Total Recall
 

A midget, a bodybuilder and a porn star walk into a bar.

The bartender looks up and says, "What is this, an election?"

***

Gary Coleman said that if he's elected governor of California, he's going to
build condos for "homeless little people."

Everything will be scaled down to their size. Kitchen cabinets lower, sinks, toilets, etc., lower. And the tenants will not have to pay any rent.

They'll be known as Gary Coleman's Stay Free Mini-Pads.

b'dumph-ching http://www.pelicanparts.com/support/smileys/drummer.gif


:D

This one is funnier

How 'bout Dan Burton (majority legislative leader)'s zinger:

"His 100 day plan? He's not going to be able to find the bathroom in 100 days!"

The best nickname I've seen so far is "Der Gropenfuhrer"

"Who are you?"

"I'm your governor!"

"Well I didn't vote for you"

"You don't vote for governors"

"So how'd you become governor then?"

"The recall vote held aloft Excalibur signifying by divine right that I, Arnold, should be governor of the Californians. That is why I am your governor."

"Listen. Strange recalls distributing swords is no basis for a system of government! Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not some farcical recall ceremony...."

"Be quiet!"

"Well, but you can't expect to wield supreme executive power just because some star-struck rubes threw a sword at you..."

"Shut up!"

"I mean, if I was to say I was a Governor, just because some moistened bint lobbed a scimitar at me, they'd put me away!"

"Shut up! I ordar yow to shud up."

"Help, help, I'm being disenfranchised"

"Blardy peasant! Harsta la veesta!"

"some moistened bint" - LOL