Pelican Parts Forums - Just found out my best friend is doing AA

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Yeah. She trusts you. She just doesn't want to hang out with you, and has blown you off 4 times in a row.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gogar (Post 8524293)

Yeah. She trusts you. She just doesn't want to hang out with you, and has blown you off 4 times in a row.

Poor AFC, probably not the responses he was hoping to hear. :eek:

Quote:

Originally Posted by AFC-911 (Post 8523253)

So after she makes plans with me (movies, art show and a concert) and blew me off 4 times, I texted her that it was nice to know that there was no follow through in any of the **** she wants to do.

Turns out she's supposedly blowing me off for AA meetings daily, but why the hell would she not tell me that's what she was doing?

Anyway, she apologized for her behavior of "selfishly blowing me off", but then goes radio silent.

WTF is going on?

If she's going to AA, you might want to consider the possibility that she had gotten kneewalking drunk all 4 times that she was supposed to be meeting you, and that she had had every intention of keeping these dates.

Also, consider that her radio silence might mean she's somewhere where phones are not allowed. If you want to remain besties you need to give her all the space she needs and all the comfort she needs when she needs them.

Only she can tell you why she's behaving the way she is, and she isn't in any condition to be able to do that right now....

AFC-911

Trust me on this.
Your friend has had an intervention or is smart enough on her own accord to stop her
drinking frequency and amount.
She is very fragile now.
Whether she was court appointed by way of a DUI or an employer/family intervention.

AA helps people that come in on their own. Not so much if they are forced.
It is important that you don't ever drink in front of her or spend time together with booze on your breath and buzzed.

It is Life or Death for her now.
You are not an alcoholic and neither am I.
We can have one glass of wine with our dinner every night or down a few brewskies watching the
NBA game on Saturday. She can't.

Tell her that you will never drink in front of her.
Don't do it bro'.
If she is a good friend and you care for her well being, then no booze ever when you two are
spending time together.

Like I mentioned...
If she feels the need for AA, then she needs your support, telling her that you will never
drink around her.
I hope she sorts it out and remains your friend.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rapewta (Post 8524646)

I like this post.

I also think that the OP is definitely in the "friend zone". I've BTDT and if she's an awesome person, then that's probably better for you.

Send her a text/email. Tell her you don't understand what's wrong (let her tell you in her own words what's up) but you are there for her when she wants to talk or needs someone. Leave it at that.

Every 3-4 days send her a smiley face icon.

The title does say "my best friend". I'd just leave her alone after affirming my support and offer of help.

I suppose there is a long list that she is making at #8, and she'll tell you at step 9. Be open to a new person that you used to know.

AFC:

Have you known her to be a big drinker in the past?