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Dear Mr. Cramer,

Thank you for your clear and concise information.

You are indeed a well learned and highly intelligent man.

I take my hat off to you for your sharp incisefullness and retort at the subject matter that was placed on this board for your kind attention.

I would however say that a few words which will get you through the next year or so, again I would advise you to learn this and repeat at as many functions as you can

"God save our gracious queen,
God save our noble queen
God Save the queen"

SmileWavy SmileWavy

Adrian Jaye
Her Majesty's prison service,
Wormwood scrubs
Cell block 4
bunk D

University of "life booze and hot chicks"

Quote:

Originally posted by john_cramer
Dear Mr Jaye

Over the centuries this sort of thing has been attempted a number of times.

One recalls your unfortunate lack of political success in our original War for Independence, lack of military success in the War of 1812, and your backing of, and commerce with, the losing side during our Civil War of 1861-1865.

Attempts at commercial hegemony have similarly been ill-fated. Your brief penetration of our market by both Morris Garages and Jaguar was untimely cut short by one of your component suppliers, Lucas. The resulting lackluster performance of the British auto industry has unfortunately resulted in the control of most of your marques by foreign companies, BMW and Ford coming immediately to mind. How ironic that your own managers were able to accomplish what the Wehrmacht could not.

On the cultural front, you had a good thing going with the Beatles and The Rolling Stones. Unfortunately, The Spice Girls were unable to carry the torch. Sic Transit Gloria.

So, while amusing, your post does little to convince me that you are anything more than a paper tiger when it comes to attempts to reimpose the yoke of British tyranny on our fair Columbia.

I would add in closing that your more overt efforts to impose Ingsoc in the United States, most notably, The Guardian's "Clark County Project," likely contributed to a Republican victory. Hoist yourselves with your own petard, no?SmileWavy SmileWavy

Respectfully submitted,

J. Frederick Cramer, Esq.
St. Catherine's College, Oxford, 1990-1991

TO quote a line from Jimi

"Hey Joe!"

twiglets are only to be released on the main land.
But we will be shipping pork scratchings and lard sandwiches

Pi$$ed... also from the cockney slang, "being a bit brahms and Liszt", intoxicated, pi$$ed as a fart, 10 sheets to the wind. I think this also derives from the fact of the need for frequent urination after drinking lots of beer !

Wank1ing, you guy's call it the same thing, dont you ;)
imagine a gourgeous 944, one beautifull ride, bling alloys, kicking sound system. you get a woody in your shorts and well... the rest..... you dont want any diagrams do you ???? do you ???

:p :p ;) :)

Quote:

Originally posted by Joeaksa
Adrian,

Thats a good start, and totally agree with the Budvar beer. Its the best on the Continent and wish it was sold here. Will you please resume shipments of the Twiglets and Lemon Curd as soon as possible?!

Can you please explain being "pissed" to us once again as well as something about "wanking" that just is not clear to us older guys... :)

JoeA

Chris,

Whats wrong with fish and chips out of a newspaper???!!! One of my fondest memories are of real fish and chips this way, with a nice pint of beer!

Wish Punch magazine was still around... :(

Joe

hey were not bashing you, just think of all the things you guys gave us

1> macdonalds
2> Marylin monroe
3> The 928 ;)
4> Elvis
5> MTV
6> YO MTV RAPS
7> Friends
8> Russ Meyer
9> Playboy
10> pelican Parts ;)

If those are the contributions we've made as seen by the rest of the world-I'll be really depressed:). Ok-Elvis and Pelican, but those are almost totally offset by McDonalds and Friends.

The only thing good about England is the beer. I think Hitler really only wanted the brewerys. We should have let him have them.

Can I have one of the Falkland Islands?

Quote:

Originally posted by adrian jaye
hey were not bashing you, just think of all the things you guys gave us

1> macdonalds
2> Marylin monroe
3> The 928 ;)
4> Elvis
5> MTV
6> YO MTV RAPS
7> Friends
8> Russ Meyer
9> Playboy
10> pelican Parts ;)

And you gave the world "BOVRIL". That has to be some of the most vile stuff ever put in a jar. I do not know _how_ my mother eats that stuff. :p

Adrian,

We can actually get Twiglets here in the states, and lemon curd is available at some of the better grocery stores.

I became addicted to some of the Brit stuff while doing some work in Europe with some Para's. Those boys know how to eat, drink and play! (not to mention jumping out of planes!) The NAAFI kept me poor for a long time :)

JoeA

Quote:

Originally posted by Isabo
The part that would be dearest to my heart is spelling.
As an American citizen who went to school in England I have a particular problem of being laughed at for my correct English spelling by my American friends and relatives:D

At least you were taught spelling...in the USA's government schools these days, the common theory seems to be that spelling would stifle creativity. :rolleyes:

Paul,

Not only do they not teach spelling (among other things) but they also seem to have stopped teaching driving instruction in schools these days! Whats with all these jerks pulling immediately to the left (passing) lane and driving slow???!!! Wish the cops would pull a few of them over for tickets...

Joe A

Quote:

Can I have one of the Falkland Islands?

What would YOU do with one of the Falkland Islands?

Quote:

Originally posted by john_cramer
What would YOU do with one of the Falkland Islands?

one big Porsche track day ???

:)

Have you guys ever been to the Falklands? Its a God awful place, in the middle of no-where and dog crap weather much of the time. Why anyone would want the place I cannot understand.

Now why Brando bought an island in Tahiti... that I can understand! :)

JoeA