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rcecale 11-11-2005 12:11 PM

US Marines Called Upon For Paris Deployment...
 
Thursday, November 10, 2005 6:21 PM
President Bush May Send Up To 5 Marines For French Assistance

11/10/2005 - Shelby Trial



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------



President Bush has authorized the Joint Chiefs to begin drawing up a battle plan to pull France's ass out of the fire again. Facing an apparent overwhelming force of up to 400 pissed off teenagers Mr. Bush doubts France's ability to hold off the little pissants. "Hell, if the last two world wars are any indication, I would expect France to surrender any day now," said Bush.

Joint Chiefs head, Gen. Peter Pace, warned the President that it might be necessary to send up to 5 Marines to get things under control. The general admitted that 5 Marines may be overkill but he wanted to get this thing under control within 24 hours of arriving on scene. He stated he was having a hard time finding even one Marine to help those ungrateful bastards out for a third time but thought that he could persuade a few Women Marines to do the job before they went on pregnancy leave.

President Bush asked Gen. Pace to get our Marines out of there as soon as possible after order was restored. He also reminded Gen. Pace to make sure the Marines did not take soap, razors, or deodorant with them. The least they stand out the better.

In an unrelated matter, President Bush told reporters that he was considering a "Flu for Oil" Program to ease our country's energy problem and prevent the upcoming pandemic. Nobody had a clue as to what the hell he was talking about.


Randy

gaijindabe 11-11-2005 12:17 PM

.http://www.pelicanparts.com/support/.../gaapslaap.gif

dd74 11-11-2005 12:23 PM

Randy - will you be here all week? And what's the drink minimum? :D

rcecale 11-11-2005 12:25 PM

This just in....

At the end of the night a Marine leaves a bar.

Outside he sees a nun. He walks over to her and slaps her in the face. Then he punches her in the stomach and knocks her over.

He proceeds to kick her several times and when he's done he bends down to her and says, "Not as tough as a Marine, are you Batman?"


Randy

singpilot 11-11-2005 12:25 PM

The French Terrorists took today off. It is, after all, a French Holiday.

The celebration of the end of WW1. France lost that one too.

Mulhollanddose 11-11-2005 12:26 PM

http://cagle.msnbc.com/working/051109/allie.gif

coloradoporsche 11-11-2005 12:30 PM

France lost WWI?

I guess our schools really are failing.

VINMAN 11-11-2005 12:30 PM

Will the French wave the white flags out of habit,when the Marines land?

singpilot 11-11-2005 12:33 PM

Well, you are right.

The PC version is that the French were overrun, occupied, and liberated by the Allies.

Ok, they didn't 'lose'. It only felt that way.

Jeff Higgins 11-11-2005 12:38 PM

I bet these five Marines aren't asked to use rubber bullets either.

gaijindabe 11-11-2005 12:43 PM

Vietnam, Algeria, WWII, The Franco-Prussian War, Waterloo, Trafalger, Napoleon in Russia, French & Indian War. Tough neighborhood.

turbocarrera 11-11-2005 12:47 PM

France sent 5000 soldiers to Afghanistan to assist the US Military - the nerve..

Dan Mc Intyre 11-11-2005 01:00 PM

Ya know Randy, that's about three more than necessary.

Dan

Dixie 11-11-2005 02:23 PM

[quote]France sent 5000 soldiers to Afghanistan to assist the US Military - the nerve..[/qupote]

Didn't France recall the troops almost immediately? Can anyone clarify?

Hugh R 11-11-2005 03:39 PM

Yeah Randy, that's overkill. I think three women Marines would do the job more than adequately.

andrew15 11-11-2005 04:00 PM

Ha Ha Ha - It funny because the French are smelly and surrender lots !!!1!1!!!

LOL!!! They were overrun and slaughtered by a superior German force that was rampaging through Europe - not just France!!! FUNNY STUFF!!!

Lets all laugh about it on the very day that most of the western world honours the war dead - Rememberance Day / Veterans Day ->THATS FUNNY TOO !!!

You guys are pretty much morons in my book.


I guess you all forget small things like this:

http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2002/09/26/world/main523331.shtml

But, I guess that doesn't quite fit in with the increasing intolerance of a country that doesn't blindy follow you into a war....

AM

Joe Bob 11-11-2005 04:34 PM

[QUOTE]Originally posted by Capt. Carrera
Quote:

France sent 5000 soldiers to Afghanistan to assist the US Military - the nerve..[/qupote]

Didn't France recall the troops almost immediately? Can anyone clarify?
Cooks and hookers.....

The food was spoiled and the hookers smelled just as bad....

Jeff Higgins 11-11-2005 04:40 PM

Must be tough to be a French Canadian.

singpilot 11-11-2005 04:43 PM

and 15 years old to boot.

Flatbutt1 11-11-2005 05:03 PM

thats nice andrew, and yes it was nice of the French to walk our kids home. remember though, there was no fighting for the French, they did not need to fight their way in or out, but still it was nice of them to come and get them.

buh-bye

andrew15 11-11-2005 05:51 PM

Not French Canadian (I'm in the West actually)
Not 15 (wish I was again)
Just a guy who thinks the joke is old and in particularily bad taste on Rememberance / Veterans Day.

AM

Edit for crappy spelling

Joe Bob 11-11-2005 05:52 PM

Sorry, eh....hug a vet.

cowtown 11-11-2005 06:13 PM

On days I don't want to be offended, I don't log on to PPOT. ;)

andrew15 11-11-2005 06:42 PM

Don't get me wrong - I like to be offended or be offensive a good percentage of my day!

