Looking for recommendation for elder care

[cantdrv55]

My parents need help around the house now as well as transportation to/from hospital. I’m looking into Visiting Angels and Care.com. Are there any others? Has anyone here used either of these? Mom is 82, in poor health and almost completely deaf. Step Dad is 79, has Aspergers and also in poor health. They want to live in their house and will not entertain moving to assisted living facility. They have planned well financially but I still have to make sure they don’t run out of money before they pass.

[vash]

**** chris.. best of luck!!

[ckelly78z]

My inlaws are a few years from this also. My FIL is currently injured on a walker, and MIL has many ailments, and is feeble. I will follow this thread.....good luck.

[id10t]

My grandparents had long term care insurance, between that and savings/etc they were able to hire in home health care. They've been dead for 17+ years but we still hear from the 2 nurses that worked with them.

[carreradpt]

COA, Council of the Aging here on the central east coast. I have a "helper" scheduled once a week to clean the house and visit my 88yo Mom. They also have services that will transport to wherever for appts or shopping. Also a handyman service.

Cost is reasonable, by the hr, and mileage.

[john70t]

Assisted living facilities are running about $90k/yr. That will buy a lot of home nursing and chinese delivery.

I'm going through this with mom, but someone recommended Lutherans In-Home Health Care Services in Michigan – Evangelical Homes of Michigan.
Not sure where you're located but they might be able to link you to resources Home - Evangelical Lutheran Church in America
No experience.

[Don Ro]

Originally Posted by john70t

Assisted living facilities are running about $90k/yr. That will buy a lot of home nursing and chinese delivery.

I'm going through this with mom, but someone recommended Lutherans In-Home Health Care Services in Michigan – Evangelical Homes of Michigan.
Not sure where you're located but they might be able to link you to resources Home - Evangelical Lutheran Church in America
No experience.

I've been thinking lately to have a live-in person. I have a 4 bedroom home and am single.
I converted the other three bedrooms into one huge room a few years ago. French doors separating them. The person could have that "wing" free of charge and watch me drool.
I'd rather die here in my own bed...if possible.

[vinny c]

I used Senior Helpers as my wife's Alzheimer's progressed. Had a great caregiver with a sense of humor. Ran about $25. per hour plus any mileage she drove for appts & such.
You might have to sort thru caregivers to get a good match.
Best of luck.

Vince

[PorscheGAL]

Home Instead is another service you could check into.

[cantdrv55]

Thanks everyone. I’ve looked into care.com so far and have been inundated with emails from applicants. Toughest part is selecting just the right one. Hourly wage is from $15 - $25 plus travel and gas. Experience/education level is all over the place. This is going to take some time.

[RKDinOKC]

Call social services and have them checked for home care. You might be surprised what they can offer. Called a local elder care type place for my Mom and the first thing they did was send out a social worker and ended up offering basically what you said you are needing that was paid for by her social security/insurance.

[Cajundaddy]

In home health care varies a lot regionally so you will want to check with her physician and local aging centers for recommendations. My mom has pretty severe dementia, failing vision, and lived 40 miles away. Staying in her home was not really an option so we went with assisted living 1 mi from our house. Total cost right now is about $50k/yr which she can cover for a long time. Renting out her house covers about 1/2 the cost and because my dad was a vet there are care benefits available. She is reasonably happy, safe, and we spend time with her often. I expect she has 1-2 years left.

Caring for our aging parents is a difficult chapter in life.

[john70t]

Originally Posted by Cajundaddy

In home health care varies a lot regionally so you will want to check with her physician and local aging centers for recommendations.

^This.
Don't just get a single quote with one company.
(not to say "care dot com" is bad, cough 3rd party, but there might be better alternatives)
You and more importantly her will lose in the long run.

I self-programmed the names "Angelcare" and "HomeInstead" here in Michigan as positive names...but things are different everywhere.

You need to start becoming a professional now.
You need to start asking everyone: Friends. Associates. Church. Co-workers. That crack dealer. Paperboy. Girl Scouts. Cashier.
Get it all. And write that ***** down. Join a group. Talk to people.
And then go help others locally.

There is still a lot of national improvement needed in this sector.

Remember you are the final boss.
Or you should be!
Mom (who is of sound mind) should sign legal documents naming you as trustee/guardian/power of attorney.
Or she should be naming someone else she trusts.
In case she is not of sound mind, then that needs to be proven with your lawyer, her physician, the judge, and then every other utility company under the sun.
Have her make a slush fund cash account and auto-pay bills from that now.
That named person is the only person who can legally get things accomplished.
Everyone else including potentially you is probably a scammer in their eyes rightfully.

But always remember: As boss your work is never done.
Things will always get worse until it is over.
Hospice can immediately provide the extra care and comforts normal nurses can not.

Respect those few care health workers who are always doing 150% work for strangers like your family...even a little tip and smile and special extra effort makes it all right in the end.

And remember it is an emotional time.
Role reversal. Chaos. Changing accounts. Getting information. Getting more information. Death and loss is the only result.
Eventually you will need help and time off too.

[Flat Six]

I worked as a consultant for a couple of years with Home Instead Senior Care. My background is customer satisfaction/customer experience consulting, and Home Instead is one of the finest companies (in any industry) I've ever worked with. With one or two exceptions, each is a franchise and I know the application & interview process is pretty rigorous to become a franchisee. Tremendous amount of training offered for franchisees and caregivers. They're highly involved in elder care issues at the federal and state levels, and at the forefront of providing specialty in-home care for those with dementia.

YMMV, and of course you should check out your local franchisee. Even if you end up with some other provider, I'd encourage you to check out their website -- lots of great advice for those with aging parents.

I'm lucky enough to not have to need care for my parents. But if I did, I'd have no reservations about starting with Home Instead.

[A930Rocket]

Good info and timely.

My mom is 89 and doing well after my dad passed away a year ago last December, but she doesn’t want to leave the house for assisted living. It’s been home for 42 years. She’s pretty healthy and alert for her age. Knows and remembers all kinds of stuff I’ve forgotten.

We’ve all talked to her, but she’s holding firm. She has a “helper” come over twice a week to take her shopping and doc appointments. We told her no more driving a year ago.