You're holding the wrong end?

You need to start using one of these......:D

https://m.media-amazon.com/images/I/...AC_SL1500_.jpg

Let me get this straight.

People in N.C. have had their entire town wiped out and there is no clean water, electricity, or roads usable to get out. The middle east is on the brink of starting WWIII.

You are crying over a twisted tape measure?
First
World
Problem
:rolleyes:

You try to build a fence on your only day off (wait wut?) with a tape measure like this and not get mad…

Haha, Billy. The last fence I built I'd go to the timber supply place. Bring my tape measure so NO mistakes. Measure the timber and put the tape measure down. Get back home. WHERE IS THE TAPE MEASURE. I'd go back buy another tape measure, same again 24 hours later duh.

A lady walks into the hardware store and asks for some bolts...the kid helping her inquires, "how long?" She makes a bracket with her thumb and index finger and says, "about 8 inches?"

He replies, "lady, you've been lied to." :)

I worked in an old-time hardware store as a kid, along with another smart assed high-school student.

A lady came in and asked for some 'ten inch spikes', my co-worker went to the back side of the bins to check, he's completely hidden from view, then suddenly he yells out 'ma'am I can't give you ten inches, but I can give you eight'.

I can give her 12 but it would have to be in installments.

Get it? Installments. (Beavis/Butthead laugh).