X wife ruins Son's gift of an Xbox from me in the mentalist way!out of

[mikeesik]

Hello.

I can barely believe this and neither can most I've spoken to.

I purchased an X-box for my Son with a steering wheel and additionals for his Birth-Day. That was 1 year ago. He adores it. It makes him happy and gives him something to do when he's with the other-side.

He LOVES to drive and is good at it. I am very entertained to just watch.

His mother then got him a Sony PSB for this years B-day. It was with one game. A shooting game which he liked.

Simon just loves the x-box games which are about racing and driving. He plays the x-box almost always.
His mother has commented that if he doesn't play more with the psb she'll take it back to the store.

He brings the X-box here on weekends sometimes and takes it back to his mothers.

Anyway, his mother lost it a couple of weeks ago and threatened Simon that she will throw it out if he doesn't play with the psb more.

Simon brought over the X-box for this weekend and he hooked it up. He started to have problems with it such as loading up and then while everything seemed o.k the background graphics became phsycedelic . We then shut off and there was no way to reload. We tried and tried. Reboot -reboot.
I asked Simon then to remove the top to get an amateur look at it , in case there was something obvious.

What I found was a stench of perfume concentrated in/on the contacts.

I thought I was going crazy. Perfume stench in the contacts and in the hard drive!!!?

There is NO reason for that unless someone sprayed it down the holes.

This is perfume and it's his mothers.

I figured it shorted and corroded the circuits and now the box is useless.



I KID YOU NOT. THERE IS A STENCH OF PERFUME AND A STAIN WHICH LOOKS FLAT against the plastic.

Like I said there is a stench of perfume coming out of the circuit plug.

His mother knows how to remove it and once did and threw it across the room.

I couldn't make this up if I tried!
How sad -for my Son.

[HardDrive]

We are all strangers on the web here. I don't know anything.

Maybe she is trying to do something mean. Or......

Maybe she is recalling an earlier time.....when spring was in the air.....

[Tobra]

I can see why she is the ex-spouse

[mikeesik]

But-can you believe a mother would do this!? I'm absolutely stunned!!

To her Son. He is a jewel-but only a piece of glass to her-as long as he loves me.

So I wrapped up the hardware and will ask the 'family-assessor' to smell this hardware and then tell her my thoughts.

Why the hell would there be such a sharp smell of perfume if she the x------- didn't tamper with it.
I am so done with this divorce and I can't imagine my Son being 12 experiencing so much hatred and lies.
Poor Boy.

[Tobra]

All you can do is the right thing. She is still his mother, no matter how horrible she may be. You can never be badmouthing her, even if he is

[aigel]

Buy a new x-box, install at your house. Done!

G

[sc_rufctr]

Originally Posted by mikeesik

But-can you believe a mother would do this!? I'm absolutely stunned!!

To her Son. He is a jewel-but only a piece of glass to her-as long as he loves me.

So I wrapped up the hardware and will ask the 'family-assessor' to smell this hardware and then tell her my thoughts.

Why the hell would there be such a sharp smell of perfume if she the x------- didn't tamper with it.
I am so done with this divorce and I can't imagine my Son being 12 experiencing so much hatred and lies.
Poor Boy.

Mike

You can't control what your ex does. It's a sad situation but that's just the way it is.
Don't let her push your buttons. I feel sad for your son because his mother is obviously petty and stupid. She thinks it's some sort of competition for his affections. Don't even try and understand her.

What a lot of parents just don't get is that children are loyal to both parents when they separate.

I would buy him a new X Box for YOUR house and that's it. Try and explain to your son why your doing this without putting down his mother.

The perfume??? Well who knows for sure? Well your ex does but she'll never fess up to vandalising her SONS X Box.

For what it's worth... Your son will most likely end up living with you full time.
Boys who have been raised by their mother alone tend to seek out their fathers when they get into their teen years.

EDIT: My ex wife still hates me after being separated/divorced for 10 years. (I raised my children on my own)

[targa911S]

Originally Posted by Tobra

All you can do is the right thing. She is still his mother, no matter how horrible she may be. You can never be badmouthing her, even if he is

Yes sir, Never put yer kids in the middle. when they get older they will sort things out for themselves.

[72 four door]

That is a FACT!!!! My son lives with me now and barely talks with his mom.

[s_morrison57]

Originally Posted by aigel

Buy a new x-box, install at your house. Done!

