If I had it all to do over again........
 

I am impressed by the knowledge and worldliness of many in here so I'll ask. Having seen what you've seen, done what you've done; what would you do different, what would you do the same? At what age do you think it's too late to matter?

I'll leave it vague on purpose.

Your first sentence: Surely you jest..This group knowledgable and worldly?

As for me, I wouldn't change too much; it has been an amazing adventure. And I never think it is too late to matter.

No I wasn't kidding. There are more than a couple guys in here with whom I'm impressed. I'll save the bootlicking, but I wish I had such a diverse group to crack beers with on Saturday nights.

If I could change anything, I would have done it all younger...but then again, it wouldn't have been the same. Got to admit, I've had a good ride!

I'd have started saving and investing earlier in life...

I tell myself that what I'm doing *today* is important. At 30 I would look back and wish I'd done this or that when I was 20. When I hit 40 I would look back and wish I'd done that or this. Finally I've gotten to the point that I don't want to turn 50 and look back at today and say, "I wish I'd done xxx."

That's why I track my car. That's why I still play music. That's why I still surf. That's why I'm following my heart for awhile instead of my head.

As for things I regret? Not speaking up for myself early and often in relationships. And wish that I'd learned to say "no" a long time ago. Still working on that one...

I wish I'd double majored in music instead of switching. I wish I'd stuck to my guns and risked failure in the business instead of taking the "safe" route.

Another interesting question is what things *don't* you regret? Oddly enough, I don't regret my "lost years", even though they were totally f*cked up. They helped to make me who I am (whoever that is).

I wish I hadn't been such an unruly kid in high school. I wish I hadn't done drugs and had gotten kicked out of the 11th grade only to get a GED and, later, a HS equivalency diploma just to get into the USAF. I wish I had gone to college right away instead of taking classes here and there and eventually graduating at the ripe old age of 36.

If I had not done all of the things above, I never would have met and married my wife. I never would have had my son. I would not be as well prepared to raise an intelligent, thoughful and independent teen. I have street smarts that few who've gone to college immediately after HS possess. Those skills have served me well in business. I would have missed out on all of those trying yet invaluable and thoroughly enjoyable life experiences.

So I guess I wouldn't do anything over and I have no regrets.

At only 30 (I know I'm young logically, but it sure don't feel that way) I wish I had believed the cliches more. You know study hard, save money, avoid credit, etc.... I wish I had taken one of my scholorships, I wish I had more faith in myself when I was younger, blah blah blah.
I have a great wife and an amazing baby(the truly important things) so I have little to ***** about, but hindsight is a mother. I imagine we'd be better off without it.

I too took the easy road which turned out to be anything BUT easy:) Irony hates me.

Hell, even the Navy Nuc program mightof been cool? Maybe I don't appreciate my current position as much as I should? Hmm this could go on and on but that's the jist.

For the record, a bottle of Pinot Grigio leads to run on posts....just a warning.

never would have started smoking so I never would have had to quit and think about those darned things every freakin day for 19 years ah! ah! ah! ah!

Other than that - life is very charming and full of daily blessings! Wife, Kids, Family, Friends, Job, House, even Car - pretty freakin great

I was going to say "nothing," but there are some things I did not handle perfectly. Two that come to mind the quickest is the cigarette smoking, and not spending enough time with my children. Totally failed the first one. We have a very good relationship and have always had, and I did spend some time with her when she was younger, but not nearly enough. She needed me and I needed her, and it did not happen.

That's probably the advice I'd most like to share. Drop the tools (including the telephone) and hang with the child.

Smoking is a good one. Bottom line it never to start.

I wish I had invested in Real Estate early than I did. Other than that I'm pretty happy.

"Just one word: Plastics!"

:)

I bought the 77 as a way to connect with my Boy and maybe even my Girl - they love that car and over the next 15+ years I (we) will look forward to spending time tearing it down, building it up and who knows, maybe even racing or rallying her?

