Why can't you understand "No!" means "NO!"

dd74 · 12-12-2007, 06:10 PM

I'm sick to death of people coming to my house, ringing my doorbell, and asking for handouts or membership to one or the other affiliation. I don't care what damned organization it is they represent - the homeless shelter, the NAACP, the Catholic church, the Free the Ferrets cause - I don't care. I want no more menacing souls sauntering up to spew a spiel that at day's end, I'm too exhausted to even comprehend. Tonight, a "brother" came by, dressed in USC regalia, saying he was trying to work his way up the ladder of reform or some-such stuff. I didn't even listen. I only said "No." Well, "no" meant nothing to this guy. He came back again with the same diatribe. I mean...COME ON! I get spam through email and snail mail, I get it on the phone during dinner. Now this crap, especially now because it's XMAS. Ah! Pray that no Watchtower folk show up here. I might be in a throat-cutting mood.

To rectify this, sure, I'd get a "No Solicitors" sign, but the solicitors would ignore it (for various reasons such as: 1) "I didn't see the sign;" 2) "I don't know how to read;" 3) I don't know how to read English."

I'd get a big dog with a big bark. However, big dogs with big barks usually have big teeth, and thus ensues the lawsuit when big dog is protecting angry little homeowner.

Maybe I should get a big twelve-gauge pump which I'd chamber only for the sound effects. Yet, again, I foresee all sorts of legal haranguing occurring because of this action on my part.

I don't know the remedy, just the cause, which is my disgust and anger with these people.

OK, I'm done. Thank you for your attention.

mikester · 06:55 PM

I'm digging a moat.

Joeaksa · 12-12-2007, 06:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mikester

I'm digging a mote.

Its a "moat"...

maxnine11 · maxnine11's Garage

you don't need real dogs; just the sound of rabid pit bulls blasting on your stereo when you open the door a few inches to tell the perp he has a five seconds to leave before you release the hounds.

legion · 12-12-2007, 06:41 PM

The NRA sticker right above the "No Solicitors" sign has worked quite well for me.

afterburn 549 · 12-12-2007, 06:46 PM

Hmm stop and think about it b4 you go Total ballistic . If that's the your worse case scenario you have had a pretty good day ! Some people in some parts of the world have nothing to call home, now where to call home ..wish they had your problem............................

Paul K · Paul K's Garage

I always thought there would be a market for a doorbell that, when pressed, plays the sound of a pump-action shotgun being cycled, hounds barking/growling, and heavy footsteps approaching the door. You could put this on a CD and hide speakers outside- stereo effect- then film the uninvited 'guests' running for their lives.

Sound good?

Cheers,

Paul.

masraum · 12-12-2007, 07:04 PM

Answer the door buck naked. I suspect that'll cut down on a lot of your issues.

masraum · 12-12-2007, 07:08 PM

Just hope it doesn't end up like this.

http://my.break.com/content/view.aspx?ContentID=197284

speedracing944 · speedracing944's Garage

I vote for the naked approach with a 12 gauge pump in one hand and a dog on your other side.

all i get out by me are the Watchtower folks.

Speedy

TerryH · TerryH's Garage

Quote:

Originally Posted by Joeaksa

Its a "moat"...

If you dig it twice is it re-mote?

I too have little patience for the door to door stuff. We can get on the "do not call list", where is the "do not knock" list?

Jeff Alton · 12-12-2007, 08:26 PM

If I saw them on the street, I would answer the door in just my underwear....

Cheers

cab83_750 · 12-12-2007, 08:49 PM

DD74,

What part of L.A. are you in? I have been in the Conejo Valley since 1987 and I have had no more than 6 visitors. To the best of my recollection, 1 from "Hi, I sell candies for my school...."; 1 from "Hi, I sell meat..."; the last 4 are from "Seventh Day Adventist".

I have not been solicited for 'membership.'

As Wayne said, "Just say, 'I am sorry, I am busy.'" And sloooowwwwly shut the door.

dd74 · 12-12-2007, 08:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by afterburn 549

Hmm stop and think about it b4 you go Total ballistic . If that's the your worse case scenario you have had a pretty good day ! Some people in some parts of the world have nothing to call home, now where to call home ..wish they had your problem............................

Oh, please!

To quote an old holiday pandering victim's standard: "I gave at the office."

cab83_750 · 12-12-2007, 09:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by afterburn 549

..... Some people in some parts of the world have nothing to call home, now where to call home ..wish they had your problem............................

Peter, a native of Australia (aborigine), saw his friend John (another aborigine) walking down the street smiling and laughing. He also noted that John was carrying a sheet of corrugated metal on his back. Peter said, "Hey John, wazz up? How come you are so happy?"

John said, "My divorce is final. And the beauty of it is that I get to keep our house."

Hugh R · 12-12-2007, 09:34 PM

And people wonder why gated communities are the rage. I live in one with 25 homes and I've had two uninvited solicitors in 10 years.

mikester · 12-12-2007, 09:50 PM

We see the occasional JW but more often than not it's a Morman. We were lighting the first candles of Hanukkah last week in our dining room which is pretty much right next to our front door. Our front door is mostly window so you can see right into our dining room if you're standing at it. It was plain that we were quite busy but the a$$hat still rang the doorbell to talk to us about....the environment. My wife closed the door in his face without saying anything. Had it been me...

Well...it was at least one of the most disrespectful things I have had happen to me.

Gogar · 12-12-2007, 10:38 PM

Just answer the door.

Don't say a word.
Stand there.
Stand there some more.
Don't answer a question.
Don't make a sound.
Stand.
Wait.
Quiet.
Maybe a blank stare.
Dead quiet. Questions? no. Words? no. Just silence and a blank stare into space.

It will take less than a minute and will give you total control of your doorstep, and maybe a laugh.

dd74 · 12-12-2007, 10:47 PM

Well, standing and staring might work. The problem is this guy came to the door, then came back while I was out picking up take out, confronting me in my driveway.

Think he wanted my lukewarm Baja Fresh burrito? Nah...

Think, maybe, he was casing my house? Sure, why not?

Think I'm thinking of locking and loading tonight in case a third visit is in store? One never knows.

911Rob · 911Rob's Garage

Quote:

Originally Posted by Paul K

I always thought there would be a market for a doorbell that, when pressed, plays the sound of a pump-action shotgun being cycled, hounds barking/growling, and heavy footsteps approaching the door. You could put this on a CD and hide speakers outside- stereo effect- then film the uninvited 'guests' running for their lives.

Sound good?

Cheers,

Paul.

That is funny Paul!!!!!!!!!! LOL