UncleB,
Sounds like your dad is on the mend. He is fortunate to have two good sons to give him guidance and support :)

Glad to hear that your dad is on the mend.

An update on dad... he is back home and back to his cantankerous self. He has to gain some weight - he lost 20 lbs in this little adventure and his pneumonia is not completely cleared up.

He really does NOT like the hair cut that we got for him the night before we flew out... I don't know what he dislikes more, the haircut or the fact that we had a ladyboy come to the hotel room to cut it for him...

His hairdo is the thing he is most concerned about right now so he MUST be feeling better...

^^^ Saga of a Good Son.

Good on you, unclebilly. Please make sure he stays off the Prednisone now. It will take a year or so for his immune system to recover, from the time he stopped taking. That stuff is poison in continuous use.
Sorry to nag.

He is weening off the Prednisone over the next 3-4 weeks. His lungs are still inflamed. The plan is for Methatrexate to replace the Prednisone.

He never should have been prescribed Prednisone but once you start...

Glad he's ok

I too am having challenges with my Dad, had to check him in to the hospital on the weekend because the care facility we took him to for evaluation said his dementia is too bad for them, and his two doctors said he cannot live by himself anymore.

Within the last month his mind has slipped unbelievably, so sad to see such a strong man changed so much.

Hug your parents and tell them how much you love them, it can all change in a heartbeat.

Going through much the same thing with my dad. Mom is shouldering the bulk of the care and I fear that it is getting to be too much for her.

Hope you find good care for your dad.

Bill and Bob, I feel for you guys. I went through the dementia roller coaster with my grandmother about 10 years ago (I had power of attorney, enduring power of attorney and was her decision maker). 2 weeks ago, I was worried we were at this stage with dad but it looks like we may have dodged this bullet at least for now.

Let me know if you need anything. Take one day at a time, they have good days and bad days. Allow them the dignity of telling you the same story 4 times in 15 minutes. As time goes on, there will be fewer 'good days'. I know this day is coming for my father but thankfully we aren't there now.

Been the caregiver for my Mom with dementia. Finally gotten to the point she was just mentally gone. Got a puppy. Woke her up amazingly. She latched onto and focused on that puppy. The puppy just wouldn't leave her alone either. She started remembering and doing things again so she could take care of the puppy. She went from asking me where we were going 7 to 8 times the 5 mile trip to get her hair done every week to getting up and getting ready without me telling her on beauty shop day so she could go get her hair done. Just amazing.

That's interesting, sadly wouldn't work in my situation. Thanks for the kind words guys, it's funny I work in IT and it's always about getting things done, this is an education in patience for me, even more than my kids :)

Bob,
I am too having an extremely difficult time with my Dad.. the guy who got a cold in like 20 years.. the healthiest man I've ever met now can't even do the most basic thing, we're hiring a full time nurse...
So I am with you.. be strong, say a prayer or two to help our Dads not suffer in their final stage of life..

The saga continues... dad has gradually gotten his feet back under himself over the past 7 months. I call him every day to check on him. Today I called at 11:30 his time and he was completely disoriented and confused. I guess he fell and knocked himself out and when I called he had either just come to or my call woke him up. His head was bleeding.

He had no recollection of why he had the stove pulled out or the microwave taken down. I filled him in based on our conversation yesterday afternoon.

I conferenced my brother in in the call and we checked dad's vitals over the phone as Best we could. He thought it was Monday and couldn't remember my kids names or anything since yesterday and even these details were very fuzzy.

He wouldn't let us call an ambulance and eventually drove himself to the local hospital and the. To the regional hospital for a ct scan.

I'm worried that like his fall inn Thailand, this will cause another Rhumitoid Arthritus flare up or worse. He may have a concussion and we will know more shortly.

What a mess considering my brother and I live 600+ miles away.

You don't let him have a vote on his care and wellbeing under these circumstances. You just tell him you're going to do what is best for him and then you do it. If You believe he's not compentus mentus you don't defer to his judgment. Just do what you know is right.

I suggest it's time to hire around the clock Swedish maids to take care of him in his home and keep him safe and comfortable. My sons have strict instructions that if I get to that point they are to use any money I have to hire round the clock care to keep me in my house. And the round the clock care should come in the form of highly skilled but shapely Swedish (French will do) nurses.

Somehow I missed the original post and thread. Sorry to hear, Billy. Good luck figuring out what to do and how to take care of your father. You and your brother have your work cut out....good luck, sir!

The hospital just called. He left the hospital on his own accord after the CT Scan despite them urging him to stay to see the doc with the results.

This is bad and likely going to get worse...

Do you have power of attorney?

We did the documents with the lawyer this past spring. I'm not sure where the document is. I do have his medical decision maker doc in my possession.

Man, good luck! Can you call the cops or something?

I don't think you should wait this one out if at all possible.

Do you need to have him declared incapacitated or something? Painful but might be time...