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-   -   What happened to honoring your word? (http://forums.pelicanparts.com/off-topic-discussions/800571-what-happened-honoring-your-word.html)

cabmandone 03-10-2014 10:27 AM

What happened to honoring your word?
 
So here's my rant, comment if you want. I have in the last 30 days had two deals related to my business where I negotiated a price and terms for purchasing a piece of equipment. When a seller says "it's yours" I take them at their word. When I sell something, I give people my word and hold the piece for them because that's how I want to be treated. No down payment is necessary. One person sent me a text telling me they decided to sell to someone else. The other person I guess at least had the courage to call me and tell me they were selling the piece out from under me. The guy who called said "Obama lied to me about being able to keep my insurance" To which I replied "so someone lying to you gives you the right to lie to someone else? The truly ironic thing about this deal is, the guy complained to me about the city he lives in giving a contract to another company for less than 2000 dollars difference. He felt shorted by the city and couldn't understand why I felt shorted by him when he backed out on his word.
I've now had two dealings here on PP where buyers named their price and I agreed to sell. Both buyers backed out because someone offered them a better deal than they themselves had negotiated with me.

People just don't understand that it's not about the money. It's about the deterioration of our society where people can no longer be trusted to do what they said they would do. I feel like the last of a dying breed.

I'm too young to be old fashioned but I remember when giving someone your word was the best thing you could do. Are those days completely gone? When did the almighty dollar become greater than your honor?

VINMAN 03-10-2014 10:58 AM

unfortunately, those days are long gone.

look 171 03-10-2014 11:03 AM

don't let that discourage you. There are many god honest people out there. Some are not old. I am to young to be old fashion too, or old school for us young dogs, but working my way to be a old fart. I KNOW there are still out there. Good luck.

wildthing 03-10-2014 11:12 AM

These days are gone.
And we can't
Keep holding on.

-or-

It's nothing personal, it's just business.

-or-

Jerry Maguire: tell me you didn't sign. I'm still sort of moved by your "My word is stronger than oak" thing.

-or-

While no goods or services have been exchanged, the agreement can be cancelled at any time.

cabmandone 03-10-2014 11:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by look 171 (Post 7954301)
don't let that discourage you. There are many god honest people out there. Some are not old. I am to young to be old fashion too, or old school for us young dogs, but working my way to be a old fart. I KNOW there are still out there. Good luck.

I can't help but be discouraged. It becomes so frustrating when people back out on something without a single thought. I've had this happen at least 3 or more times each of the last few years. It's getting to a point where I expect it to happen. It wears on me. I often find myself asking at what point do I throw in the towel and just start looking out for me and what's best for me. The dollar can't buy back my self respect once I've sold it to the highest bidder.

I have to wonder if my real problem isn't that I'm too honest. I sell used construction equipment for a living. I'm self employed. When someone asks me what I'm going to do with the equipment, I can't lie. I tell them I buy and sell. That ends up killing a lot of deals because the person selling now knows the machine is worth more than they are asking but again, I'm not going to lie to make a dollar.

As for those days being long gone. They will be missed.

pavulon 03-10-2014 11:17 AM

It's nearly always about money or "me". That's not new. Experience makes it more easily recognized and less well received.

Rikao4 03-10-2014 11:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by VINMAN (Post 7954294)
unfortunately, those days are long gone.

for some perhaps..
certainly not you...
and quite a few other's we know here..

Vinny..you will always put on the gear and go..
regardless of the idiot inside...

Rika

cabmandone 03-10-2014 11:22 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by wildthing (Post 7954318)
These days are gone.
And we can't
Keep holding on.

-or-

It's nothing personal, it's just business.

-or-

Jerry Maguire: tell me you didn't sign. I'm still sort of moved by your "My word is stronger than oak" thing.

-or-

While no goods or services have been exchanged, the agreement can be cancelled at any time.

Wildthing,
I have to hold on. I can't just let people off the hook. That's how this problem has grown to the point where we are today. People have given others a pass for not being honest or for not honoring their word but I won't. I can't.

oldE 03-10-2014 11:27 AM

Sorry for your frustration.

We seem to be in an age where money is considered to be not only the yardstick, but the Most Important Thing.
So: many consider money to be of greater importance than integrity, or quality.
If you have a rational discussion with these folks, they will tell you that they want others to see them as honest, but their actions speak otherwise.

