Andy Rooney on Women over 50...

[M.D. Holloway]

60 Minutes Correspondent Andy Rooney (CBS)

As I grow in age, I value women over 50 most of all. Here are just a few reasons why:

A woman over 50 will never wake you in the middle of the night & ask, 'What are you thinking?' She doesn't care what you think.

If a woman over 50 doesn't want to watch the game, she doesn't sit around whining about it. She goes and does something, she wants to do, & it's usually more interesting.

Women over 50 are dignified. They seldom have a screaming match with you at the opera or in the middle of an expensive restaurant. Of course, if you deserve it, they won't hesitate to shoot you, if they think they can get away with it.

Older women are generous with praise, often undeserved. They know what it's like to be unappreciated.

Women get psychic as they age. You never have to confess your sins to a woman over 50.

Once you get past a wrinkle or two, a woman over 50 is far sexier than her younger counterpart.

Older women are forthright and honest.. They'll tell you right off if you are a jerk or if you are acting like one. You don't ever have to wonder where you stand with her.

Yes, we praise women over 50 for a multitude of reasons. Unfortunately, it's not reciprocal. For every stunning, smart, well-coiffed, hot woman over 50, there is a bald, paunchy relic in yellow pants making a fool of himself with some 22-year old waitress. Ladies, I apologize.

For all those men who say, 'Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free? Here's an update for you. Nowadays 80% of women are against marriage. Why? Because women realize it's not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage!

[widebody911]

Because women realize it's not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage!

That's gold right there!

[kach22i]

.......................little sausage

Funny indeed.

[McLovin]

to rooney, bagging a 55 year old would be robbing the cradle.

[Paul_Heery]

Andy Rooney is an old hack that can't pull together a coherent thought, let alone a sentence.

That passage above was penned by Frank Kaiser.

snopes.com: Andy Rooney on Older Women

[AFC-911]

Andy Rooney is a hack. He's even admitted he doesn't know who the biggest young artists are, even though it's his job to stay in the loop.

Anyway, I love cougars. I don't mind if they're nearly twice my age.

As a side note, younger women these days don't do the cherry stem thing...I only get that with older women...Must be a generational thing (though, it is pretty hot).

[bivenator]

As Benny Hill said of older women "They don't yell and they don't tell and they are grateful as hell."

[Danny_Ocean]

Q: What do women and dog poop have in common?

A: The older they get, the easier they are to pick up...

[motion]

What do older women put behind their ears to attract young men? Their ankles.

[widgeon13]

Andy hasn't been on a woman in a long f'king time.

[Evans, Marv]

If Andy got on a woman his eye brows would probably tickle the hell of her & ruin the whole mood.

[kach22i]

FALSE........Andy Rooney did not write this.

snopes.com: Andy Rooney on Older Women

In the future, please run your own Snopes search before posting.

[M.D. Holloway]

Oh for Pete sake! Who the F*** cares who wrote it? You think SNOPES is the be-all end-all? Let me tell you, the chances of someone actually writing something 100% original died 2500 years ago...

Just enjoy the coffee and don't think about the roasting process will ya!

[kach22i]

It's a sausage fest in here.

[speeder]

I wouldn't know, I've never had one over 40. (I'm over 50). I guess it's a new experience to look forward to.

FWIW, Ben Franklin wrote an essay on the attraction of older women. He was quite the poon hound, apparently.