A tourist walked into a Brighton antique shop. After looking around for a while, he noticed a very life-like bronze statue of a rat. It had no price tag, but it was so striking that he decided to buy it anyway.

He took it to the owner and said: 'How much is this bronze rat?'

The owner replied: 'It's £12 for the rat, and £100 for the story.'

The tourist gave the owner his £12 and said: 'I'll just take the rat, you can keep the story.'

As he walked off down the street, he noticed that a few real rats had crawled out of the sewers and begun following him. This was a little disconcerting, so he started to walk a little faster, but within a couple of blocks the swarm of rats had grown to hundreds, and they were all squealing and screeching in a very menacing way.

He increased his speed & ran on towards the beach, and as he ran, he looked behind him and saw the rats now numbered in their millions, and they were running faster & faster. By now very concerned, he ran down to the pier and threw the bronze rat far out into the water.

Amazingly, the millions of real rats jumped into the water after it and were all drowned.

The man walked back to relate all this to the shop owner, who said: 'Ah, you've come back for the story then?'

'No,' said the tourist, 'I came back to see if you've also got a bronze Muslim Fundamentalist Cleric, a couple of illegal immigrants,a Collingwood supporter, and anything from New Zealand!' “

:p

A couple living in a small Midlands village take on an 18-year-old
girl as a lodger. She asked if she could have a bath but the woman of
the house told her they didn't have a bathroom as such but she could
use a tin bath in front of the fire.

"Monday's the best night, when my husband goes out to darts," the
woman said. So the young girl agreed to have a bath the following
Monday night.

After her husband had gone off to the pub for his darts match, the
woman filled the bath and watched as the girl got undressed.

She was surprised to see that the young lass didn't have any pubic
hair and told her husband when he came home. He didn't believe her, so
she said, "Next week, when you go off to darts, I'll leave a little
gap in the curtains so that you can see for yourself, alright?"

The following Monday night, while the girl got undressed for her bath,
the wife asked her, "Do you shave down there?"

"No," replied the girl, "I've just never grown any hairs down there.
Do you have hairs on yours?"

"Oh, yes," said the woman and she showed the girl her hairy muff.

After the girl had gone to bed the husband came home and the wife
asked, "Did you see it?"

"Yes," he said, "but why the hell did you have to show her yours?"

"Why not?" she said, "You've seen it before.”

"I know," he replied, "but the darts team hadn't!"

:p

can you confine your screed to PARF?

+1
only post that makes any sense

G20...
 

He's back!

BO made a great speech today. He talked about the region, the future and a continued US presence in the Pacific region. (more US Marines to be based in Darwin)

Honestly... He's like a Rock Star down here. Everybody seems to love him.

http://forums.pelicanparts.com/uploa...1416043583.jpg

http://forums.pelicanparts.com/uploa...1416043596.jpg

That's because you get to send him back!

One term? What?

Shinola is an American watch company. Seems they could have cobbled something together to commemorate hope and change.

Who is the milf?

Leave it to Markus to ask the important question

I assume you mean this lady Markus.

That's Julia Gillard. She was the Prime Minister last time Barrack visited.

Julia Gillard - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

I thought you were joking. :rolleyes:

Shinola

[QUOTE=sc_rufctr;6373661]Maybe "most" of us do ;) ;) /QUOTE]

Payback for Aussies pitching in in the middle east over the past decade or so. Thank you for your support.

Thanks! She looks pretty perky. Wonder whats on her mind at that moment.. :D

It was an issue that seemed overlooked. :)