I think we are seeing the value of a personal connection rise in some circles. That's what the "old boy's network" was about. You did business with persons you could trust. It hasn't gone away, but it is harder to find.

That is one benefit to living in a small community. You know the person with whom you are dealing and you guage your risk accordingly. I suppose it could be considered one of the foundations of the "buy local" movement.

Best
Les

Tobra 03-10-2014 11:28 AM

Honor is not old fashioned and never goes out of style. It is just not as common as it used to be.

cabmandone 03-10-2014 11:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pavulon (Post 7954326)
It's nearly always about money or "me". That's not new. Experience makes it more easily recognized and less well received.

Once you become all about the money you're lost. I know in business that for every one I lose I'll gain another but I'm not willing to sell my dignity or self respect at any price to anyone.

onewhippedpuppy 03-10-2014 11:39 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tobra (Post 7954343)
Honor is not old fashioned and never goes out of style. It is just not as common as it used to be.

This. Conduct yourself with integrity, you can only control your own actions. You will stand out because integrity is no longer the norm. Use it to your advantage, there's a lot of power in doing what you say.

Rot 911 03-10-2014 11:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tobra (Post 7954343)
Honor is not old fashioned and never goes out of style. It is just not as common as it used to be.

This. I sold my 911 last year to a member on this board. Did by "electronic handshake." After we agreed on price I got higher offers. Didn't even consider them. A deal is a deal. What price do you put on your word?

As to the OP, obviously those two sellers' word is worthless.

widgeon13 03-10-2014 11:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tobra (Post 7954343)
Honor is not old fashioned and never goes out of style. It is just not as common as it used to be.

How true, just no where near as common. I grew up with it and will stick to my guns until I'm in the ground and then I expect my family to do the same.

oldE 03-10-2014 11:42 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cabmando (Post 7954324)
I sell used construction equipment for a living. I'm self employed. When someone asks me what I'm going to do with the equipment, I can't lie. I tell them I buy and sell. That ends up killing a lot of deals because the person selling now knows the machine is worth more than they are asking

I'm sure you've pointed out you are taking a chance the equipment will be worth more. That is how you make your living, by finding a buyer.
In the meantime, you are reducing their overhead and putting money in their pockets. There is value in that too.
Some understand this, others will hold on to a piece of gear and dump it years later for a fraction.
But you've probably seen that many times.
Best
Les

flatbutt 03-10-2014 11:45 AM

I still give and keep my word...even if I get screwed over. I must be true to myself or I am lost.

Len 911 03-10-2014 12:01 PM

this just happened to me last week. Called a guy and agreed to purchase and he sent me his paypay acount info and then 2 min later said he had a friend local that wanted them and the deal was off.. So I said how about $20.00 more and you know what he said Ok he will send them to me. WTF no thank you sell them to your friend.

gacook 03-10-2014 12:02 PM

Just out of curiosity...do you at least "fix it up" before reselling, or just buy low, sell high?

KFC911 03-10-2014 01:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rikao4 (Post 7954333)
for some perhaps..
certainly not you...
and quite a few other's we know here..
....

Put me on that list if ya don't mind....my "word" has always meant more to me than $. Well, it has so far for the $ amounts that "I've" been tempted with :D

I do agree...PLENTY of honest folks still around but I suspect it is a minority these days.

cabmandone 03-10-2014 01:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by gacook (Post 7954407)
Just out of curiosity...do you at least "fix it up" before reselling, or just buy low, sell high?

I wish I could sell high :) I try to buy low hour equipment that needs little to no work. I service the machine and inspect pins and bushings and replace as needed. I wash them then park them on concrete in a shop to verify there are no leaks. I test the hydraulic system for leaks by placing the boom in the air and checking to see if there is much or any leak down on the cylinders. I have a very good reputation for selling very good used equipment. I'm not saying I can't miss things but I take a great deal of pride in doing what I do and I describe my equipment honestly. If you ask some of my customers they'd probably tell you more than honestly. I floored a customer recently when I realized I sold and shipped them a machine and forgot to replace the windshield washer pump. I put a new one in the mail and apologized for the mistake. They didn't even know the pump didn't work.


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