Ultimately the MIL is the one with the most power to fix this. It was her dad's instrument and she sorta made this mess in the first place. A little chat with her in a calm and non-accusatory manner might motivate her to resolve this peacefully. She could gift the violin to virtuoso granddaughter for Christmas and be a hero. :D

It was your wife's when she was playing.
The cousin's when he was playing.
So should be your daughters while she is playing.
Pleasant phone call from your daughter to the cousin is all it should take.
Definitely the fist approach.

Anyone who appreciates fine music, and the artistry that it takes to play it, would gladly hand over the "family" violin for a performance with such honor as your daughter has been bestowed.

If, however, the nutty Aunt has a problem with it, ask her what her intentions for the violin are, if not to be played.

Yeah that's kind of part of the issue.

She did bring it up a long time ago to try and make it right but SIL pretty much ignored her.

MIL decided to just suck it up but.

My wife brings it up from time to time so I know it's something that still bugs her.

I'm thinking maybe call the cousins wife and ask her opinion of what the reaction might be.

We are both the most emotionally detached from the whole thing.

That way no one is put on the spot and feels pressured to act one way or the other.

We will be at my nephews Bar Mitzvah and it would be grossly unfair to him if we distracted from his day.

Strongly considering that.

Here's the audition video that got them invited to the national competition where they took 1st place.

Remember at the time these were 12-13 yr old 8th graders.

Their orchestra director is Mrs. Weist, the kids call her "Weist the Beast" because she is a perfectionist and drives them so hard. She is proud of that title.

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I think it is ultimately your MIL's responsibility to straighten out this misunderstanding. Whether she takes action seems to be another story. If not, your Wife should get a hold of her cousin and "call the loan" and get the violin back for your daughter. There is a solid reason for getting it back now, if the cousin doesn't understand this I would consider even harsher repercussions no matter what the long term effects were family wise.

Just got off the phone with the cousin.

"Sure she can have it, it's only fair since I got it from Stacy"

Sorry for the wasted drama.

Woah woah woah.

You're not gonna leave us all hangin' about the condition/appraisal of the thing are you?

I just love a happy ending!:)

OK now you're just showing off!
:)

Cousin said he takes it out once a year and plays it.

He said it sounds better than any violin he's ever played.

We'll have it appraised for insurance purposes when we bring it home.

I'm still trying to get my dad's Martin D-28 from my sister who doesnt play. It just sits and collects dust.

Not even so much as a monkey roll?

1st off...STUNNING!!! Lil kids bustin' that out! THIS video should be shown to the cousin so he realizes the gravity of what's being asked...that instrument represents YOUR WHOLE FAMILY'S commitment to music AND FAMILY...he can help embrace it.

2nd...props to the two bottom right who stood on the 1st measure of the song! Not to parf it up, but if more did that I think we'd all be in a better off!

EDIT: Sorry...didn't read to the bottom...now you owe us a video of her performance!

I was hoping for a "demand for production" letter from a ritzy NY legal firm, followed with a marked private dick van camped 24/7 outside their door.
So disappointed.

No worries. This was not even close to the wasted drama of the tree cutting thread!

All this cousin/violin stuff reminded me of a video I uploaded 4 years ago when my father's cousins visited and brought a few of their violins. They are the women standing behind my kids. My father tries to play his violin, he's not that good. His grandfather was a violin maker in Germany. The surprising thing is that BOTH of the grandfathers of these cousins were violin makers. They play much better than my father.

I'm glad that the instrument will be made available to your daughter - who could interfere with something that was so 'right'. Let us know if she likes how it sings.


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Violin may be junk now. If not stored correctly (loosen strings and sound post knocked down) it will probably cost more to repair than it is worth.

Glad this was solved like adults. Male adults.

Carter