That is quite something...difficult to know what to say other than offer my admiration.

My only fear in life is becoming a burden to those I love. I have the financial side taken care of for health care, residence, a living will and other preparations.

What I have seen, regardless of the level of health care provided, a safe place to live, etc., is the emotional price the sons and daughters of dementia and Alzheimer's patents pay. There is no insurance for that, no way to salve the inevitable impact.

All I ask is when I "haue shuffel'd off this mortall coile" I do so sentient.

Sadly, we don't always get what we ask. :( Probably one of the fears of aging. Diminishing mentality and stroke have to be the top two. Given a choice, I'm pretty sure we'd all chose a sudden and fatal heart attack.

Mom stroked out at 67. Lived for 12 years at a full care facility. Passed away this August.

Two best experiences:

Brought some of her 3X5 recipe cards to the home and read them to her. OMG, she was so down with that. Every step of the process she was focused.

A very, very elderly woman in a wheel chair came into her room. Slowly crept over to Mom's rolling table for delivering food, etc. Snagged a micro Halloween sized Snickers off this table and I said, "Hey, You can't do that. That's my Mom's".

Elderly woman said "I hope you die"

As bizarre as it sounds, my Mom belly laughed. It was precious.

Mom had it in her living will to be put in a home somewhere and forgot about if she didn't recognize anyone. Probably because I was always there she always knew me and told me many times she appreciated me being there. Other siblings visited only occasionally. She sounded and acted very normal and alert, then after they left she would ask me who they were. Even with family photos framed and all over her bedroom walls and the most current pics on the fridge.

Remember as a kid going to visit my Mom's aunt in a home. When we showed up all these old ladies came out of the woodwork. Mom's Auntie literally beat them away with her crutches yelling that these were HER visitors and to get their own. Mom left some baked goods. We helped her hide them around in her room to "Keep those old biddies from stealing her treats."