Dispassionate.....Me?

[Moneyguy1]

That is an interesting observation!!

There are things about which I do tend to stay outside the emotional side of discussions, only because getting emotional about subjects like politics, global climate change, religion, etc leads nowhere. However, that being said, there are things in some of the "points of view" that do bug me. Intellectual laziness and intellectual dishonesty top the list. When an individual, in the first case (laziness) simply will not follow up on information that is out there and free for the taking but sticks to a preconceived notion. In the second case (dishonesty), the individual knows better but still adheres to a point of view that he knows is wrong but is too self absorbed to admit it. In the first case, the individual dismisses any other source, or says "I do not understand", or "Please clarify". In the second case, it amplifies into derivisive and sometimes abusive rhetoric because there is no other defense.

What I am passionate about is interpersonal relations. I believe in honesty and openess and yes, trust. I believe that the vast majority of people are good. One has to prove themselve othewise before I will write them off. I believe in the right for one to choose a belief system and be left alone to live it, providing that their belief system does not hurt others. I do not believe in "Political Correctness", and that concept lessens us all and makes us more, not less, divided. I believe that there are those who need help that those of us with much can provide; those who are in the situation they are in through no fault of their own. But, I also do not believe in a free ride for everyone. The problem is separating the two. I believe that nothing is impossible; that the Universe is too vast and too complex to rule out anything. That leaves me with an approach that everything is a wonder and should be appreciated for its part in creation. I believe that most of us set the bar far too low on what we can accomplish, thereby limiting the good we can do for ourselves and others.

I believe that love, music and the arts are man's most noble achievements.

In other words, I do not sweat the small stuff and in the end, it's all small stuff.

I do what I can.

[Hugh R]

I'd like to agree with you, but in my experience the three basic human emotions are greed, fear and greed.

[DARISC]

Originally Posted by Moneyguy1

I believe that love, music and the arts are man's most noble achievements.

In other words, I do not sweat the small stuff and in the end, it's all small stuff.

I do what I can.

I do agree with you. Well put.

David

[Moneyguy1]

That must make life difficult at times.

I mean that with no sarcasm at all.

Yes, there is fear.....fear of the unknown, fear of feeling helpless, and others that I can't think of right at the moment. As to greed; yes, there is greed...but in my relatively long lifetime I have met as many "givers" as "takers". And I find the "givers" to be far more content with their lot in life, and a lot more fun to be around!!

The best to you in this season blessed with more good will than any othe time of year.

[Hugh R]

Maybe its just my perspective at the moment. In the next few weeks, I'll probably be taking in my 80 y/o mother in law, one of her daughters (meaning one of my sister in laws) as basically strip mined this womens life savings to fund her personal life style. Everyone in the family knows this and they just ignore it. I'll be doing this because none of the other brothers and sisters of this lady want to do jack ***** for her. Its that or put her in a Medicaid home which are holes that hold people who are waiting to die. Oh, and the great brothers and sisters are howling because my wife and I would take over her $900/month social security check. Like they should get it? I'm 53 with one kid out of the house and the second off to college, and I WANT to take in an 80 y/o lady? Yeah, I hate to say it, greed, fear and greed. I guess I left apathy out.

[Moneyguy1]

Hugh

I had a similar experience in 1993-94 with a 85 Y.O. mother who had lost a lot of $$$ through the activities of a "trusted relative". It was not easy, but I figured she had nurtured me for years and now it was my turn. My first wife (who died of an aneurism) was bipolar for years. I married "for better or for worse" years earlier. I had had the better (years of love) and it was my turn to put up with the "worse". My second wife took 3+ weeks to die after a doctor induced injury earlier this year. Yet, I remain optomistic about life.

No situation lasts forever. Just keep that in mind!!

[Hugh R]

Bob,

Don't get me wrong, I'll do this for Donna's mom, and I'm OK with it. I just find the lack of support by her other kids to be sickening. I don't want or need anything that she owns, but her other kids No. 1 concern is what will happen to her stuff, and what little money that hasn't gone missing yet.

