Men who cannot change a tire

[rusnak]

Originally Posted by red-beard

My wife took the BMW to get the oil changed. This is a 2011 with sensors for EVERYTHING. 45,000 miles.

The recommendations came back:

Need brakes and rotors all around
Change all the belts (6 years old, good idea)
Need a new (single) glow plug, but let's change them all
One control arm bushing
Alignment
Engine Air Filter

Total: around $3K

Total scam. The brakes have pad sensors and none are activated. The rotors should be able to be turned at least once.

Also need to change the brake fluid. I take it those are diesel? All of those items sound in line with the mileage except for the suspension bushing. That's weird.

[DaveE]

I got a flat in my VW Beetle ages ago. I was jumping on the damn lug wrench trying to get the bolts loose. I finally called a tow truck and this big guy (I only weighed maybe 130 back then) couldn't get them loose either! He had to tow it back to the shop so they could use an impact. That said, I recently mounted my own motorcycle tires.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[red-beard]

Originally Posted by Gretch

what model beemer?

I have a 2007 335xi. Brake pads went 60k + without scuffing sensors. I changed them out myself. Took about an hour (all 4 wheels) Rotors were fine. cost was under $200.

X5. Oh, it is a rip-off! I'll be doing it myself using parts purchased from our HOST! I'll take the wheels off this weekend and look at everything. I'm just incensed that this "mechanic" was trying to take advantage of my wife. The shop was very good with our 2000 X5. I think the ownership changed between 2011 and now.

[scottmandue]

Originally Posted by wildthing

I'm all for changing oil myself but the disposal hassle kills it for me. I'd rather pay someone to dispose of it properly.

Around here Autozone and O'Riley will dump your oil for free.

I fear changing a tire is becoming a lost art what with more manufactures going with run flat tires and other work arounds to cut corners.

Wife claims there is no spare in her Mazda and calls AAA to tow her to the nearest tire shop... one of these days I am going to peak in the trunk.

Ahem... Checked the online owners manual PDF and what do I see

[Gretch]

Originally Posted by red-beard

I'll be doing it myself using parts purchased from our HOST!

same supplier I use................ awesome service!!!!!!!

[911 Rod]

I came very close to meeting my death on the side of the highway last year.
Had a flat on the rear on my TT and pulled to side almost 2 car widths from the traffic. Some asshat in a tow truck saw the car and decided to pull off at speed and pull in front of me. By the the time he saw me crouched at the rear wheel, there was traffic beside him and had no choice than to rip by 2 ft away from me as he couldn't slow down. I admit I thought about it for a long time after.

[rcecale]

Does this count?

Few years ago, my 23 yr old (at the time) step-son called, crying that his Toyota Camry was on fire! He couldn't see any flames, but there was a LOT of "smoke" coming from that "big, square-like thing at the front of the engine...the thing with all the vents all over it...!"

It went downhill from there...

Randy

[sammyg2]

Can't resist:

I used to work down the street from Norwalk hospital, one of the largest psychiatric facilities in the state. It is enclosed by an 8' high chain link fence and topped with barbed wire, it was a huge campus. Many of the patients were allowed outside privileges and were allowed to be outside, under trees and free to use the picnic benches or just to wonder around.

Even though it was fenced, I still thought it was pretty spooky.

Late one afternoon I was driving down the western side of the hospital and had a flat tire. Norwalk Boulevard is a large, 4-lane surface street with just enough room to park a car on each side of the road.

I pulled to the curb, waited for the traffic to thin and got out of the car. My left rear tire was flat.

It was going to be an anxious operation with my back turned to the traffic, and it was compounded by one of the patients walking around and preaching to the birds - weird even.

I got the jack and the spare out of the back and popped the hubcap. I put the lug nuts into the hubcap to keep them all together and jacked up the car.

Just as I had done that, I heard a voice say, "What'cha doin' mister?" I looked up and this guy in gray shirt and pants was kind of hanging on the fence and looking at me - obviously one of the patients with his eyes wide open and sort of slack-jawed.

I told him, "Ummm, I'm changing a tire", trying not to look at him too closely.

He then asked, "Mister, why are you changing your tire?"

"Because it's flat, that's why. Don't bother me," I snapped.

"OK".

The afternoon traffic had started building, and like most California traffic, the posted 45 MPH speed limit kept the traffic down to about 55 MPH.

I removed the tire and, as my Dad had taught me, placed the flat tire under the middle part of the car in case the jack failed. I wheeled the spare around and had just mounted it when a large truck honked it's air-horn and passed so close to me that not only could I feel the air pressure, but I saw the side view mirror go by just inches over my head.

In addition to nearly scaring the psis out of me, the suction of the truck captured my hubcap in its wake and scattered the lug nuts everywhere.

When my heart quit beating like it was going to jump out of my chest, I went looking for the hub cap and the lug nuts. I found the hubcap about a quarter of a mile down the road, but not a single lug nut.

I walked back to the car, trying to think of the best way to get some help - remember, this was back before cell phones. I tried to remember if there was a full service gas station around, and where it was. I was also trying to remember if there was a telephone booth close. I must have been muttering some choice words, because the man behind the fence asked, "What's the matter, mister. You're using a lot of naughty words."

Almost blowing my cork, and with smoke coming out of my ears, I started to answer in a not pleasant manner. Somehow I contained my hot temper. After all, it wasn't his fault, and I explained what happened.

