P.S. - All you guys posting from your work computers...YOU'RE FIRED! :)

if that's the way you want to go, start with something easy like reprogramming an alcoholic.

I understand your situation, but people don't get reprogrammed and I think you will end up just throwing good "money/time/energy/focus" after bad.

True, true.

I was something of a slacker until my mid-30's and then something "clicked" in my brain. Guess I got tired of being a broke-ass. Now, everyone who knows me says I'm a "workaholic". Was kinda hoping this guy would see the light after new wife/baby came along.

And furthermore, I'm a very good technician, but not a good "people-person". Would rather not deal with it, but somethings got to give. I do appreciate all the advice.

Lol, this sounds like the relationship between my boss and I. I like the idea of setting goals and rewards for him, if that is possible.
I've been at my current job for a little over two years, and whether I work hard and finish projects two weeks early or two weeks late, I get the same feedback.
For the first six months I worked here, I worked my ass off, dressed nicely, showed up on time, and was ahead of schedule on just about everything I worked on. The result of my performance review was "meets expectations."
I was a little irritated by that, since our pay increases are directly tied to our performance reviews. So in 2007 I slacked off. I wore old clothes, showed up late, delivered many projects at or after deadline, and was a generally poor employee. My performance review: "Meets expectations." Where's the incentive then?
Now I've found a happy medium, where I deliver projects right at the deadline, and spend many many hours a week on Pelican. There's no future in my job, so why work hard? (Yes, I'm currently looking for a new gig.)

And where are you posting from? :p

I'm the boss. Bosses get to cruise the Internet for porn, Porsches and parody all day. (And, to answer your question, I'm posting from the kitchen of my vacation home).

Only difference is...my guy doesn't work his ass off, nor is ever ahead of schedule (his nickname is "One-Speed"). He just wants a short-cut straight to the "big bucks".

Will you pay for relocation? :D

Of course I will need therapy and heavy medication to deal with the culture shock included in the hiring agreement.

As I said, you can not fix broken people.

Pull the plug now. Your lack of decisive action has had an impact on your company whether you want to admit it or not as evidenced by the above quote. How much revenue has been missed because you sent out a nimrod instead of someone who reflected positively on your company?

Every day you delay is a day you postponed the inevitable while costing yourself additional revenue/customers during the delay.

Yes, the culture shock would be overwhelming. Imagine not having to deal with pretentious, phony, insincere people who are only out for themselves, on a daily basis. Shocking! :eek:

well just keep paying the big bucks and someday ..
it will click..
oh not him..he's not dumb...
seems he has a boss that doesn't want hurt his little feelings....
feelings don't pay bill unless your a hooker..

speak up , or hire someone that will do it for you ..
or be quiet and give him a raise...
as he runs you ....

Rika

Yep...not what I wanted to hear, but what I had to hear.

SmileWavy

Oh .... and happy bosses day (yesterday).

Or you could just send him a link to this thread, and tell him it is his online peer performance review.

He wouldn't read it. Instead of reviewing technical manuals after-hours, he's playing on-line "fantasy" games or poker.

Yep. He is making me money, but I'm wondering how long it will be before he takes his own "raise" (stealing clients, padding hours, etc.).

Although I don't know the right to work laws in your state, you might be best advised to counsel him on the issues, give him a written assessment that he must sign to acknowledge. In this assessment, you specify what he must do to correct the unwanted behavior and by a certain time. That way, you have documented that you tried to address the problem, the employee was informed and given the opportunity to self correct. If he still doesn't get there in the specified time laid out in the evaluation, you let him go if you can no longer tolerate the specified behavior or lack of performance. You might also start interviewing candidates for his position, let him see it.

Have you consider one of those electro-shock dog collar things?

Dude... I'm so going to sue you for saying that... dude!

He's a contract employee. I give him a 1099, not a W2. All I have to do is say "bye".