I raced a guy on a bobcat with me on a forklift. Can’t remember who won the slow boring race!

I use my forklift to pick up spammers and stack them.

There's one now!

Put Terry down :D!

My forklift story :
We rented commercial space from a trucking company . They left us a dilapidated old propane forklift and said if we could make it run, we could use it . The ignition switch was broken, so my employee hotwired it. We would just twist the two wires together when we needed to use it . We used it like this for years . It ended up being a super useful tool, we moved cars with it, pulled motors, changed light bulbs in a 20 ft ceiling etc.
So one day I am in my office making an invoice, and I hear my employee Jay , yelling" Fred, run, get out of the office "
Dr Doofus, hotwired it , but was not sitting in it at the time, and it was in gear . It went across the shop, knocked over two shelving units, and came right through the back wall of my office . I was able to dive on and rip the wires apart before it went out the other side, and through the building .
I bought a new igntion switch that afternoon