He said, "Well, mister, that doesn't seem too much of a problem". I was flabbergasted and thought, "I know why this guy is in the hospital, he doesn't have a single touch with really".

I answered, rather sarcastically, "Oh really. Just how would you solve this problem"?

He asked, "Do you have a lug nut or butterfly nut to keep your spare in place"?

I answered, "Of course, but what has that got to do with anything", so he explained.

"Take one lug nut off of each tire and use the butterfly to tighten on another post. That way, you'll have four nuts on each tire, and if you drive slow, you can get to a gas station and I bet you could buy a set of lug nuts from them."

My eyes snapped wide open, and I said, "That's brilliant. You're too smart to be in the hospital. Can I tell someone how smart you are and maybe get you out of the hospital?"

"Nope", he said. "I really am crazy, but I'm not Stupid!"

Yes I worked down the street from Norwalk hospital, but no that didn't really happen to me. Good story tho .......

[Hugh R]

When I first started dating my now wife of 34 years for xmas I got her a couple of road flares and a 3 or 4 D cell Maglight, and mace for her car, she thought it was weird, until I told her I cared about her.

When my daughter turned 16 I bought her a 1 year old Toyota Echo and did the same thing, I also made here learn how to change a tire, she thought I was being a stupid Dad, until she needed to change a tire about a year later, she had triple A, but where she got the flat, no cell service.

Edit: a friend of mine's adult daughter seized the engine on her 10 y/o mercedes something or other. Her Dad talked to her about if any warning lights had come on, and she said "Yeah the one that looks like a gravy boat came on a few months ago".....

[Gretch]

Originally Posted by rcecale

Does this count?

Few years ago, my 23 yr old (at the time) step-son called, crying that his Toyota Camry was on fire! He couldn't see any flames, but there was a LOT of "smoke" coming from that "big, square-like thing at the front of the engine...the thing with all the vents all over it...!"

It went downhill from there...

Randy

your only saving grace is he wern't blood kin. Man is that pitiful. pajama boi?

[Bob Kontak]

Originally Posted by Hugh R

"Yeah the one that looks like a gravy boat came on a few months ago".....

That is precious.

Got a call from Betty today. 72 year old retiree from Goodyear Aerospace. She brings sandwiches and casseroles to my shop because I fix her car cheap.

On topic, Betty says, I got like 9 dash lights on, I'm in Raleigh, NC heading to Akron and I looked at the owners manual and I think my brake fluid is low.

I am on the phone while she opens hood and finds the MC reservoir. "It's like an inch down from low. It says DOT 3 or 4 is ok"

I say, God damn Betty, you are the boss. She is cruising home right now with no trouble lights after topping off.

[john70t]

Originally Posted by javadog

There are arguments for replacing the pads before they get down to their minimums, but how and where the car is driven has a bearing on that.

Brake dust builds up around the rocking square seal..
Attracts moisture and pitting in caliper bore..
Which damages seal when pads wear, and piston extends, and seal travels over pits..
???

[Tervuren]

The only tires I have ever changed where bicycle tires.

I've never changed a tire on any of my cars. I've put different wheel/tire sets on and off, but never removed a tire from the wheel and replaced with a different tire.

I figure the nice balancing machines involved in the process when I take my wheels/tires to a shop, especially the new road force ones, will get a much better result than if I change the tire myself.

[Craig T]

Originally Posted by Hugh R

Edit: a friend of mine's adult daughter seized the engine on her 10 y/o mercedes something or other. Her Dad talked to her about if any warning lights had come on, and she said "Yeah the one that looks like a gravy boat came on a few months ago".....

My wife did the same thing in her 997. I hardly ever drove it (Tiptronic ). One Saturday I noticed it was filthy so I took it down to get it washed for her. I got in and the oil light was on. I warmed it up and checked the oil and it was critically low, like three quarts down. I went back in angrily and asked how long the oil lights been on. She calmly said "I don't know. Isn't it just a warning light anyway. I figured it would tell me if I needed to add oil". Clueless.

[arcsine]

My daughter is starting to learn to drive now. I have promised her that she will know how to change a tire, check and maintain all the fluids and replace burnt lights BEFORE she ever gets her license. Having AAA is fine and good but you have to take some responsibility.

[john70t]

Originally Posted by scottmandue

Around here Autozone and O'Riley will dump your oil for free.

I use a 5gal square container made for restaurant oil I think. Similar to a milk jug but thicker.
It has a large mouth cap with a top handle just in case.
Placed in cardboard box to soak up drips. Inside a milk crate everything fits tight.
Easy to carry and pour. Doesn't tip over. Relatively sanitary.

[Jrboulder]

Here in Arizona it's gotten so bad the state troopers have service trucks and drive around helping (mostly) clueless motorists. It's probably saved several lives by now.

Personally, I find it far easier and faster to do most work myself. I'm pretty sure I have free spare tire installation through my insurance but waiting for the guy to show up or waiting for a 2 hour oil change really isn't that appealing.

[motion]

A few years ago my son had a friend up to our place in Montana for a month or so. While out on a camping trip, I taught them both how to change the tire on my F150. They weren't very interested, but I'm hoping that some of it sunk in. Or, at least gave them the confidence to know that its possible.

[Tidybuoy]

I have a nephew that is a transvestite. I doubt he could even start a lawn mower and I know that he wouldn't even know what a spare tire is.

[Jolly Amaranto]

My steam locomotive has steel tires. You have to heat them up to slip them onto the wheels.