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Targa, Panamera Turbo
 
M.D. Holloway's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Houston TX
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Adventures at the Deli or ..."I'm not good at math..."

Stopped by the deli counter to get some cold cuts. Here was the dialogue:

"May I help you?" asked the counter clerk.

"Yes, may I have a quarter pound of maple roasted turkey breast, sliced #1 please." I said.

He looks at me and says "How much is that?"

"A quarter pound please" I say

"I'm not good with math, how much would that be?" He asked.

I swear to God this happened, and he really didn't seem to be f'n with me.

"Point 25 pounds on the scale." I said.

He proceeds to slice the meat and cuts to a #8 which is almost a quarter inch thick. "This good?" he asks.

"No, sorry, way too thick. Set the dial to a 1 and that should do it." I said.

"Oh ya, you said a number 1." He said and started slicing. After a few slices he looks over at me in confusion.

"Tell ya what, slice off 15 slices and we will see what that comes out as." I said to him.

So he does and puts it on the scale. It registers 0.49lb.

"OK, that's fine, I can live with that. That would be almost a half pound." I said.

A smile can to his face. A feeling of accomplishment in a world of disappointment and cured meat.

"Now we know that 15 slices cut at a number one is a half pound, a quarter pound would be...?" I waited for his reply which wasn't gonna happen.

"It would be 7 slices so this is good right? I said. He smiled at me. He didn't get it. I know the look. He didn't get it. It wasn't sinking in. All was lost. I wasn't feeling very good about my teaching skills and even worse about the state of intellectual prowess at the deli counter. At least he didn't cut his finger off...yet.

I took my cold cuts and headed off to the bread counter in hopes of a spirited encounter around the virtues of Soardough over whole grain.

I set my hopes too high...

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Michael D. Holloway
https://simple.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Michael_D._Holloway
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Old 09-01-2015, 01:37 PM
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Baz Baz is online now
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Join Date: Sep 2008
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BTDT.

The only way to look at these situations is at least that person gets up every day and goes to work. There are many who do not and choose to sponge off society.

Perspective.

Great story though - every day is adventure for me as well!
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Old 09-01-2015, 01:43 PM
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well in his defense, you can eat 1/4 lb of deli meat and still be a vegetarian

Or perhaps he was expecting metric units
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Old 09-01-2015, 01:52 PM
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coulda, woulda, shoulda
 
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Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: Louisiana
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I went to a car show at local park last weekend. looked like a high school aged kid collecting $2 entrance fee at the gate.. gave him a $5 and watched the dazed look on his face for a couple minutes while he tried to figure out how much change to give back
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74 911s

They laugh at me because I am different.
I laugh at them because they are all the same.
Old 09-01-2015, 02:01 PM
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Model Citizen
 
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Join Date: May 2007
Location: The Voodoo Lounge
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I hope you didn't give the "round up" when you paid.

Clerk: "That'll be $10.15"

Lubey: "OK, here's $20.25"

Clerk: "Du'h?"
Old 09-01-2015, 02:02 PM
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Lots of snow Porsche away
 
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Calgary Alberta
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last week I argued with a clerk at a 7-11 who had just given me $27.38 in change after a $2.62 debt was paid....with a 5 dollar bill. She acknowledged I had paid her $5, but the machine told her I was owed $27.38 in change and damn if I was not going to take it....Ten minutes in to trying to explain how that math does not work I decided why bother and kept the change.
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Old 09-01-2015, 02:07 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by gordner View Post
last week I argued with a clerk at a 7-11 who had just given me $27.38 in change after a $2.62 debt was paid....with a 5 dollar bill. She acknowledged I had paid her $5, but the machine told her I was owed $27.38 in change and damn if I was not going to take it....Ten minutes in to trying to explain how that math does not work I decided why bother and kept the change.
She typed in $30.
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1986 Bosch Icon Wipers coupe.
Old 09-01-2015, 02:28 PM
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I see you
 
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Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: NJ
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I was watching my son play soccer a while back when a kid comes by and asks " how many halves in a soccer game?" I said "three" he said "thanks". I swear.
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"'Bipartisan' usually means that a larger-than-usual deception is being carried out."
Old 09-01-2015, 02:33 PM
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Location: Winter Haven, FL usa
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I was buying battery cable- actually for the 911 and a race car project- at the local auto parts store.
Big spool of wire- no ruler to be found. Female clerk comes to help. Tells me they measure it by laying it along the floor using the 12" floor tiles. Makes sense. Of coarse she lays it diagonally across the tiles.
I tried explaining to her that a 12" tile has a diagonal measurement of almost 17"
Got that dumb look stare. I showed her with a piece of string that the diagonal and side areactually different lengths - she looked at it like it was a magic trick- did it over and over.
Got a lot of extra wire.
Gary
Old 09-01-2015, 02:45 PM
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---------------------------------------------------------------------------