I wish I would have invested heavily in this little local software business back in '86 or so...you know the one...the evil empire...;)

i wish i would have found better use for school then 6 fresh audiences a day. you guys have seen my spelling,, right?

i think what chris says above about street smarts (that and microsoft spell check) has gone along way in masking my lack of higher education. my intelligence is there, its just that i never applied myself in school. so that i guess.

that and i wish i had not hurt the girlfriends that i did not realize i cared about till it was too late. can someone give me a hug?? tabs?

More pistachios. I don't know that I would have necessarily done anything differently, but everything I did would have involved more pistachios. Salted & undyed.

More Cowbell !!!!!!

:D :D

Studied a lot harder in High School and College. Returned to College at the age of 28 and got 2 additional degrees in 18 months, along with restoring an antique airplane, building a color TV set (heathkit) and getting my EMT license... it was a busy time but not many ways to get in trouble there so we worked.

You work a lot harder as you get older as you realize that its no longer a game and your future depends on it. Also as you get older you realize that "forever" may not be that far away...

Joe A

At 37 I've seen really high highs and been really deep down, like no place to live and couldn't buy food for a week. Would I change any of it? No way. The experiences are exhillarating and really center you. I'll never look back on my life (as if I'm ever going to die... ha!) and say, "my that was nice and comfortable."

One regret: let Elisa K. get away.

If there's one thing I have learned is that you have total control, on a moment to moment basis, of where you go in life. But forget carpe diem, it's really about being self-aware enough to pull together disparate opportunities into a singular grand vision and then be able to execute.

letting that "one" get away is a time tested torture we all must live with. Sometimes, that memory of her is somewhat sweeter than her, don't forget why she is no longer in your life - that is - unless she is an 18yr chick from Demark, who could bogart a j, argue socialism, gobble a knob ALL AT THE SAME TIME and still smell like she showered when she is 3+ days ripe - ah...good times...

http://img223.imageshack.us/img223/7...selhoffrj8.gif

This is a test............

Done differently? This may sound harsh but I would have taken less crap from my old man and laid some serious hurt on him when he effed up my family. I really regret that I was too young and innocent to recognize his BS at the time and pull out the woop-ass when he deserved it. In the end the bastard got away with everything and suffered no ill consequences. There is no justice.

Aside from that I really feel like I did the best I could under the circumstances. Life is good. And given where I started, that fact never ceases to amaze me.

JanusCole - seems like many do get away scott free leaving behind a waste land of suffering and agony - yet from the torment can grow a stronger man able and willing to truely care and concede his selfish wishes and inadequacies to become better than that. Both my folks came from incredablly horrible childhoods - both were determined to rise above the ruins. They couldn't have done it with out eachother. I think you have done the same...

That which doesn't kill us makes us stronger? Then again, a well placed fist into a well desserving jaw can do wonders for a good nights sleep.

Very good question lendaddy. I try to make our home a place of joy and comfort for my wife and kids. I think it is important to have our home a place with lots of laughter. I want the kids to look back with fond memories and joy, not regret. I don't want to be an old man saying I wish I had not taken life so seriously. Our house is a home of love, laughter and discipline.

For most of my adult life, I was really depressed that I never finished college. Had the oppurtnity to go when my parents paid my way but wound up flunking out. In the 20 years that followed, I spent most of my time hating myself. However, during that same 20 years, I got married to my great wife and had two boys whom I love dearly. Those three people are the lights of my life.

I guess I finally realised my family and not my career was the most important thing. If I had to flunk college and endure deep depression to have my wife and kids, I guess I wouldn't do anything different!

ive only been on this planet for 22 years, so I dont think Ive wanted to change anything yet.

I am happy that I went through high school and graduated college with a 3.2GPA. I stuck to the books (although i was kinda nerdy and was always the kid that got picked on). A lot of my friends do drugs or smoke a lot of weed, but I never nag them on what they do..its their life...so I stay out of it. Most people my age dont listen to you anyway.

The only things I can say I wished I could change would be not being such a dam sheltered kid (I get that wide eyed look about 'you didnt see that movie? or 'you didnt hear what happened to such and such?') and that I didnt get abused by the girls (I didnt know much and got suckered too many times)

You could say Im one of those kids that has mad girl friends but not a 'girlfriend'.

I regret everything. I'm ten pounds of angst in a five pound bag.

Woodpie, I hear you.