[berettafan]

People change I guess. Maybe I had a part in it too. Very good friend and neighbor for almost 20 years. kids played ball together, ran around the neighborhood. Frequent cookouts/crab feasts/drinking visits. about 4 years ago a new coach came to the HS our kids attended. Before he even had his suitcase unpacked my buddy was inviting him fishing, to cookouts, etc. Why? Because the guy was supposed to revitalize one of the sports programs and buddies kid is pretty darned talented in that realm. Program doing great, lots of wins, buddies kid gets tons of college offers and all is well. As a coach the guy is fantastic. As a person he's a neanderthal. He is my replacement it seems.

I could go along and get along but I guess I just don't have it in me to pretend to like this guy as a person (again, great coach. coached my kid and I have zero complaints on that part). But having seen the blatant ass kissing that ensued by multiple families including my buddies it just makes me sick to be around it. In retrospect I've seen a few families come and go as paths crossed in sports (always that was the common thread) but ours and one other were a constant. Now more often than not if I get a call or text it's related to spending money on a boat we own together. Three of us used to fish and crab together all the time. I don't recall the last time that happened and any invites feel more like he's checking off a box rather than 'hey let's have some fun together'. Cornhole boards come out and we all played. Then it was 'hey can you get your boards' but no 'which team do you want to be on'. His wife was finally smart enough to get him his own boards to avoid that little bit of awkwardness. I ****ing hate it. Got the invite to crab today but nothing this evening to eat. Neighbor who went with him to crab got the invite to eat. Neighbor texts me 'where are you' I'm like 'hey he didn't tell me'. 'oh he did you must've missed it'. 'Nope, didn't get anything'. Coach is there. That is why I didn't get the invite. My buddy can be pretty oblivious to people's feelings and such but his wife is not. I'm guessing she can tell what my opinion of that relationship is and would rather not have me around to be reminded of that opinion (not that I'd ever voice it to either of them).

Maybe I'm being a whiny ***** with this. We drank too much so maybe this is a good thing. Maybe it's time to move on and grow up. I had a fantastic time with this guy for so many years. Closest friend I ever had really. But I also saw another buddy of his get left out because nobody liked the guy's wife. Questions avoided, texts 'missed', delayed responses, etc. When you don't get the call it's not an accident.

So that's my ****ty Monday story. It's been a long time brewing in my mind and I figure I might as well get it out before it stresses me into bad health or something. I think most folks would fake it with the new guy and just be fine but I'm frankly tired of being treated like a business partner in a boat or a yard games equipment supplier or a hired hand for crabbing so the latest and greatest can eat crabs. My buddy is a good guy, he really is, and maybe I've ****ed up in thinking and typing all this but dammit I can only ignore what I truly believe for so long.

Hope you all are having a better Monday than me. I should've been enjoying the low humidity and nice breeze on a patio with a 12 pack and bushel of crabs tonight instead of whining like a high school girl. And yet here I am. If this is what self respect is I'm not terribly thrilled with it. if it is just stupidity and selfishness well I am fairly practiced in that and shouldn't be surprised. Either way I'm glad you guys are here to listen (or at least skim a few sentences and tell me to quit being stupid).