My wife and I had several runabout boats that didn't have big motors (140HP), but I got tired of being the captain, having to fill up my truck, and boat every trip, be responsible for everyone's safety, and entertainment, and ultimately paying for licenses, insurance, fuel, repairs, upgrades, purchase price, and storage.

I don't remember anyone contributing anything other than a cooler of drinks.

We live on a lake and we often have guests. If I invite someone (as my guest) out on the boat to go tubing, skiing, wake boarding, etc, I do not expect them to pay anything and would respectfully decline if they offered.

So, I’m guessing this guy thinks he’s been invited as your guest. He should still offer, but probably doesn’t expect you to accept. You mentioned you both belong to the same country club, so I’m guessing neither of you is pinching pennies. If you invite him as your guest, and still expect him to pay, then you should say so. It’s better than being quiet and angry over what is probably a simple misunderstanding.

You know what they say about the 2 best days of a boat owner's life. ;)

Ha! I've had one for almost a year now, paid nothing for it, have nothing in it financially, haven't put it on the water, and I'll probably have the same feeling when I get rid of it.

However, I'm holding out hope that I might come out ahead! Fancy that!

Even if I didn't want any money for gas, I would expect they would at least offer.

It depends. There are two scenarios being discussed in this thread.

One is dealing with friends, and the other with acquaintances. Expectations will not be the same.

The OP writes about an encounter with an acquaintance who is probably never going to be a friend.

Sometimes there are more....

You go boating with broke girls who don't have any pot :D

Tell him to split the gas and you will split the bait price with him.

This week a new friend invited me to a baseball game, he has season tickets.
He offered we can park 6 blocks away for free or park for $35 next to the stadium.
Yes I paid for parking and got him a hot dog and a drink at the game.

So I paid almost an equal amount as my $60 ticket value.

During the game new friend was pleased and offered he has season tickets for baseball and basketball too.

That's how you share expenses and get invited back.

True. A friend would make the offer. An acquaintance that would like to be a friend would make the offer. This guy is just there for the ride.

I put $120 into my friends boat and it moved the needle to quarter full. He said a full tank is over $400!!! And be let’s not forget the fancy direct injection 2-stroke oil at $50 per gallon.

Soul crushing. Puts boat ownership out of my realm. No thank you.

I bought my first boat when I was 20 years old. A flat bottom that would do 60 mph.

As soon as I bought it, I was told by some long time boaters: "You'll be amazed at how many friends you have".
Yeah, whatever....

I was amazed at how many friends I had!
Quite a few casual acquaintances all of a sudden acted as if we had been best friends for years. How shallow.

People that were mechanically inclined seemed to treat the boat well, and offer to help in various ways.
Others with no mechanical skill were clueless, and seemed to be just along for the fun. "Woo-Hoo! Dan is so lucky!"
....then off they trot, to go find ice cream or something.
Those were the people, that if they did offer to help, I would encourage them to go find ice cream or something, and leave me alone.

I've never had a boat that consumes huge amounts of fuel, so I generally make sure the tank is full before going out with friends so there is no need to stop at the gas dock. It avoids the debate over who pays for gas.

Boat ownership has been relatively inexpensive for me.
Only small, fairly fast & sporty boats that can sit on the trailer in the back of the airplane hangar all winter and not cost a dime.
Nothing with twin big-block V8s that suck several gallons per hour.

My boat holds 250 gal. Ethanol free gas is $4.00, so $1,000 to fill up. I don’t expect anyone to fill my tank, I just appreciate a little something to help. It gets a little over 1.5 mpg.

It was me that bought a house on a saltwater canal. I put in the dock and lift, and paid more for my boat than my plane cost. I don’t want anything from relatives or people I invite to go out in the harbor.

But I guess I do expect friends, and my wife’s friends to help with gas if they want me to take them out for the day fishing. It’s more work, wear and tear on the boat, and we may burn $300 in fuel. I guess I’m at the point that i resent taking people out that don’t do anything for me in return. All my friends chip in in some way, it’s the wife’s friends that seem not to.

I was amazed at how many friends I had after I moved to SW Florida. Especially in January and February.

wow!!! two wows!!! the 250 gallons wow, and the fact that you can get ethanol free for $4 wow!!

you keep the tank full? or you just top it off on occasion. ?

The main tank is 200 gal, the aux tank is 50 gal. I run one engine on the aux tank and the other on the main. I generally keep them full, but the aux tank is always filled back up. So when the gauge is showing I’ve used close to 100 gal I have to be ready to switch both engines to the main. But that rarely happens because I start with the aux tank full. Sometimes I’ll let the main tank get down to half tank, so I still have around 150 gal on board.

Pretty sure we just had a 'cheap' versus 'frugal' thread.

Your acquaintance is cheap. End of story. Dump the freeloader.

Around Memorial Day weekend, my GF and I spent a week in Oregon with two very close friends of mine, a married couple (I have known her for over a decade, and met him when they started dating.) He and his uncle co-own a boat; when we were planning our visit, they asked if we'd like to go out for an afternoon on the boat and go up the Columbia. We thought that sounded fantastic. We did this with another friend of theirs (and mine) who was also in town, and his aunt and uncle. IIRC we did ask if we could contribute to gas, but while we were sincere, knowing the two of them I'd have been really surprised if he'd said yes. From their perspective, we were guests who were very close friends and they wanted to help show us a great week. This was part of it. If it had been me in his position, I would have expected to pay the fuel bill myself, and considered it part of giving people I loved and cared about a great time. I think they felt the same way. You don't have the same close relationwhip with your wife's friend's husband, and I can at least in part understand your lack of interest. If a bunch of friends are all planning some special outing, then it strikes me that planning to share costs is reasonable. But for a situation where one person or a couple are invited out for a ride, I think it's reasonable for the owner to expect to pay for fuel. But it's also perfectly reasonable to say no to inviting him along.

