what's he going to do when he grows up?
 

At the parent-teacher conference for my 5th grade son, it was evident that some of his work quality was...umm...sub-optimal. As part of his re-education, I have been having him write a page every night on the topic of my choice. He's been working on a fantasy piece about a kingdom that runs out of silver, but the other day I said he needed to write about learning the piano (he's taking lessons). Here's what he cranked out. Genetics holds true...

-----

When learning how to play the piano you should know this. The alphabet on the piano goes up to "G". Strange, huh? Also, never slump. It is bad for your back. Remember: no bamboo poles. Second, don't stare at the picture on the wall. Not that picture, the one to the left. No, my left you stupid.

No hot dogs either. So your dog in the summer heat has to go home where it's cool. Don't try to outwit your piano teacher. So the dictionary and the "How to Outwit Your Piano Teacher" book have to go. No dirty hands either. That means that your dirt sprayer has to go.

You need to be properly clothed too. So put your pants on. And your shirt on. And your hat on. Listen to the teacher. So the ear plugs and magazine have to go too. No throwing temper tantrums, so the "How to Throw a Temper Tantrum" book has to go. There! You look much better! Now go and hit learning piano in the bull's eye.

Zen and the art of piano playing.
Jim

I think he's "channeling" a young Hunter S. Thompson.

No the kid is just smarter than the old man....well at least more creative.

Damn, Todd. A paternity test in paragraph form. The apple didn't fall far from the tree.

you forgot better looking

Well.. that's a given..

That was awesome!



KT

that is hilarious! you must be a proud papa.

Now, that s**t's funny :D

Nice creativity! :)

FYI, my son was in need of "re-education" when he hit 5th grade. I turned the parental involvement up to 11, and by 6th grade, he was close to running on autopilot for the rest of his school years. You're doing a great job, Todd!

when talking to little people of this caliber, you really have to watch yourself.
NO DNA test needed..

Rika

I'd say he's bored. That is a very creative and intelligent bit of writing for a 5th grader.

That is quite clever stuff. How old is fifth grade?

I can empathize. That kind of boredom for me didn't kick in until 6th or 7th grade and lasted most of the way through high school. I managed to pull out by my own bootstraps without "parental re-education" my senior year of high school.

Let me preface my next statement with this: your son is obviously bright and talented. I wouldn't suggest what I'm going to suggest unless this was not true. I'd imagine that he is also pretty well-adjusted.

I'm going to suggest something unorthodox. Let the kid fail for a while. Let him marinade in it. Let him simmer in it. Let it go for maybe a year.

Yes, his teacher will have a fit. You will hear about "lost potential" and such. He may even fall behind a little.

But what your son may end up with may be something that very few kids are allowed to have anymore: an appreciation for failure. Avoiding the feeling of failure may well provide him with a lifetime of self-motivation.

Of course Todd, you are the parent and your decisions are final. I just thought I'd throw my crazy ideas into the mix.

You got your 5th grader to write a page on the topic of your choice? That;'s pretty impressive. I'd ease off the worrying about school work. He's clearly going to be ok despite the damage done to him by the educational system.

GONZO piano lessons.:D

Your kid made my day, Todd! That was good.

*steps onto soapbox*
I know I shouldn't throw my 2 cents out here, but I'm going to anyway. Bad decision making skills I suppose. Anyway. The title of the thread got me thinking a bit, and I was reminded of a conversation I had the other day. Whatever you do, Todd, don't badger the kid about what he wants to be when he grows up, or about how is he ever going to make money doing <activity>. He doesn't sound like an idiot, and you seem overall to be a rather intelligent guy. He'll find a way to make money, or make a living, doing <blah> if he really enjoys it. All you'll serve to do by working him over about it is to ruin his creative potential, destroy the possibility for original thought fueled by passion (and aptitude!). This has all sorts of effects later in life, and (believe me) none are pleasurable.

I know it's my uneducated, never-been-there opinion, but torturing kids (of any age) about what they are going to do when they grow up, or how they'll ever make a living doing it, is one of the WORST thing you can for them.

*steps off soapbox*

Two nephews about that age in a small town school. They track the kids into three groups:

A. work for the village, town, county or state. (90% of decent jobs in the area.)

B. to move away and get a job in a cube processing insurance claims or some such.

Or C. future dropouts who will make a living cutting firewood or get some kind of public assistance.

No other options or possiblities exisit. The whole educational process is predicated on these three tracks.. It really is awful.

In this one sense much rebellion and anger I do.
Be wary, anger leads to the dark side. Learn to control your feelings young Skywalker.
http://forums.pelicanparts.com/uploa...1209133743.jpg

Exactly my thought. I'd like to be the first to welcome him to PPOT.SmileWavy

rest assured that I'm not from the pushy parent school. Being raised by a perfectionist school teacher mom, I have serious issues with the "p" word (potential). This extra work isn't because he isn't living up to his "potential", but rather because his lit circle notebook was absolute crap. As in illegible half sentences and totally undone work. Legion, he's had plenty of "failure" over the past few years. One problem is that he is totally charming (so much for genetics), and all his teachers love him so they cut him an incredible amount of slack. That is good and bad...