G

Thats the answer, the old x-box is shot and could be because of the perfume but it could have been an accident that the ex is afraid to admit to. Just sayin but you would know her and her capabilities the best of anyone here.
I really feel for you and your situation, a happy split still effects the kids to some extent, an angry split is so much more difficult for everybody, more so for the kids.
Hang in there it will only get better with time, let her live her petty life and do the best for your son, the satisfacton of the situation is, by doing the right thing you will have a son/buddy for life were as she will grow to be a lonely old woman that no one will have anything to do with. It sounds like she is laying the foundation for her future quite well.
Finn

[bell]

having been in your sons shoes.........
I came home from time with dad......found all the models I spent countless hours building destroyed were talking about 30 of them........haven't talked to her in 20+ ye.ars.........

[herr_oberst]

Originally Posted by Tobra

You can never be badmouthing her, even if he is

This. More than anything else.

[Z-man]

Mike:
I do not mean to offend, but I have seen this before... over on Rennlist...for several years...from a poster called mpesik. Sound familiar?

Listen - I can understand that your divorce has wreaked havoc on your life, and for that, I am truly sorry. My sister went through a bitter divorce over 10 years ago, and she's still having issues... but I digress.

Here's an anology that has worked in my life, perhaps you can gain some assurance from it as well: when I was young, I lived in a certain town in NJ. Very nice town, and based on a local map of the town, I knew my way around my town. Later on in life, I moved to a new town. When I did so, I no longer could use my old map, and had to buy a new map in order to familiarize myself with my new town.

Throw away your old map, Mike. The past is the past, and the old framework of your life is gone. Move on. You are living your life in bitter regret that is all consuming. You are using the old framework -- the old map -- to try to live your new life. She is gone - and that phase of your life is over -- so why do you continue to let her torment you? YOU are essentially letting her continue to do this to you, and your behavior and attitude are evidence of this.

You have a new set of issues to deal with now, and you are letting issues from the past interfere with your ability to deal with these new issues. Stop being a victim, and MAN UP to your responsibilities as a father. Whinning and complaining won't get you the respect from your children or your ex-wife that you so desire.

Throw away the old map Mike - it is of no use for you now.

-Z-man.

[vash]

Sad to put the kid in the middle of a war. Don't participate in your half of the battle.

[Joeaksa]

Remember, she is an "Ex-Wife" for a reason...

Move on and get him something sealed next time... or leave it at your house for when he comes there to visit.

[Zeke]

Originally Posted by bell

having been in your sons shoes.........
I came home from time with dad......found all the models I spent countless hours building destroyed were talking about 30 of them........haven't talked to her in 20+ ye.ars.........

When I separated from my wife there was another woman, my present wife of 30 years. My first wife and I a bad marriage with many infidelities on both sides. She even went to live with another man for 3 months while we were married. So, you would think that finally separating for good would be understood.

Nope. When I left I did not immediately take my stuff. She threw all of my boyhood and family pics in the fireplace. I have nothing from before our marriage.

[vash]

i know this couple that was at war. they would each buy the poor kid nice clothes but he had to change out of them when they left for the other home. he had a "neutral" outfit he had to wear going to and from each home..a grey sweatsuit. he was not allowed to take clothing bought by one parent to the other parents home.

poor kid.

[bell]

zeke....there was allot more going on that I posted way back then......but my point simply reinforces the others advice of not putting the kid on the middle...,..
his son is getting to that age where he'll see first hand what's actually going on and with the right guidance will make the proper decision as to who is acting in his best unrest and who is treating him as a pawn......

[bivenator]

Mike, sorry to hear of your troubles. Her behaviour could be related to a personality disorder, Borderline Personality Disorder or BPD. I will just say that I have similar experiences as yours.
I found a website that you may find helpful, Shrink4men.com. I find a lot of the posters have some pretty good insight.
Good luck,
Scott

[Oracle]

Hard to disagree with you but your ex is probably struggling to get your son to appreciate what she does/buys/etc. for him and she is frustrated..

You have to see the bigger picture, maybe have a chat with your son and tell him that he needs to let Mom knows that they have a relationship of love or whatever.

You don't want to piss her off to the point that your son is in the middle of a battlefield.. I have to bite my lips but I remind my kids to love their Mom too and to let her know.

To prevent issue (cause I started to see them coming) I asked the X to send him over without any video games. He has his toys here.