On an earlier trip this spring, we went to LA for a week and spent a fair amount of time with a good friend of mine from engineering school, who is a pilot. He flies professionally and also has a personal plane (a Turbo Dakota). He offered to take us out in it, which we happily accepted. (Catalina was clouded in, so we flew from El Monte to Kernville for a late lunch.) He loves flying anything for any reason and will always invite visiting friends to go flying. He flies the Dakota for fun and also commuting to other airports for work (he flies for Alaska but is on furlough so doing charter work). Did the same for another friend of ours when he was there with his kids. I do have a pretty good idea of how much it costs to put a plane in the air and we offered to help with the fuel. He declined.

Must be some boating thing?
In a situation where someone *asks* you to use your boat, of course they should pay.
But if you, unsolicited, invite people to go out on your boat as guests, I can’t see asking them or expecting them to pay for gas.
I know it costs money, but hosting anything costs money. If you have a dinner party at your house and spend $1000, do you asks your guests to chip in?
Again, if it’s some boating specific etiquette, I guess that’s different, as long as the guest knows he’s supposed to offer to pay for gas.

Yes we did.
I know if I had a boat and I invited people on it, I’d feel like a cheap azz asking or expecting them to pay for gas.

Lookin to visit SW FL this fall. Need a ride from there to Havana. My car gets 40mpg...so I figure a little over 200 miles @ 40mpg is 50gals.
I could pay you 25 galX$3 or $75 for the trip...because you would be on the boat also.

Let me know. :D

Well I look at it a little differently, you don't get to drive the boat so the gas thing is not a big deal for me.
But you should pay for all the beer, snacks, lunch and offer to help wipe/wash it down if you want to be invited again.

Once, sure. How many times before he should at least offer? Or help clean up? The guy's an oblivious dick.

Sorry, these excuses don't fly. The OP says he has owned a boat in the past. I will grant you that he is not obligated to pay anything since you invited him but the right thing to do is offer. This guy probably has 'alligator arms' when they go out to dinner and the check shows up.

I say cut him out. It bothers you that he is selfish and there is no reason for you to pay for the day and be miserable. I think telling your wife is a great idea. He will get the news. That said, I still wouldn't invite him. If he asks to go, I'd be blunt: "I've paid for the last few trips so how about you pay for the fuel this trip and bring a cooler of something to enjoy?". If he agrees let him pay the full price. If he is offended, have a nice life.

I've always had a personal rule when invited on a boat. Chip in for gas and never show up empty handed.

Sorry, I'm spending the day with my son, we don't get much time together.

End of story.

The question is...how many boat owners set out with..."how can I recoup my gas costs?"
If you can't accommodate a friend...why have the boat?

I’m going out tomorrow and it will just be my son and I. Of coarse I don’t expect my son to pay, but I do expect him to clean the fish and help with the boat. Or he won’t be going again either. He always does, and more.

My wife said her friends husband does nothing, if a light bulb needs changing they have a handyman over. The boat he had was to much trouble because he did did not want to do anything himself. He had a dock and lift, but paid to have it taken care of somewhere else. They would put it in the water for him and then clean it and flush when he was done. He just paid for it.

He’s a lawyer, for what it worth. I guess he never had to get his hands dirty. He’s really not that bad a guy. But it’s not for me to entertain him.

This guy is not really my friend, it’s my wife’s friends husband. I’ve taken the guy several times, he knows what it cost, and that there is things to do when you get back. I guess I didn’t buy the boat to take my wife’s friends out.

And my friends always offer to help out, at least help with the boat, or take me out on theirs. I’d feel like a mooch if I was always going out on someone’s boat and didn’t offer something.

I think since your inviting him he doesnt owe you anything. You ask a girl on a date and expect her to pay half? He is not your friend. Your wife can take him somewhere if she likes him that much

Friends don't let friends pay for everything without offering to chip in.
He is the mooch husband of a friend of his wife.

Also, wifey needs to know so that this doesn't come back to haunt him again.

Just stop by and pick me up. You could just drop me off at Key West. Maybe you can get someone from there to take you to Havana. Unless your able to stop on the way back I’d have to deduct the cost of my return trip.

When are you coming by?

I agree, he doesn’t owe me anything. I’m just not taking him again.

It’s like you ask a girl out on a date and her brother showed up instead. Do you pay for his dinner? More than once?

https://media.giphy.com/media/TJshh7...PI6Q/giphy.gif

Thanks for the thoughts, I do see both sides.

It just bothers me with this guy, and the easy way is I don’t take him again. The wife says it puts her in a uncomfortable position, but knows why.

I was curious how others thought about it and if I was out of line.

No offense but that comment makes her seem very selfish.

Also disrespectful to you.

Sorry....I don't know what else to say.

I'm pretty sure after reading his posts here that if the OP was hosting a friend, he would turn down offers of money but probably accept the help putting the boat and gear away.

OP's acquaintance on the other hand, offered nothing, just a pair of heels when the fun was over - and more than once.

This guy failed the audition for friendship.

He’s a lawyer? Fish bait ! Do us all a favor.
Tim

What do they call a lawyer at the bottom of the ocean?

A good start . . . .