I don't push him into team sports at all (he tried t-ball and softball and didn't like them), but he is being "forced" to take piano lessons but that is typical. He actually has a very mellow teacher, is learning different styles and is already writing his own music. He loves it, but loves to complain. I seem to recall that same sentiment...

So the title is mostly rhetorical. I really don't care what he does when he grows up as long as he's happy and is creating. He's likely not going to be content to be a 9-5'er, and my joke has always been that he'll be a great politician or master criminal (like there is any difference). If he wants to postpone college and go on the road with a band, I'll be all for it as long as he's got his sht together. The only dad influence will be that the time to take risks is when you're young with no responsibilities. So pick something you love and chase it.

and as an aside, we routinely argue with the school that they give *too much* boring/rote homework. "Teaching to the test" is resulting in beating all the creative juices out of kids, often by the time they're done with elementary school. So both his mom and I push back pretty hard against the school. But the work that he *does* do has to show sincere effort. There are issues of learning discipline, work ethic, and follow-through that are essential no matter what he wants to do for a living.

As for how to get him to write? Well, no screen time until it is done. He loves playing computer games, so that is a great carrot to induce desirable outcomes. And thankfully he loves to read. I've watched him finish a 300 page book in a single day. I certainly can't do that any more...

I applaud you, Todd. Seems like not many parents know WTF to do with their kids these days, but you definitely have your stuff together.

Teaching to the test IS beating the creativity out of kids. I think that's actually been somewhat known for awhile. Cauchy, the great mathematician, showed wonderful promise as a young boy, and a friend of the family urged the father to keep young Cauchy away from formal mathematical instruction, lest it destroy his intuition and creativity.

How's this for teaching to the test? A girl in my Multi-Variable Calculus class got a 90 something on the exam. She asks me, 2 classes later, if I could explain what a Line Integral is. Funny, that's what the TEST was over. She got a 90, I got a Bad Grade, and here she didn't even comprehend that material. WTF?

I wish my parents (and teachers, and guidance counselors...) would have been more like, Todd. I do have to give some credit, though, as my parents never told me what they think I should because they didn't want to influence me. The public school system and the onslaught on "what do you want to do to make money" questions did enough damage, though....

I'll give your thread back now. Synopsis: Todd is the man:)

hell, I'm just trying to help him avoid *and* make some of the same mistakes I made as a kid. I sometimes feel like I have no clue on parenting, and it is a constant struggle. I'm a selfish b@stard and like to do my own thing. Thankfully kids are pretty patient and flexible and tolerant of parents who stumble around. I am in awe of kids as they really do *get* the world. I have a lot to learn...

As long as you're interested and involved in his life, he'll do well.

Why spend time with your kids when you could be making money to buy a new flat screen TV?

you can sell the kids to cover the tv, so that really isn't an issue.

Is that all they're worth? Damn, how many for a 993 TT?

Wal-Mart can ship him to Tailand to process/package shrimp for sale in its US stores. Everybody wins!

Sounds like you are doing a great job walking the fine line Todd.

Don't kids depreciate pretty quick?

I mean a white newborn might get you $100,000, but at 5 that kid is only good for sewing together tennis shoes, and is only worth $1,000 or so.

You held for too long Todd. Now you're just going to have to ride the market out! SmileWavy

just like my retirement account.

hey wait a minute...he *is* my retirement account. I better be nice to him...

You've got all the success the world has to offer Todd.
Thanks for posting!
That was spot on.

I did miserabley in school. Didn't even graduate high school. Now I run my own business, and have a worldwide reputation.

I find the creative, atristic types usually don't do well in school.

My advice? Give him a guitar and see what he does with it. :D

He's off to middle school next year and they have school orchestra. My ex asked him if he was insterested and if so what instrument and he said, "violin." *cringe* She thankfully said, "how about string bass, with violin as a backup?" I'm going to suggest trombone, but this weekend we'll be off to music shops to poke around. There are guitars around the house, as well as electric basses. If he wants to play upright I'll likely get one for me too and try to lead by example (although I don't want him to feel like he's competing with me - that part can be tricky).

My reasoning is that bass players can always get gigs. Violin is...um....evil. I'd rather he did cello or even viola. Trumpet players are usually uptight and the 'bone players more laid back. I also love oboe and bassoon but all double reed players eventually go insane from trying to put air through such a small opening :p

If he likes violin, let him play violin. He'll be tweaked if you push him into something else. When he sees what others play, it'll possibly lead him to make adjustments to what he wants to play the following year. My BTDT 2 pesos.

If he *really* wants to play violin then fine. But he often goes off on whims so a little course correction isn't out of the question. Depends on what he gets excited about at the music store. Then the reality of actually practicing...

That was a great read. :D

Many years ago, during a particularly tough semester at uni, a good friend of mine advised me: