The "ARE YOU A CURMUDGEON?" test
 

You can take this questionnaire here... http://www.helloquizzy.com/tests/the-are-you-a-curmudgeon-test ...but it includes some kind of registration in order to get a score and will probably install tracking cookies on your computer, and no good curmudgeon would put up with that, so just do a cut and paste below this line.

Feel free to get creative... "Everyone deserves a second chance" except that poopyhead goober 911TurboMudFlap
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In the absence of that system, I guess score yourself after you have answered all the questions. 1 - 10 with 10 being supremely curmudgeonly from answering "a" or "b" in all cases.

1. Do you wish people would just shut up?
a. Yes - all of them, all the time
b. Only the stupid people
c. Not really
d. I don't think people communicate enough, actually

2. What percentage of people are utter morons?
a. 90% or more
b. Between 70% and 89%
c. Between 50% and 69%
d. Between 20% and 49%
e. Less than 20%

3. Mistakes, how tolerable are they?
a. Are you joking? I'm surrounded by fools!
b. If people made fewer errors I wouldn't get the desire to stab them in the eye quite so much
c. Stupid people making stupid errors are the bane of my life
d. Everyone deserves a second chance
e. Mistakes are all part of the learning process, they really aren't a problem

4. When you wake up in the morning, what's the first thing you feel?
a. Rage. Mind bending, arse clenching rage
b. The desire to kick something
c. Give me coffee or give me death
d. Damn, is it time to get up already?
e. Yes! It's a great new day - full of opportunities

5. Strangers
a. Should keep out of my personal space, which has a five mile radius.
b. Are people who have not yet given me a reason to loath them
c. You can't trust someone you don't know
d. Are enemies you haven't yet met
e. Are welcome to eat at my table, sleep in my spare room and steal as much as they can carry
f. It's always nice to meet new people

6. When I meet another curmudgeon I...
a. look down on them with scorn and disgust, whilst I have good reason to feel righteous indignation they are just sulking
b. feel a brief moment of relief meeting someone who confirms my opinion of the rest of humanity
c. take the opportunity to share stories about all the twits who annoy me
d. tell them in a sickly sweet voice "Ooooh, someone got out of the wrong side of bed this morning." Just to annoy them
e. recommend my anger management therapist
f. stay well clear, they look mean

At least i now know what i am.

What's wrong with 70, 89, 50, 69, 20 and 49 percent? This thing just ticks me off. I think the guy who wrote it is an utter moron.

"b. Between 70% and 89%
c. Between 50% and 69%
d. Between 20% and 49%
e. Less than 20%"

Nah...probably just a kid in his early 20s fresh out of college :p

I have a perfect score on the test but I am not going to share that score with a bunch of poopyheads.

You scored 13 on the Curmudgeon-o-meter!
That makes you dour and repressed, but you have yet to reach the status of the true curmudgeon. At best you are a gifted amateur, at worst simply a normal person having a bad day.

Have you tried dwelling on the everyday cruelties that life has inflicted on you? What about the mundane idiocy of day to day life? Think about it - the fire will come.

Could do better. Must try harder.

You scored 6 on the Curmudgeon-o-meter!
That means you occasionally have a niggle. Not only are you far from being a true curmudgeon you hardly reach the status of a sour puss.

Have you tried dwelling on the everyday cruelties that life has inflicted on you? What about the mundane idiocy of day to day life? Think about it - the fire may come, but most have written you off for curmudgeon kind.

You are just too nice. Yuk!

This thread is stupid and you're all poopy-heads!

Get this test off my lawn!

.

don't need the test, i have people telling me all the time how crabby i am.

I printed out and peed on the test......then drove by Sammy's house and peed on his lawn.....

That was you? I guess I did not need to wait until you left to pee on his lawn.

I only got a 7, person who wrote that test is a soft headed mouth breather.

After completing the test, I never realized that the alphabet had that many A's and B's in it.

I think an option for number four should be.....your dick.

My current bimbo has her hand wrapped around it.....but good suggestion for a newb....:p

12 - Dour and Depressed