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A Man of Wealth and Taste
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Out there somewhere beyond the doors of perception
Posts: 51,063
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A Friend Has Cancer
A very good friend of mine has Ovarian Cancer. It has metastised to her Stomach and Pancreas. She has had surgery to remove it, her Surgeon was more optimistic after the surgery than before. He says she has a chanch at 5 years maybe 10. Last week she started a regimen of Chemothearpy.
Yesterday I went to see her, she is taking 6 to 8 750 mg Vicadin a day to manage the pain. It only cuts the pain and doesn't stop it. She is in pain 24/7 and there is no running or getting away from it. For her it is a fact of life. She told me she has an overwhelming feeling that she isn't going to make it. I hope the situation will get better for her. There is nothing I can do to change it, all I can do is stand by and hold her hand as best I can.
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Copyright "Some Observer" |
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05-28-2008, 03:29 PM
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Detached Member
Join Date: May 2003
Location: southern California
Posts: 26,964
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Best of luck to you and your friend Tabs.
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Hugh |
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05-28-2008, 03:32 PM
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jun 2000
Location: N. Phoenix AZ USA
Posts: 28,969
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Tabs,
If you believe in it, prayer helps... for both of you. Will put her on my prayer list. Joe
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2021 Subaru Legacy, 2002 Dodge Ram 2500 Cummins (the workhorse), 1992 Jaguar XJ S-3 V-12 VDP (one of only 100 examples made), 1969 Jaguar XJ (been in the family since new), 1985 911 Targa backdated to 1973 RS specs with a 3.6 shoehorned in the back, 1959 Austin Healey Sprite (former SCCA H-Prod), 1995 BMW R1100RSL, 1971 & '72 BMW R75/5 "Toaster," Ural Tourist w/sidecar, 1949 Aeronca Sedan / QB |
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05-28-2008, 03:32 PM
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Sorry to hear that. How old is she? I have members of my family, friends that have had or still have cancer. Nasty disease. Spend as much time as you can with her.
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1967 911R "Clone" Race Car 2.0 & 2.5 Twin Plug 1984 Mercedes 500 SEC 1991 Mercedes 420 SEL 1992 Ford F-350 Dually 28' Pace Trailer |
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05-28-2008, 03:33 PM
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That is bad, very bad. I would say the surgeon was being overly optimistic.
If she is taking 7.5/750 vicodins, she is going to wipe out her liver, I don't even know why they make that schit anymore. She wants the Norco 10/325. Also, if she takes phenergan or certain other drugs, it potentiates the effect of the pain meds. Narcotics will not stop the pain, only dull it. She might ask for a referral to a pain management specialist.
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She was the kindest person I ever met |
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05-28-2008, 03:35 PM
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A Man of Wealth and Taste
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Out there somewhere beyond the doors of perception
Posts: 51,063
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Good advice Tobra, I will suggest it.
I have been down this road twice before and am under no illusions. Emotionally it is like the bottom of a ship being torn out to see this happen. Here is the long and short of it. When the pain gets overwhelming and you get tired of fighting it death is your relief. God help me for saying it.
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Copyright "Some Observer" |
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05-28-2008, 04:03 PM
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Control Group
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Why? Death is part of life. You see someone you love suffering without hope of relief, what else are you going to think.
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She was the kindest person I ever met |
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05-28-2008, 04:06 PM
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Bandwidth AbUser
Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: SoCal
Posts: 29,522
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Sad news, that's for sure. Best wishes for your friend, tabs.
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Jim R. |
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05-28-2008, 04:07 PM
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Oh man, sad, sad news. I posted on a thread "What do you say to a dying man" that my uncle was diagnosed with a brain tumor. He passed away saturday.
Tabs, I wish good things for your friend whether she wins this fight or not. Hopefully she will, but if she does not I hope she finds some peace in the way she copes with it. Best, Dan
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Dan in Pasadena '76 911S Sahara Beige/Cork |
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05-28-2008, 04:14 PM
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A Man of Wealth and Taste
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Out there somewhere beyond the doors of perception
Posts: 51,063
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I don't want to be the one to say it. I want her to be able to run as far and as hard as she can.
