Fun with a 419 scammer.
 

I got an email the other day from what is clearly a 419 scammer - rather than delete, I decided to have some fun with him.

Mr. Frank Torres wrote:
> Hello,
> I am Mr. Frank Torres, one of the Funds Managers of Fidelity Investment International. The World Largest Funds Management Company with over $4.2Trillion Capital Investment Funds.
>
> Nevertheless, as Fidelity Funds Manager, I handle some of our Investor's Direct Capital Funds and privately extract 1.2% Excess Maximum Return Capital Profit
> (EMRCP) per annum on each of the Investor's Magellan Capital Funds. As an expert, I have made over GBP52M (Fifty-Two million British Pounds sterling). From the Investor's EMRCP and hereby looking for someone to trust who will stand in as an Investor to receive the funds as Annual Investment Proceeds from Fidelity Magellan Capital Funds.
> All confirmable documents to back up the claims will be made available to you prior to your acceptance.Meanwhile, I have worked out the strategies and technicalities whereby the funds can be claimed in any of our 6 Clearing Houses without any hitches.Our sharing ratio will be 40-60 should incase you are interested, Please email me immediately for more details.
>
> Sincerely,
>
> Mr. Frank Torres

I wrote back:

Hello Mr. Torres.

My name is Dr. John Dorian - my friends call me J.D. I am a OB\GYN here at wonderful Sacred Heart Hospital. It is an enjoyable place to work. I work closely with three of my colleagues, Dr. Elliot Reed, Dr. Perry Cox, and my black surgeon friend Dr. Chris Turk. My Immediate superior Dr. Robert Kelso, Chief of Medicine here at sacred heart is rather unpleasant to work for, but at least he is not physically abusive like that dreaded Janitor is.

Please send me further details of this plan. I have a dire need for funds at this time. As a doctor, I am currently involved in a project with unwed mothers. I am personally involved with helping them get their start. Proudly, I have assisted over 50 young women become unwed mothers. Needless to say my monthly expenses are quite high.

Do you have many women in England who want to become unwed mothers? I would be happy to help them too.

Also, do you know how to get rid of annoying janitors?

I hope to hear from you soon.

Cheers!

Dr. John Dorian.


We'll see what happens - I hope he responds.

I assume that your nickname is "Long John?"

Hope you get a reply. A very good friend of mine (retired) spends his day screwing with these 419 asswipes.

Back in grad school, at the beginning of the Nigerian email scam, I got a Nigerian email with a yahoo return address. A few of us got together and tried to log into his account using permutations of his user name. We finally hit on it and got in. It was unbelievable how many people believed this guy, and responded ready to send money.

We send emails to everybody in his inbox and then signed up his email address up on a bunch of porn sites.

are you still banging Elliot?