Mike, I'm sorry to hear this bad news.


KT

So sorry Mikey.

My daughter had her first Holy communion today. I pray that your uncle finds peace.

Dunno what else to say.

Very sorry to hear it. I unfortunately know from experience how dreadful of an experience this is on survivors. Savor life...

Mike,
Sorry to hear this. My neice and my ex-wifes husband (my kids stepdad) both committed suicide a year and a half ago within two days of each other ( there's a thread on it).
Before anyone should get pissed at the victom remember it's a symptom of mental illness.
It's the #9 leading cause of death in this country (not totally sure on the rank but that is close).

Lost a friend to this as well. You will never hear me get pissed, just a great sense of loss.

Mike,

Sorry for the loss, it is very painful.

Mikey, I completely understand the feelings of anger mixed in with some guilt. That's normal and I went through the same thing.
Focus on the anger and turn it into something constructive, that's what helped me.

Background:
In the late 80's I got a call from the operations folks at the refinery that a critical piece of equipment in the plant was acting up.

I grabbed my best friend (that I worked with) and said come on. He said where we going, I said just get in the truck.
I drove over to that part of the plant and jumped out of the truck and rushed up onto the platform deck where the machine was. He followed me.
I didn't stop to assess the sitch, I didn't ask what was going on, I just ran up there to save the day and he followed.
We were on the deck only a few seconds when the surface condenser under the turbine popped.
Thousands of gallons of very hot water mixed with steam blew out.
I can't remember exactly what happened next but I hit the guard rail on the end of the deck and went over and landed on some other machinery about 15 feet below. I was banged up and cut a little and had some 2nd degree burns, but my best friend didn't get off the deck. I looked up and he was just standing there with steam boiling off of him. He was just staring off into the distance.

He spend a couple months in the burn ward and was off work for almost a year. His burns were in places that were not normally visible, no scars on his face or hands. It was where the hot water was absorbed by the clothing where the worst burns were.
I couldn't go see him in the hospital and we we were never really close again.

About a year later I got married, he drifted from one bad life decision to the next, until he committed suicide.
At one time he was a very happy individual, reasonably successful, with the perfect personality. He was friends with everyone and he didn't have an enemy in the world.
That all changed and he because self-destructive.
I was very angry for a long time, at him for making that decision and at myself too.
It doesn't get easier, it just gets less intense.

You have my condolences Mike.

Save yourself some pain and don't try too hard to understand why he did it.

You did the best you could to help him but the reasons he felt the way he did are complicated and very difficult to understand.

Stay focused on your family and seek help if you feel you're not coping.
There's no shame in asking for help if you need it and no body needs to know about it either.
There are support groups for people who have lost loved ones to suicide.
Your local doctor can help you make contact with these groups.

Just got a call from a forensic clean up service......$2K, minmium....the hits just keep on coming.....

Sorry to hear the bad news Mike.

Late to this, wow, sorry dude. As someone posted earlier, they don't think about who is left behind. Same thing with young kids who drive stupid and die. One of my triplet sisters was a victim of that, he lived, of course.

Yep, it sucks. Had a coworker do himself in and it was obviously planned. Only thing on his desk that morning was everything he did documented to the T. He was big into turbo K cars, and a corner worker at VIR. I don't think anyone here knew he had a history of depression, just seemed like your typical even keeled, never get excited kind of guy. I think it's the only wake I've ever been to angry.

Mental note to cut people more slack because i never know what they've been though...

Sounds good to me. That's on my list as well.

It is hard to comprehend the pain and sadness that some people go live with on a daily basis.

So sorry to hear this Mike.

My stepdaughter is an investigator for the medical examiner. It freakin boggles my mind, the amount of suicide cases she gets. Especially among teens and 20-somethings.

Sorry for your loss, Mike.

Sad stuff, Mikey. Sounds like you are doing ok. You know the drill so reach out if needed.