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Copyright "Some Observer" |
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05-28-2008, 04:16 PM
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Registered
Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: Linn County, Oregon
Posts: 48,647
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Tabs, when talking with her, try to get her to look in the rearview mirror...get her to talk of past accomplishments, the good times. Knowing you've done things somehow makes knowing the exit is near makes it hurt less psychologically...
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"Now, to put a water-cooled engine in the rear and to have a radiator in the front, that's not very intelligent." -Ferry Porsche (PANO, Oct. '73) (I, Paul D. have loved this quote since 1973. It will remain as long as I post here.) |
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05-28-2008, 04:19 PM
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Registered
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Socal
Posts: 1,990
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Cancer is a *****. Hope someday they find ways of helping cancer patients more.
Tough times; be it a friend or a relative... God Bless...
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Luis "once was - Wickd89" Carrera 3.2 - "Faster, Stronger, Better" -- 2008 Toyota Camry SE V6 (mine) -- 2005 Toyota Sienna (hers) -- 1989 911 Carrera Cabriolet -SOLD |
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05-28-2008, 08:55 PM
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The Unsettler
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Lantanna TX
Posts: 23,885
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Damn.
Sorry.
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"I want my two dollars" "Goodbye and thanks for the fish" "Proud Member and Supporter of the YWL" "Brandon Won" |
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05-28-2008, 09:03 PM
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Custom User Title
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Miami
Posts: 4,294
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I'd certainly look into pain management immediately. If it was me, even if the pain killers had detrimental effects, I'd rather spend my living days able to enjoy them at least a little bit. Plus, stress is proven to be pretty bad for recovery and the immune system, and that might even be worse than the effects of some strong narcotics. I'd go the drug route- pain is not cool.
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05-28-2008, 11:58 PM
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durn for'ner
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: South of Sweden
Posts: 17,090
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What Tobra said. Pain management is absolutely crucial and a specialist should be consulted preferably. Depending of the type of pain, there are today a decently wide variety of pain relieving medications and treatments.
The brutal fact is that the prognosis is pessima and the pain is both intolerable and, not least, a constant reminder of its cause. Effective pain relief is the basis for being able to, at least part time, experiencing good moments. Really sorry to hear about your friend, Tabs, but I am certain she finds a very good companion and comfort in you as a friend.
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Markus Resident Fluffer Carrera '85 |
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05-29-2008, 12:11 AM
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Control Group
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two words for her
Fentanyl Patches
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She was the kindest person I ever met |
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05-29-2008, 06:30 AM
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Friend of Warren
Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: Lincoln, NE
Posts: 16,506
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I know she is suffering now, but she is not facing a life of pain. Like Tobra said, just need the right pain management for the short term. The doctors have already said she has at least another 5-10 years. That is still a lot of living left!
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Kurt V No more Porsches, but a revolving number of motorcycles. |
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05-29-2008, 06:38 AM
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Registered
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: I'm out there.
Posts: 13,084
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Sorry to hear the bad news, Tabs. Stage 4 ovarian cancer has a 5 year survival rate of about 20%. The average survival after surgery is about a year and a half. Some new chemotherapy regimens (cisplatin) can help.
If your friends pain is simply post-surgical pain, this should be easily addressed. If she is having "cancer pain" she needs a pain management specialist. There are lots of good options for pain relief. Chronic pain is psychologically debilitating. Chronic pain is also very manageable with the right kind of help. Suggest a pain management specialist. Again, sorry about the bad news, Tabs.
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My work here is nearly finished.
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05-29-2008, 06:51 AM
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1967 Porsche 911R Replica 2.3 Litre Race
1967 Porsche 911R Replica 2.2 L Race Engine
2004 Mazda Miata
1987 Porsche 944 2.5
