gotta hit "bottom". That varies for each person. Never did rehab - got myself sorted. Not fun or pretty. The depression is a kicker, as that could be fueling the drinking. I'd say see a psych and a regular doc (especially if you haven't had a physical in a few years). AA can work as well. You don't have to stop drinking to go to an AA meeting...you just have to go. It isn't for everyone, but it might be for you. Don't know unless you try.

AA sounds like an excellent place to start. Talk to your doc. He'll be in the best position to direct you. But be brutally honest with him or he can't give you the right advice.

Edit: noticing increasing tolerance is one of the classic signs of alcoholism.

If you are thinking of controlling your drinking, your drinking is already out of control. Find a friend that is in AA and go with him/ her to a meeting. I'm sure you will see yourself in the crowd somewhere.

+1000

Easier to set foot inside the room if you're there with someone you know. You don't have to say anything or even meet anyone...just listen.

"sit down, shut up, and listen"

don't get all hung up on the higher power stuff. Your higher power is your choice. It could be anyone or thing. Admitting you are really powerless when it comes to booze, is the biggest decision. After that it's easy. take the first step and the rest will follow.

You are your own higher power, Gassy. Man the fvk up and stop drinking.

(Hey, you asked us to say it!)

I think depressed, broke, and drinking is a place everyone knows something about. The thing is, if you get rid of the drinking FIRST, the other two often go away.

But, I guess if you really feel you cannot go one day without a drink, then you should seek help. I'll root for ya, man. :)

Whatever people think about AA, (lots of opinions on another recent thread), I'd say that the best thing about it is that there are lots of people there trying to not drink. There is a power in groups doing anything as opposed to doing it alone that is undeniable, IMO.

Thanks guys. I've looked in to AA meetings today and I think I'll go to one--even if alone. We'll see how my appt tomorrow goes and what she suggests.
c

There is an AA mtg going on pretty much every second of every day somewhere in the world. And if you don't like the first one, try a second one. Different groups can have different vibes. Remember that they are comprised of farked-up humans. Just like me and you ;)

I agree. Just go. You never know who you'll meet and how it will change your life. My brother met his fourth (and hopefully final) wife there, and has been sober for seven years. All it took was one trip to the AA at the local YMCA.

Do you drink alone, or in social settings? I'm guessing alone, like after work to "unwind". Does it interfere with other things you might like to do, like your daughter's ball game you mentioned? Do you actually look forward to drinking, and plan your after work schedule around drinking? Do you feel like maybe your loved ones shouldn't know how much you really drink? These are all indications of a problem, gassy.

There is no "manning the fuch up" on this one. Some of the toughest guys I know have fallen to this one. Don't feel "defeated" or ashamed to seek help. Real men know when they are in trouble and could use a hand. It sounds like you are that far along, at least. Just take the next step. Lots of these guys are giving you great advice on how to make that next step. There are lots of options. Pick one, see if it "fits"; stick with it if it does, look elsewhere if it doesn't. And go hug that daughter of yours...

Yes, I'd say I'm in a bit of a spot right now. The first step was to make the appt.--the second was to tell a bunch of strangers on the internet about it. Thanks guys--I'll post after my appt. if not before. Thanks for the support so far. So it goes.
c

It up to YOU to make the change. I am in the same boat. I have a lot of BS going on in my life and it eats a hole in me. I have a great life, I have a beautiful wife that loves me and we carry on like we are newlyweds, 2 awesome kids, although the 4 year old can get to your last nerve.

Good job, great friends and I work to live and I have fun.

Thats not the problem, its the slowing economy, a lawsuit, a lawyer beating me to death with bills, having to sell off assets (911, vacation home) and some family issues (not immediate bother and parent issues) that get to me.

A-hole clients do it too. Stress from the absolute chaos at work each day.... it goes on and on..

There are days, many, by 3 in the afternoon I cannot wait to get home and get that 1st drink in me, then the second, if its beers, a 6 pack later, wine a bottle later, then I am where I want to be comfortably numb.


When I drink like that I do not sleep well at all. I wake at 1, 3 and 5 in the morning stressed out over mostly nothing. Its most likely the alcohol wearing off.

I promised myself last week I would cut back and exercise, I began riding my bicycle as much as possible, lifting weights again, and as best as I can, not drink during the week.

I went 3 days straight this week without a drink, this evening I am drinking some wine and promised myself to stop at 2 glasses and will.

Baby steps, set small goals and build on them, make some changes in other areas, that will help you.

That is what I am doing, I do not want to be in a meeting and feel I have the ability to do this myself. In the past I have cut off booze for a month straight and feel myself building up to that again.

Good luck, find out why you need to drink and work on it, I honestly have considered seeking professional help even if, like you, its someone to sound off on.

Yes.

Alcohol is a central nervous system depressent. Drinking can make you depressed. Which often leads to self medicating with more drinking. Understanding the chemistry and biology of it helps.

you need to tell yourself that you're done with it right now. it's imperative that you decide by yourself that you don't ever want to drink again. going to rehab means that you are depending on someone else to fix your problem. it doesn't work that way. you have to get the alcohol out of your house and deal with it right now. no bones about it, no cutting back slowly, you're done with it right now, forever. convince yourself and be serious. you don't need an addiction and with your own will power, you can stop immediately. no rehab or anyone else is going to give you will power. it's all about you and your future and your personal pride.

At various stages in my life i quit coke, pot, alcohol, and cigarettes- all cold turkey.

It's the only way to go IMO, and surprisingly easy. Cigarettes were harder to kick than any of the others, and in retrospect, had i known in my youth how easy they would be to kick, i'd have given them up years ago. Havn't had a smoke in almost 3 years now.

Partial cutbacks are a waste of time, and so are other drugs that replace the first drug.

I don't know spit about rehabs, i've never been to one.

If you are to the point where you are worried about it, then it is a problem.

Work with it now before it gets to be a bigger problem.

+1
Quit cigs 16 years ago just because, quit pot 3 years ago because of Co. random drug testing, quit drinking 10 months ago because of spinning the Porsche. All as sniper... cold turkey.
But we are all unique. For some the internal fortitude is enough. For others outside help is needed. What ever works for the individual. Good luck regardless.

[QUOTE=Buckterrier;3930653But we are all unique. For some the internal fortitude is enough. For others outside help is needed. What ever works for the individual. Good luck regardless.[/QUOTE]

+1. Some folks CAN do it solo but it's important not to kid yourself if/when you can't and adjust accordingly.