[Moneyguy1]

You are up to the task. Doing the right thing has rewards that neither you or I can fathom until they come along!!

[Christien]

Originally Posted by Moneyguy1

I believe that love, music and the arts are man's most noble achievements.

My vote for quote of the year!

[Chocaholic]

Originally Posted by Moneyguy1

You are up to the task. Doing the right thing has rewards that neither you or I can fathom until they come along!!

I don't know man...I think this should win for quote of the year!

[fintstone]

Originally Posted by Moneyguy1

.. In the first case, the individual dismisses any other source, or says "I do not understand", or "Please clarify". In the second case, it amplifies into derivisive and sometimes abusive rhetoric because there is no other defense...

Did it ever occur to you that your post...or the one you refer to was simply so general or inane that the person wanted clarification to actually understand what you were trying to argue? For example, simply saying that Bush sucks or Bush lies may be very incisive to some...but leaves little specific information for others to discuss/argue.

[Shaun @ Tru6]

Bob, it was a compliment. After carefully searching for the right word, I used this definition:

1. Free from passion; not warped, prejudiced, swerved, or carried away by passion or feeling; judicial; calm; composed. "Wise and dispassionate men." Clarendon.

2. Not dictated by passion; not proceeding from temper or bias; impartial; as, dispassionate proceedings; a dispassionate view.

[DARISC]

Originally Posted by Hugh R

Bob,

Don't get me wrong, I'll do this for Donna's mom, and I'm OK with it. I just find the lack of support by her other kids to be sickening. I don't want or need anything that she owns, but her other kids No. 1 concern is what will happen to her stuff, and what little money that hasn't gone missing yet.

Hugh,

It's Christmas Eve. You are doing the right thing and it's apparent that your choice comes from your heart. Whatever your faith, if any, Christ is generally recognized as a great teacher and, if you accept that, and if there is such a place as heaven in your belief system, he's smiling down on you with approval. Forgive the miscreants that inhabit your scenario, let it go, and I'll wager his smile will broaden.

Whatever, you'll be a happier man and you deserve that. What you're getting into is tough, but the satisfaction, if you don't allow the negatives to overwhelm the positives, will be sweeter than you can possibly imagine at this moment in time.

Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukah (sp?), Happy Turkey Dinner - whatever applies.

David

[Hugh R]

Thanks David, and its XMAS, btw. My previous discussions with you pertained mainly to those who don't help themselves or their friends and family, but expect the proverbial "someone" to help.

[SLO-BOB]

Originally Posted by Hugh R

Maybe its just my perspective at the moment. In the next few weeks, I'll probably be taking in my 80 y/o mother in law.

I truly pity you. You might as well get the plaque - No Good Dee Goes Unpunished engraved and place it over your front door. You will become the instant bad guy to everyone in the family who lives outside your household. No wonder you cite greed and fear as the only two emotions. I know because I've been there. Bottom line - you have to do what is right. The only silver lining is you'll save a ton next year on Christmas gifts.

Sorry for the cynacism. It's a bad deal that has left a very bitter taste.

[DARISC]

Originally Posted by Hugh R

Thanks David, and its XMAS, btw. My previous discussions with you pertained mainly to those who don't help themselves or their friends and family, but expect the proverbial "someone" to help.

Understood. But ya gotta admit, it behooves us all to deal with those problem people to somehow straighten them out - or they'll continue to ruin their own lives and, in the process, ruin things for those of us who make our way through life through our own hard efforts.

Again,

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

[frogger]

I have a passion for ambivalence, except when it bores me.

[Moneyguy1]

Shaun:

And that is the way I took it; as a compliment. I was just having a little fun with what I am and am not passionate about. In the meantime, I think we found someone here wound tighter than a $3.00 pocketwatch!!

That alone is worth it!!

MErry Christmas!!

(What are we doing here at 9:00 on Christmas Eve?)

[Shaun @ Tru6]

Originally Posted by Moneyguy1

(What are we doing here at 9:00 on Christmas Eve?)

We are among good friends Bob.

Merry Christmas!

S

[Moneyguy1]

Good answer!!

Ya gotta love this place!!