If you have more rules, add them here

[Heel n Toe]

Just saw this on Facebook... enjoy and improve at will.



We are about to enter the BBQ season. Therefore it is important to refresh your memory on the etiquette of this sublime outdoor cooking activity . When a man volunteers to do the BBQ the following chain of events are put into motion:

(1) The woman buys the food.

(2) The woman makes the salad, prepares the vegetables, and makes dessert.

(3) The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray along with the necessary cooking utensils and sauces, and takes it to the man who is lounging beside the grill - beer in hand.

(4) The woman remains outside the compulsory three meter exclusion zone where the exuberance of testosterone and other manly bonding activities can take place without the interference of the woman.

Here comes the important part:
(5) THE MAN PLACES THE MEAT ON THE GRILL.

(6) The woman goes inside to organize the plates and cutlery.

(7) The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is looking great. He thanks her and asks if she will bring another beer while he flips the meat

Important again:
(8) THE MAN TAKES THE MEAT OFF THE GRILL AND HANDS IT TO THE WOMAN.

(9) The woman prepares the plates, salad, bread, utensils, napkins, sauces, and brings them to the table.

(10) After eating, the woman clears the table and does the dishes

And most important of all:
(11) Everyone PRAISES the MAN and THANKS HIM for his cooking efforts.

(12) The man asks the woman how she enjoyed 'her night off" and upon seeing her annoyed reaction, concludes that there's just no pleasing some women.

[Bill Douglas]

LOL

Women have it too easy.

[WPOZZZ]

Don't invite the women. A bbq is better without them cackling like hens.

[ckelly78z]

As it should be !.....know your role !

[id10t]

That picture is grilling, not BBQ

[WPOZZZ]

Don't split the hotdogs in half.

[masraum]

Originally Posted by id10t

That picture is grilling, not BBQ

Right, many/most folks that haven't been to Texas don't seem to understand the difference.

Originally Posted by WPOZZZ

Don't split the hotdogs in half.

Right, what the hell is that? So are those fat hot dogs and small burgers or big burgers and enormous hot dogs.

And this is just my preference, but no American cheese-food slices.

I had a buddy recently post that he was BBQing on facebook.
This is BBQ done right.

[Gogar]

(23) stop smashing the burgers with the spatula.

[DonDavis]

Originally Posted by id10t

That picture is grilling, not BBQ

And that's how we know a woman wrote that up.

[Flat Six]

Any rules about grilling or BBQ that don't mandate some element of beer are highly suspect . . . .

[flatbutt]

The last time I had real BBQ I burped smoke for two days. It was great!

[Zeke]

Originally Posted by id10t

That picture is grilling, not BBQ

Originally Posted by masraum

Right, many/most folks that haven't been to Texas don't seem to understand the difference.

Folks have been calling any outdoor flame cooking over a grate or grill (as some would say) BBQ since I was born. So what is the difference?

BTW, some don't differentiate between a griddle and a grill very well either.

Technically, the pic shows "grating." However, since that has another meaning, the term is not used. That's just my .02.

[fastfredracing]

One cheeseburger per park resident .

[Zeke]

I'll answer my own question. Apparently we Californians don't know smoke from fire.

From a bit of reading; BBQ = indirect heat and smoke. Grilling = cooking directly over a high heat source (with the goal of not causing a flare-up and a lot of nasty fat smoke).

So, we actually do both out here. If I may speak about primarily white CA born people, we don't know enough to understand the regional differences between preferred sauces. Most just buy it in a jar.

[id10t]

Originally Posted by Zeke

I'll answer my own question. Apparently we Californians don't know smoke from fire.

From a bit of reading; BBQ = indirect heat and smoke. Grilling = cooking directly over a high heat source (with the goal of not causing a flare-up and a lot of nasty fat smoke).

So, we actually do both out here. If I may speak about primarily white CA born people, we don't know enough to understand the regional differences between preferred sauces. Most just buy it in a jar.

Then lets add into the mix, the roasting. Whether it is a whole pig in a puero rican or cuban style box, or a pig in the ground island style, or a goat in the ground mexican style, it is again very similar to BBQ - but it isn't. It is roasting.

As for sauces - vinegar, vinegar+catsup, vinegar+mustard, catsup, mustard are the bases, and then more spices, possibly sugar, etc. added. All regional as you note...

But before the saucing gets involved... you have the rub or brine as well. Again, regional. Whole lot to it all.

[GH85Carrera]

Grilling is just grilling, and the basics are the same everywhere.

BBQ can be very different in different regions. I had some Pelicans recommend "great BBQ" in South Carolina. It might have been the most pitiful meal I ever had at a restaurant. The meat was tough as a old boot and had to use my pocket knife (REALLY) to cut it as the plastic knife they provided was not able to cut it. The sauce was vinegar based and was very sour and made my eyes water.

We have a local BBQ place that slow cooks the meat, and the brisket is so tender a fork is all you need. And the meat is juicy and need little if any sauce.

Anyone at all can cook a burger or hot dog on a grill. To do BBQ right takes a LOT of work to do it right.

[URY914]

Woman bring man cold beer.

[wdfifteen]

MrsWD has cocktails with the guests while they leave me alone to cook the meal. I like it that way. They all seem perplexed.

[Steve Carlton]

(13) Water plants and tell dog "NO" as he approaches hole in yard.

[Heel n Toe]

I agree with all the sentiments here about using the term BBQ interchangeably with GRILL or GRILL OUT.

I think it may come from some people calling a grill a "barbeque grill."

Around here most people refer to barbeque as a type of food, not an implement for cooking.

Glen, sorry you got some substandard barbeque in SC. Mustard-based is the most tasty IMO... but insofar as the texture or tenderness, it has to be cooked correctly... then it's amazing. Let me know the next time you're over this way and I'll help you hunt some down.