Quote:
Originally Posted by Isabo
I'm the mother of a very tattooed daughter. She got the first at 14, I saw it when she was 15. The art gallery has kept growing over the years. She was clever enough as a teen to NOT mention it to me beforehand. I think your wife's reaction was the wisest, I think your position is much harder, because of their age and your stepdad status I would suggest saying how you feel, WITHOUT GOING OVER THE TOP, and backing up the position your wife took. I'd also talk to your wife about how to react when the next tattoo appears.   As an aside my tattooed biker chick daughter went berserk when her lawyer boyfriend tattooed her name on his arm, he had it removed very quickly afterwards. |
Thank you for the mother's perspective, Isa.
I've sat here and thought about what my core issue is and have come up with two things: 1) I consider it a sign of disrespect for her mother who specifically said "No, once you're 18 you can if you wish but I still don't approve."
and 2) I hate the fact that I'm expected to be dad for all the heavy lifting but find they are repeatedly concealing things from me that I subsequently discover. I consider much of their behaviour as lying by ommission. To that end, I react maturely and calmly when I'm in the loop...e.g., when I (not their mother) discovered they were becoming sexually active I immediately discussed with their mother and arranged for BC without going ballistic.