"There is nothing to be learned from the second kick of a mule" - Mark Twain
Old 09-01-2015, 03:01 PM
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How old was the counter clerk Holloway?
Old 09-01-2015, 03:40 PM
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Sounds like wasted talent to me, this guy could be making $15/hr flipping burgers somewhere.
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Old 09-01-2015, 04:12 PM
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True, at McD's and BK, the burger flippers generally don't handle money.
Old 09-01-2015, 04:24 PM
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resident samsquamch
 
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Let's not even open the Pandora's Box that is, "the lost art of counting back change" (without a register telling the clerk)!
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-jeff
back in the saddle: '95 993 - just another black C2
*SOLD*: '87 930 GP White - heroin would have been a cheaper addiction...
"Ladies and Gentlemen, from Boston Massachusetts, we are Morphine, at your service..." - Mark Sandman (RIP)
Old 09-01-2015, 04:27 PM
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resident samsquamch
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Baz View Post
BTDT.

The only way to look at these situations is at least that person gets up every day and goes to work. There are many who do not and choose to sponge off society.

Perspective.
True.
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-jeff
back in the saddle: '95 993 - just another black C2
*SOLD*: '87 930 GP White - heroin would have been a cheaper addiction...
"Ladies and Gentlemen, from Boston Massachusetts, we are Morphine, at your service..." - Mark Sandman (RIP)
Old 09-01-2015, 04:29 PM
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You want someone who can do a little math? Go to a fabric store. Those old ladies are impressive.

Me: "I need enough fabric to make a stage backdrop. There are two panels, both 16' wide by 12' tall, plus one 6 x 12 panel, and two 2 x 6 panels."

Old lady at counter, without missing a beat: "You'll need 55 yards."

They put Einstein to shame. My wife says they're like that at every fabric store across the land. Old math geniuses with retro reading glasses and blue hair. I swear I heard one of them say to a customer, with a little hand flourish, "Those aren't the drapes you're looking for."
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Charlie
1966 912 Polo Red
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Old 09-01-2015, 04:49 PM
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Targa, Panamera Turbo
 
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Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Houston TX
Posts: 22,366
Quote:
Originally Posted by dan88911 View Post
How old was the counter clerk Holloway?
Maybe late teens, early 20's...

When my Son came home I asked him if he worked the deli counter and I came in and I was wanting 1/4 pound of lunch meat what would he do. Without lifting his head from his iPhone where he was watching reruns of the Office he said "I'd slice some meat, put it on the scale and figure there are 28 grams to an once. Scales I know of all run in metric so I would just multiply knowing that there are 16 ounces in a pound and you want a quarter pound or 4 ounces or like 114 grams around there but I think that's dumb because 4 ounce of meat would barely make a sandwich. You should buy a pound of it instead..."

I think he has a future in sales...the knuckle head would prolly try to sell me some cheese while I was there!
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Michael D. Holloway
https://simple.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Michael_D._Holloway
https://5thorderindustry.com/
https://www.amazon.com/s?k=michael+d+holloway&crid=3AWD8RUVY3E2F&sprefix= michael+d+holloway%2Caps%2C136&ref=nb_sb_noss_1
Old 09-01-2015, 06:03 PM
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Driver
 
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^^^ LOL at Lubey Jr
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1987 Venetian Blue (looks like grey) 930 Coupe
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Old 09-01-2015, 06:12 PM
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White and Nerdy
 
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Location: South of Charlotte N.C.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by craigster59 View Post
If you've ever used their inventory system, they have two options.

Input a part #, or enter a year, the year sorts to just makes in that year, select model, it then sorts just the models of that make/year, then you pick options that might effect parts, THEN you get a menu that shows the different categories of parts to a car.

Unless you have a Part #, "Small block chevy starter" is useless info to the system.
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Shadilay.
Old 09-01-2015, 06:22 PM
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Back in the saddle again
 
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Join Date: Oct 2001
Location: Central TX west of Houston
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tervuren View Post
If you've ever used their inventory system, they have two options.

Input a part #, or enter a year, the year sorts to just makes in that year, select model, it then sorts just the models of that make/year, then you pick options that might effect parts, THEN you get a menu that shows the different categories of parts to a car.

Unless you have a Part #, "Small block chevy starter" is useless info to the system.
Yeah, but I used to work at a retail parts place. There are lots of "options" that most folks REALLY don't get, but whether your truck is 2wd or 4wd is not going to matter one bit to the "system", so I'd just pick one rather than asking. I'd feel like an idiot for even asking that question.

I have been yelled at for asking what size motor was in a car when someone was asking for brake pads. But when I explained that the brakes were different for a 1.2L or a 1.6L and I told him that they were both 4 cylinders, he just yelled louder.

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'08 Boxster RS60 Spyder #0099/1960
- never named a car before, but this is Charlotte.
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Old 09-01-2015, 06:50 PM
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