Military Rules
 

from my retired USAF buddy: :D

Marine Corps Rules:
1. Be courteous to everyone, friendly to no one.
2. Decide to be aggressive enough, quickly enough.
3. Have a plan.
4. Have a back-up plan, because the first one probably won't work.
5. Be polite. Be professional. But, have a plan to kill everyone you meet.
6. Do not attend a gunfight with a handgun whose caliber does not start with a '4.'
7. Anything worth shooting is worth shooting twice. Ammo is cheap. Life is expensive.
8. Move away from your attacker. Distance is your friend. (Lateral & diagonal referred.)
9. Use cover or concealment as much as possible.
10. Flank your adversary when possible. Protect yours.
11. Always cheat; always win. The only unfair fight is the one you lose..
12. In ten years nobody will remember the details of caliber, stance, or tactics. They will only remember who lived.
13. If you are not shooting, you should be communicating your intention to shoot.

Navy SEAL's Rules:
1. Look very cool in sunglasses.
2. Kill every living thing within view.
3. Adjust Speedo.
4. Check hair in mirror.

US Army Rangers Rules:
1. Walk in 50 miles wearing 75 pound rucksack while starving.
2. Locate individuals requiring killing.
3. Request permission via radio from 'Higher' to perform killing.
4. Curse bitterly when mission is aborted.
5. Walk out 50 miles wearing a 75 pound rucksack while starving.

US Army Rules:
1. Curse bitterly when receiving operational order.
2. Make sure there is extra ammo and extra coffee.
3. Curse bitterly.
4. Curse bitterly.
5. Do not listen to 2nd LTs; it can get you killed.
6. Curse bitterly.

US Air Force Rules:
1. Have a cocktail.
2. Adjust temperature on air-conditioner.
3. See what's on HBO.
4. Ask 'What is a gunfight?'
5. Request more funding from Congress with a 'killer' Power Point presentation.
6. Wine & dine ''key' Congressmen, invite DOD &defense industry executives.
7.. Receive funding, set up new command and assemble assets.
8. Declare the assets 'strategic' and never deploy them operationally.
9. Hurry to make 13:45 tee-time.
10. Make sure the base is as far as possible from the conflict but close
enough to have tax exemption.

US Navy Rules:
1. Go to Sea.
2. Drink Coffee
3. Send in Seal Team
4. Drink Coffee.
5. Deploy Marines (with Seal Team intel.)
6. Pick up Seal Team and Marines after objective is Destroyed
7. Drink Coffee

Go Navy !


And the next... (You've got to love the military, and God bless them all.)

U.S. Navy Directive 16134 ( Inappropriate T-Shirts ) The following
directive was issued by the commanding officer of all naval installations in the Middle East .
(It was obviously directed at the Marines.)

To: All Commands Subject: Inappropriate T-Shirts
Ref: ComMidEast For Inst 16134//24 K
All commanders promulgate upon receipt.

The following T-shirts are no longer to be worn on or off base by any military or civilian personnel serving in the Middle East :
1. 'Eat Pork or Die' [both English and Arabic versions]
2. 'Shrine Busters' [Various. Show burning minarets or bomb/artillery shells impacting Islamic shrines. Some with unit logos.]
3. 'Napalm, Sticks Like Crazy' [Both English and Arabic versions]
4. 'Goat - it isn't just for breakfast anymore.' [Both English and Arabic versions]
5. 'The road to Paradise begins with me.' [Mostly Arabic versions, but some in English. Some show sniper scope cross-hairs.]
6. 'Guns don't kill people. I kill people.' [Both Arabic and English versions]
7. 'Pork. The other white meat.' [Arabic version]
8. 'Infidel' [English, Arabic and other coalition force languages.]

The above T-shirts are to be removed from Post Exchanges upon receipt of this directive. In addition, the following signs are to be removed upon receipt of this message:

1. 'Islamic Religious Services Will Be Held at the Firing Range at 0800 Daily.
2. 'Do we really need 'smart bombs' to drop on these dumb bastards?

All commands are instructed to implement sensitivity training upon receipt.

Incoming rounds have the right of way

you forgot..........."when in doubt...........EMPTY THE MAGAZINE!"


seen that before, its great. and TRUE! LOL!

old one of mine..
we flew 3000K to 'smoke' this Camel..

Rika

Paul, the Navy rules clearly are lacking. #1a on the list is chasing tail in liberty ports. #1b is consuming massive quantities of alcohol in liberty ports. #1c is trying not to get picked up by shore patrol / local police in liberty ports. #2 is drink massive quantities of coffee. I think that's all I remember from my daze in the service.

Friendly fire isn't.

If your ambush is going as planned, you're probably walking into one.

Randy

automatic weapons aren't
your weapon was made by the lowest bidder.

Hurry up and wait.

Sounds like my hitch in the Navy

Yep. The only other things I remember are bug juice and the phrase "make a hole."

"Always remember that your weapon was made by the lowest bidder."

The only easy day was yesterday.

+1


Plus..."Pack it in, make a friend, if the person in front of you isn't smiling, then you're not close enough"

I remember drinking a lot of coffee "bug juice" in the Navy...but not in whites (which seemed to attract anything liquid) :D

Off limits bars in liberty ports always had directions to get there, and every cab driver knew the way.

If you find yourself in a fair fight, your tactics suck.

*The easy way is mined.

Always.

*Incoming fire has the right of way.

"It's not the bullet with my name on it that bothers me, it is the one marked "To whom it may concern"