.

His father, who was a Marine in World War II, died in 1957. Vinnie wanted nothing more but to follow in his father's footsteps, so he joined the US Marine Corps in September 1965. He attained the rank of Private First Class (PFC).
57 years and 5 days ago on May 21, 1967, he was mortally wounded in Quang Tri Province, Vietnam. He was taken aboard the hospital ship, USS Repose, but died the next day, May 22, 1967.
He received the Purple Heart, the Vietnam Service Medal, the Republic of Vietnam Campaign Medal, the National Defense Service Medal, the Good Conduct Medal, the Military Merit Medal, and the Rifle & Pistol Sharp Shooter Award.

I was too young to be his friend but I remember him.

[70SATMan]

There are several I served with on the E that didn’t make the return trip under the Golden Gate. I didn’t know them personally out of the 5500 or so that served at any one time but, I think about them often and not just around this time of year.

There was the F14 Pilot and RIO on my first trip out to sea after reporting aboard.
There was the young man that backed into the prop of a C2 on the flight deck working night ops.
There was the Plane Captain that went overboard inside a plane being backed into the starboard elevator during a storm in the Aleutian’s when the tow bar broke. He was not recovered, and this one bothers me the most. He knew he was fuched for several minutes till the pressure and cold took him.

There was the WO that went missing in that same Aleutian cruise. Never figured out if he jumped or if something nefarious happened. He turned up missing during a man overboard drill.
There was the Nuke that died from heat stroke during Reactor Drills in full Rad gear.
There was another EA6 pilot and EW crewman that were ejected into the water at launch when the plane lost an engine and started to invert. We actually ran over that plane. Two of the four survived.

Those are the few that stick out and I know that we lost a couple more during my 4 plus years aboard.

Wasn’t combat, wasn’t war time but, they volunteered to serve and paid the price for those of us lucky enough to come home to those waiting on the pier.

[Baz]

I was at the local tag office here Thursday to register a new motorcycle. While waiting to be called, I sat next to and struck up a convo with a nice lady who told me (when asked) she moved here in 1957.

After a bit more conversation about family, she told me she just lost her 44 year old son who was retired Army. He's buried at the Cape Canaveral National Cemetery in Mims.

He had broken his leg in Iraq, but I'm not sure if that was related to his death. She said he contracted some kind of virus and ultimately ended up at Shands in Gainesville waiting for a transplant when he went into a coma and then passed away. She still has another son who lives in town and is a fisherman. She said "He's a redneck!" which we both laughed at.

She was at the tag office to register a new trailer she will use for her pedal-kayak that she uses for fishing (so she can cast while still moving her kayak around).

What a cool lady! I gave her a hug and "God bless" on the way out.

I know this story doesn't exactly fit the thread theme but maybe has some value for others as it did for me.

Thanks for the thread, RN......and God bless to all who have lost someone they knew......

[creaturecat]

Great Uncle Percy. WW1
Battle of the Somme. ......
injured 3 times, in one week, then sent to the front of the line.
killed and buried there.

Canadian soldiers - fodder for the British Generals.

a picture tells (end of) the story:

[FPB111]

Sergeant Larry W. Maysey, Rescue Specialist, United States Air Force - Awarded posthumously for actions during the Vietnam War.

I never met Larry but my life intersected his.

He quit his job with a local mason and went to Vietnam.
A year or so later I took that job.
Around then He was shot down and listed MIA.
~1970 I was visiting a friend and mentioned that I was going to move to San Diego. His older sister asked if she could ride out with me. She wanted to visit a helicopter pilot in LA. (I still did not know who Larry was at the time)
On the drive out I found out that Larry was her fiancé and LA was his pilot when the chopper went down. I stayed in SD she went to LA. During her visit She found out Larry was thrown out as they went down and pilot was trapped and subsequently rescued.
They never found Larry so MIA.
Recently I heard reclassified to KIA? Do they do that after so many years or would remains have to be found?

35 or so years later I was in spinal cord rehab and one of the techs was Larry’s niece who told me that there was a statue for Larry in a little park front of the firehouse, on Main Street Chester.

