dammit , my time came, went, and 200 secs later, a huge chunk fell off
i thought i had a chance, but the key's still on the remaining chunk

got another time set, but that's another 3.5 hours, i doubt it'll last that long
can't sleep, i'll be suffering tomorrow

Awesome contest! There are too many variables to have a firm calculation. Your friend doesn't know jack...

But really how long before that squirrel gets out of the ice to get the nut?

My guess is 5,356,800 seconds.