I still stand by the thought that anyone who stands in uniform for his country deserves respect - no matter what the nationality.

Trust me - the Canadians helped the French as well - we just don't hold it over their heads like you guys ;)

AM

fintstone 11-11-2005 07:43 PM

Ther difference is...the French have done their best to hamper the US and the US military ever since. Apparently the Canadian military is not exactly on the French radar.

Christien 11-11-2005 07:51 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Mulhollanddose
http://cagle.msnbc.com/working/051109/allie.gif
Am I the only one who noticed the wonderful, yet most likely unintended, irony in this?

andrew15 11-11-2005 08:02 PM

We're not on the radar because we adopted that crazy new camo back in '98!

AM

Christien 11-11-2005 08:02 PM

Oh yeah, and I have to agree somewhat with Andrew. The joke's old, and war jokes are in particularly bad taste today.

And what's with the whole issue of French people smelling bad? I spent 2 weeks in France this summer, and didn't notice any particular stench worse than anywhere around here. Man, have you ever been to Buffalo? :)

fintstone 11-11-2005 08:10 PM

Funny I never see you guys posting to defend the US or our military which are attacked regularly here.

I guess the French considered the US friendship of little value when siding against the US with Libya in the 80's and Saddam more recently. Apparently the blood money they received under the "oil for food" program was worth more than US and Iraqi lives to them.

andrew15 11-11-2005 08:25 PM

Umm - Were US companies not implicated in the 'oil for food' program as well? And yes, I'm sure there are a few Cdn firms were as well. With more than 2,000 companies abusing the program, there is more than enough blame to go around!

As far as arms dealing, I'm sure there are more 'most favoured trading parter' Chinese AK's than any French munitions out there.

With the US, Russia, China, UK and France being the major suppliers of arms worldwide, you've got to expect them to face off against each other in almost any conflict.

In terms of US troops, like I said before, you've got to respect someone who wears the uniform for their country - regardless of nationality (or in this case politics). Very rarely do I see US troops themselves 'attacked' here - more often it's the case for war itself that's attacked.

Yes, it's possible to respect the troops and not the reason for the participation in a conflict.

AM

fintstone 11-11-2005 08:35 PM

From a caller to the Neal Boortz show:

AP and UPI reported today that the French government announced that it has raised its terror alert level from "Run" to "Hide." The only two higher levels in France are "Collaborate" and "Surrender". The raise was precipitated by a recent fire which destroyed France's white flag factory, thereby disabling its military.

Joe Bob 11-11-2005 08:37 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Christien
Am I the only one who noticed the wonderful, yet most likely unintended, irony in this?
Consider who posted it.

ChrisBennet 11-11-2005 08:50 PM

I'm probably going to regret posting anything political in OT but...
Do the French ever point out that the the US wouldn't even be a country if they hadn't come to our aid during the Revolutionary War?
-Chris

andrew15 11-11-2005 09:03 PM

Fintstone-

The French military isn't really all that bad.

Sure, they surrendered quickly in WW2, but then went on to form a highly organised, effective resistance effort that pestered and poked at the Germans until the end of the war.

Not that I like it, but it seems like the same situation in Iraq - Quick capitulation, followed by a lengthy period of poking, prodding and general instability. Maybe you hate the French because the Iraqi insurgents are taking a page from a 60yr old playbook and still working your superior stength forces?

Is that offensive enough to hang out on OT? ;)

AM

fintstone 11-11-2005 09:09 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by ChrisBennet
I'm probably going to regret posting anything political in OT but...
Do the French ever point out that the the US wouldn't even be a country if they hadn't come to our aid during the Revolutionary War?
-Chris

Big deal! The Soviet/Chinese were on our side when they were getting their respective rears nailed by Germany/Japan. That did not keep them from being bastards during the Cold War. As far as France in our own Revolutionary War....we were only the enemy of their enemy (England).

fintstone 11-11-2005 09:16 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by andrew15
Fintstone-

The French military isn't really all that bad.

Sure, they surrendered quickly in WW2, but then went on to form a highly organised, effective resistance effort that pestered and poked at the Germans until the end of the war.

Not that I like it, but it seems like the same situation in Iraq - Quick capitulation, followed by a lengthy period of poking, prodding and general instability. Maybe you hate the French because the Iraqi insurgents are taking a page from a 60yr old playbook and still working your superior stength forces?

Is that offensive enough to hang out on OT? ;)

AM

I imagine that you have just slammed the French far worse than I by comparing the heroic French Underground (not the military) to terrorists that intentionally murder their own women and children. I see no similarity. Too bad the current spineless French did not learn anything from that very small segment of their population in WW2.

The French have made no secret of the animosity toward the US for the last 30 years or more. They are only reaping what they have sown.

As far as the "oil for food" scandal, the French let it effect their vote in the UN Security Council. That makes it far worse than random companies profiting.

yellowline 11-11-2005 09:18 PM

The French helped out of necessity, only to weaken England and strengthen their own weakening New World empire. Louis XVI wouldn't support revolution, especially considering the fragile state of pre-Revolution France.

Napoleon sold Louisiana to us because he was cash-strapped. And so forth... The French's record of alliance with us pales in comparison to that of Britain post-War of 1812.

Getting technical, we didn't have to fight Germany, we only declared on Japan for their attack on Pearl Harbor.

fintstone 11-11-2005 09:25 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by yellowline
...
Getting technical, we didn't have to fight Germany, we only declared on Japan for their attack on Pearl Harbor.

Sure we did...the whining (in French) was deafening....and so many white flags were made that the world's supply of cotton was in jeopardy.


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