I did that for one of my staff once. She had 3 kids, nanny and husband who had his own business.

She was lobbying for a raise, complaining about her expenses.

I asked her why she even bothered working. She said for the benefits package.

I did the math with her and showed her that she was working 40 hours a week for benefits when at her rate she only needed to work 5 to cover a benefits package out of pocket. If she worked more than 5 she was coming out ahead.

Told her she'd be better off dumping the nanny and working freelance.

She did not get it.

pretty good with an egg!!

http://forums.pelicanparts.com/uploa...1310658638.jpg

ahhahahhaha...dibs on your 79 SC motor!!

So, My wife decided to change careers after our first was born. She went from actually making more than me as a CPA at a large bank to making enough to pay for our day care needs.

She did that mostly for the last 3-4 years (hard to believe it's been that long) and I won't say it was wonderful. In that time I was making decent money - I was really worried about getting laid off from my job from 2008 to 2010 but that didn't happen and in the mean time I was making decent money and didn't have a commute. We had a lot of time with the kids - it would have been better if I hadn't been stressed about my job but such is life.

Earlier this year she got fed up with where she was doing her part time work - it was a non-profit and the Executive Director was kind of a lush (I won't say 'Drunk' but it was probably close to that). There was a big hoopla, the ED was suspended by the board and then reinstated shortly after but at that point half the board resigned and they cancelled their events for the remainder of the year. My wife was the event coordinator - so basically all her work was cancelled and she decided to part ways. She is not working now and at the moment has no plans to start working. So now we're truly on a single income. I have made some good job choices - I've been in a new job for just shy of a year now making enough for us to be comfortable. Over the last few years I have also done quite a bit to streamline our expenses including refinancing our mortgage when rates were really low. Cutting bills down where I Could, things like cable and what not. We have the bare bones but with netflix (regardless of their rate increase) we're good. We go out less, have fewer real vacations but still do things. Unfortunately, food expenses are way high so that sucks.

All in all though - I wouldn't want the wife going back to work full time until the kids are older. It was funny - kind of - she said something in passing about going back to work when the boys are older and I reiterated that it would be nice if she went back full time and it was funny because she looked at me like I had two heads.

Stressful thing now is that my current company is looking at a massive layoff in the next month I guess. I'm praying it isn't me - I'm a new guy though so who knows. My performance is excellent but that isn't always enough. I hope to dodge the bullet as I have done in the past.

My wife stopped working with the birth of our eldest. We were single income until my girls turned 16 and 14. At that point my wife was ready to return to the work force.

I told her from day one that I would do whatever it took to make that happen. As for coping, we lived within our means.

I will admit it has been nice to have the second income for the last couple of years but, it does have an affect in other areas of everyday life.

My wife has no desire to work outside the home. I'm glad that she feels this way. My 8 year old daughter and I reap the benefits. My mom was a stay at home mom her entire life (even after us kids were gone). I would feel like a failure if I had to rely on my wife's income to make ends meet.

I would estimate that easily, over half of the guys that I work with are having an affair, or plotting their next one. I would estimate that over half of the women that I work with are having an affair, or plotting their next one.

I think that the constant contact that having a "non-working wife" affords us girds our marriage against the constant temptations that present themselves.

During the real estate boom, I made money in huge chunks. But I knew that it wouldn't last so we "paced" ourselves accordingly and used the profits to buy more units. We are right side up on everything that we have borrowed to buy. I feel no sympathy for people who were "tricked" into buying houses that they couldn't afford.

We like nice things, but don't let them rule our lives. If we lost everything that we don't already own outright tomorrow, it wouldn't be the end of the world.

We have a family dinner at Chipotle pretty much every Friday evening, and we go out to lunch after church on Sundays.

We vacation in the USA and ALWAYS stay at Hampton Inn, except in Vegas.

I'll probably never own a Piper Meridian, but there is nothing wrong with a nice, used Cirrus...

I don't know life is short...... you don't have to go crazy frugal :rolleyes:

your family will be much, much richer for it, and your kids will flourish. You will do well to recognize and remember your wife does have a job at home. I wish you all the best in taking advantage of this great opportunity.

+1. We made the jump to a single income household 14 years ago and it has been a struggle but our entire family has benefited in so many more valuable ways. So things you just can't put a price tag on.

We went to one income about 10 years ago after birth of eldest daughter (of now three) and more than halved our household income (yes, she made more than me). We try to live frugally, and most of the time things are tight, but we have no debt other than mortgage (which will be paid off in 7 years... 8 paid already on 15 year mortgage, so payments are not inconsequential). Compared to our friends, things we've done to save money:

- We've stayed in the same house where all of our friends and neighbors have "moved up" and are on second or third house upgrades.
- No cable or satellite, just an outdoor antenna mounted in the attic. We get all of the major networks (and then some) in full HD. (Haven't really missed satellite that much)
- Pay as you go cell plans, and no data plans. Based on usage costs about $15/month per phone.
- Newest car is 10 years old. But both DD's are still reliable. Insurance deductibles are high at $1000.
- "Smaller" vacations.... instead of ski trips to CO, we drive to NC or WV. End result is just as good!
- No paid lawn service. Instead I got a used rider and can mow/edge the lawn in under an hour (vs 2.5+ previously). Paid for itself in two months (not counting my 4-6 hours/month that I put in) = saves $220/mo.
- No maid service. (and my wife still has plenty of time for FB and Sorority Life :rolleyes:)
- No more autoX/track days and associated budget (that one hurts)
- and lots of the other mentions like less eating out/entertainment/etc.

Is it worth it? For the kids: yes. Wife: YES. For me: honestly not sure. There's definitely sacrifice involved, depends on how much you want to personally "give up". It can be tough at times, but I'm sure you can make it if you're willing to try hard enough and think creatively.

Good luck!

My wife hasn't worked in over twenty years and has no interest in working. It's funny when she gets her SS summary with SS and Medicare Income history - a page full of zeros. I am thankful she never had to work and was/is always there for our kids. Other than being married to a loser, she's had a pretty soft adult life.

Lots of great advice and encouraging words. Thanks very much folks.

Going to pull the trigger at the end of August. I'm sure we'll be fine. We've always lived well within our means plus we're super savers from way back. I will miss the great vacations and dining out though.

When we were first married, my wife had the larger income. With the birth of our eldest, she brought her business home, and then over a year, it slowed down until it stopped. I think that was easier than cold turkey.

My kids, and particular one with special needs, benefited in ways that transcend monetary value.

This also enabled me to focus on my career in a way that would have been impossible if we had to juggle two jobs. I work hard, travel, late nights, etc. - I've never been an 8-5 guy, too ambitious and driven.

When our youngest started driving, my wife started to work again for her own mental self-preservation. I work from home, I can't imagine how folks with two careers manage.

I will say that if Mom would rather be at work than at home, then two careers is better. Or be a kept man. Nothing is worse than a mom that does not want to be a stay at home mom.

Thanks Don. We have something in common. My little boy has special needs hence the nanny. My wife would rather stay home and care for him of course but it seems unwise to give up a great second income, especially in this economy. At the end of the day though, Lucas is our first priority.

There is the cooking thread you know. :)

Got married two years ago for the first time... I was 52... talk about lifestyle change!

But at my age I have spent enough nights howling at the moon and was ready for the change.

Life is an adventure!

Yup, guess we'll learn to cook.

Again, I suspect your happiness will and connection with the things you love will increase as your (combined) hours of working outside the home decrease. It's a blessing.