I went down to that park and sat on a bench next to the statue this morning, Felt kind of weird.

[shadowjack1]

We were 18/19 years old kids. In my mind they are still that age. I remember the faces and the actions. I remember crying and the tears mixed with our sweat and our blood. But still young Men in my mind. 54 years makes a man forget a lot of things but not the faces or the feelings.
Something is in my eyes.

[Seahawk]

Originally Posted by shadowjack1

Something is in my eyes.

You are not the only one.

FPB111, thank you.

[gamin]

My friend and roomie Tom. Naval Academy grad. Wanted to be a dentist. Right seater on EA3B. Cold cat shot off the Roosevelt. Too slow to fly. Too fast to stop. Ship ran over them. Tom didn't experience combat or encounter an IED but he gave his life in the service of his country nonetheless. RIP Tom.
Yeah, something in the eyes.

[TimT]

This may or may not be appropriate..

My friend George who I met in 1975? was 1 of 18 children ..God bless Mrs McKen** she was pregnant for over 18 years..

George had an older brother who he never met...Was killed in Viet Nam... he had two other brothers that served.. I was struck when I learned this from George...

[Por_sha911]

My father-in-law fought in Europe during WWII.
He came back physically alive but my mother-in-law said the man she loved and married didn't come back. Back then PTSD wasn't understood. He left as a happy go lucky fun loving guy and came back an alcoholic with memories that stayed with him until he died.

[wdfifteen]

Originally Posted by RNajarian

Is there a person you knew who fought for our country that didn’t make it home? Tell us about him/her.

A guy I went to high school with was killed in Viet Nam in 1970. We weren't close friends.

My grandfather came home, but died from lung damage - gassed in WWI. My uncle died in WWII both died before I was even alive.

The worst thing for our family was that my dad got malaria in the South Pacific in WWII and the long, high fever damaged his brain. For years he would get excruciating headaches. Sometimes we would come home from school and Mom would tell us "Dad has a headache," and we knew not to make a sound until bedtime. He eventually got better, but it took a big chunk out of our family togetherness.

[thingmon]

Good on both you and the OP.

I think of her and her husband every Memorial Day because she got lost and that should never happen.[/QUOTE]

[DavidI]

Wow! There have been some incredible warriors described in this thread. I salute and honor all of them!

Paul, you were the type of Commanding Officer that all of us would follow.

Semper Fi sir, David

[Seahawk]

^^^ Thank you. The best part of my time in the military were the people I served with.

My Great Uncles were Chiefs in the Navy prior to WWII and served on small ships during the war as Chiefs. They were the best. They were funny, smart and not hesitant to give me a BUNCH of advice when I was commissioned: A sailor can spot a phony walking up the quay.

"Do not be that person and always, always pay attention to your folks". That is the PG version.

They were, to me, great men and I tried to live up to their expectations because they were the real deal, OEM.

A couple of old Navy Chiefs, at their brothers grandson's commissioning: May not matter to many, it mattered to me.

[RNajarian]

Originally Posted by DavidI

Wow! There have been some incredible warriors described in this thread. I salute and honor all of them!

Paul, you were the type of Commanding Officer that all of us would follow.

Semper Fi sir, David

I second This sentiment David, but would add “ . . . into battle.”

[gsxrken]

My sister dated a fine young Army aviator Clayton Carpenter (160th SOAR… if you know, you know). After several OIF deployments, he lost his life stateside in a training flight due to a missing cotter pin on the tail rotor. He was credited for putting down the helo in a manner that saved his crewmates.

To that point, peacetime and/or training deaths on CONUS are their own special twist on Hell. Family is sitting there grateful their son is not deployed and they still get the knock on the door. Unfathomable. And it’s often something stupidly avoidable. Every year for the 4 years my son was at West Point, a cadet died for one reason or another. Whenever there was a communications blackout the whole community braced for impact. Each time, after the parents had been notified and officials released the names, I felt guilty for the relief that washed over me when it wasn’t my son. They were all our sons.

[azkid]

1LT. William Racca On the wall