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12-27-2011, 10:48 AM
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Good call. There's no harm in giving him the honor guard. Funerals have little to do with the deceased. The guys in your department need to care more about his kids than themselves and their anger.
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Aaron '81 911SC RoW Targa |
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12-27-2011, 11:02 AM
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Location: Texas
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Vinny knows much about me...
so I'm laying some more out here.. I was burnt more than your mothers toast.. I so wanted to die.. there is pain.. and then your whole being on fire.. folks ..you have NO IDEA.. and I am gratefull you don't... I don't know his reasons or pain all one /you can do now is honor his time & service.. folks.. I still remember the smell & the why.. so unless you've been there.. easy with your judgement... because like Vinnie's friend ... you can feel alone in a big crowd & amongst your best friends.. Rika Last edited by Rikao4; 12-27-2011 at 11:56 AM.. |
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12-27-2011, 11:47 AM
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Senior Member
Join Date: Mar 2000
Location: Lacey, WA. USA
Posts: 25,309
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Yes. Full fire fighter's honors, unless there is some rule prohibiting. Funerals are for family.
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Man of Carbon Fiber (stronger than steel) Mocha 1978 911SC. "Coco" |
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12-27-2011, 11:57 AM
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Vinny, thanks stepping up, as Supe said, it is really for the kids...
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Byron  20+ year PCA member  Many Cool Porsches, Projects& Parts, Vintage BMX bikes too |
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12-27-2011, 12:14 PM
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Slackerous Maximus
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Columbus, OH
Posts: 18,206
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For the children, yes.
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2022 Royal Enfield Interceptor. 2012 Harley Davidson Road King 2014 Triumph Bonneville T100. 2014 Cayman S, PDK. Mercedes E350 family truckster. |
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12-27-2011, 12:24 PM
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Location: Maryland
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The below is humbling; a moment of confession and clarity rarely found.
I value your perspective more than you know, Rika. Vinnie, let your men read the words of a man. Quote:
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1996 FJ80. |
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12-27-2011, 12:33 PM
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Location: Calgary Alberta, CANADA
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+1
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We're all in the gutter,but some of us are looking at the stars. -Oscar Wilde |
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12-27-2011, 12:54 PM
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Banned
Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: los angeles, CA.
Posts: 41,306
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Rika and Vinny...2 of the few that I'd really like to meet.
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12-27-2011, 03:09 PM
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no anwer from me. I just want to say that it's it terible for his wife and kids. It is a big permanent damage, so anything you can do to help their feeling would be the good thing.
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Fat butt 911, 1987 |
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12-27-2011, 03:23 PM
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Byron 20+ year PCA member Many Cool Porsches, Projects& Parts, Vintage BMX bikes too |
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12-27-2011, 06:52 PM
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No.
Full service funerals are for those who die in the line of duty. I had a coworker/friend who shot himself several years ago. It had nothing to do with work, it was due to his lousy wife decided she loved someone else. Several department personnel were there in uniform but it was not the full shut down every street, fly over, honor guard police funeral.
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Michael Last edited by MMARSH; 12-28-2011 at 07:30 AM.. |
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12-27-2011, 07:25 PM
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Location: I be home in CA
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Dan |
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12-27-2011, 09:22 PM
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Serious Question. Where do you draw the line? If I get killed while riding my motorcycle off duty, should I get a full Police funeral for the 20+ years of honorable service I've done. what if I slip in the tub....people already complain about where their tax dollars are going....
Personally, I've been to way to many funerals where cops (some my friends) were shot and killed in the line of duty. It's horrible. But we honor them for the ultimate sacrifice they made. When I die, if its off duty, I will not belittle the honor those men earned in blood by getting a full police funeral. YMMV.
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Michael |
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12-28-2011, 07:54 AM
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Location: Cambridge, MA
Posts: 44,473
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We care about the kids. Line drawn.
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Tru6 Restoration & Design |
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12-28-2011, 07:59 AM
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Let me add, if his suicide was in any way job related, different story.
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Michael Last edited by MMARSH; 12-28-2011 at 08:21 AM.. |
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12-28-2011, 08:17 AM
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Information Junky
Join Date: Mar 2001
Location: an island, upper left coast, USA
Posts: 73,167
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When everyone 'wins an award' /special honors, those honors are not so special anymore. side note; it is Soooo easy to say "give them something special" ...even if they are/were not. I mean, it's other people's time and money that you're giving to the "needy." btw, everyone deals with death, so try to be appropriate. That is, if the guys in the unit really want to put on a big show for the guy, then great. But not everyone on this planet deserves a parade for dying. ...or for dying as a mentally ill firefighter. Hey, who was the postman who went postal? -Did he get a parade? I mean, clearly he had a tough job there.
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Everyone you meet knows something you don't. - - - and a whole bunch of crap that is wrong. Disclaimer: the above was 2¢ worth. More information is available as my professional opinion, which is provided for an exorbitant fee.
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12-28-2011, 08:32 AM
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Location: Cambridge, MA
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Dying in line of service: yes
Dying by accident outside the job: no Committing suicide with no children: no Committing suicide with adult children: no Committing suicide with young children: yes
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Tru6 Restoration & Design |
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12-28-2011, 08:34 AM
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Information Junky
Join Date: Mar 2001
Location: an island, upper left coast, USA
Posts: 73,167
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Shaun, that is a pretty good point. (for the children) --seriously.
But what if the children know that dad did himself in? ...that dad chose to LEAVE his children? Do you still pretend that dad was oh-so honorable because he was a cop/firefighter/postman... ?
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Everyone you meet knows something you don't. - - - and a whole bunch of crap that is wrong. Disclaimer: the above was 2¢ worth. More information is available as my professional opinion, which is provided for an exorbitant fee.
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12-28-2011, 08:41 AM
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Location: Cambridge, MA
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the children will know their dad did himself in.
The honor guard is part of the healing process for the kids. an important one.
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Tru6 Restoration & Design |
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12-28-2011, 08:57 AM
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