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A Man of Wealth and Taste
 
tabs's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Out there somewhere beyond the doors of perception
Posts: 51,063
Banned From Cost Co

Yesterday I was at my local COSTCO buying a large bag of Purina Dog Chow
for my loyal pet, Zoe, the Doggie Dog, and was in the
checkout line when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog.
What did she think I had, an elephant? So since I'm retired and
have little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog,
I was starting the Purina diet again. I added that I probably shouldn't,
because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds
before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of
most of my orifices and IVs in both arms. I told her that it was essentially
a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets
with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry.
The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it
again. I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now
enthralled with my story. Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive
care because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, it was because
I stepped off a curb to sniff an Irish Setter's ass and a car hit us both.
I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was
laughing so hard.

Sadly, Costco won't let me shop there anymore.....

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Old 06-06-2009, 03:49 PM
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Banned
 
Join Date: Feb 2002
Posts: 6,930
hahahahahahahaha
Old 06-06-2009, 03:55 PM
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The paragraph is your friend, Theo.






Tim
Old 06-06-2009, 04:05 PM
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winter-hater club member
 
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Location: salt lake city, utah
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banned? if this story is true, that makes it even funnier!
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Old 06-06-2009, 04:51 PM
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No Band
 
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Location: The Casino
Posts: 3,901
Lol, when I make it to the desert Tabby first round is one me!!!
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Old 06-06-2009, 04:58 PM
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A similar event happened to one of the camp-followers.
Jim
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Old 06-06-2009, 05:55 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by nynor View Post
banned? if this story is true, that makes it even funnier!
A friend sent it to me about a month ago....
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Old 06-06-2009, 05:58 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by nynor View Post
banned? if this story is true, that makes it even funnier!

When I read the joke, it was Wal-Mart...
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Old 06-06-2009, 06:24 PM
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one of gods prototypes
 
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Send a message via AIM to bell Send a message via Yahoo to bell
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Old 06-06-2009, 06:25 PM
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Location: Southwest Montana
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In this economy $1.50 hot dog and coke I could not afford to be banned.

On sample days, free tastes, I skip the hot dogs, I have had the sausage an chicken guy's tell me to beat it!
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Old 06-06-2009, 06:52 PM
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ted ted is online now
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like your self a refined dog food story not contrite as others.
banned sorry as a single guy how many Cosco bulk items can you use?
Besides optical just the non perishables?
or is it a fondness for the hot melted free sample Fridays you'll miss most?
If it cheers you up I had my best tenderloin fillet mignon of the year on the backyard grill last night.
cheep at Von's this week.

Old 06-06-2009, 07:17 PM
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