My mother passed away and I’m the trustee. Where do I start to manage their affairs?

cantdrv55 · 07-03-2018, 08:19 PM

I’ve already contacted their attorney and have an appointment to go over her will. Who else should I contact? Social security? We buried my mom today. I lost one of my heroes and I’m sad.

RANDY P · RANDY P's Garage

I'm sorry for your loss.

rjp

Don Ro · 07-03-2018, 08:24 PM

I could mumble a few things about what to do, but I'd just say to pay attention to your attorney.
.
It's hard to lose a parent, I know. You obviously were close to yours.
Give yourself permission to feel as badly as you do...grieving is healing.
Best,

legion · 07-03-2018, 08:47 PM

The specific steps vary greatly based on the size of the estate, how complicated it is to administer, and the state of residence.

My dad died 12 years ago, he was essentially indigent, owed way more than he had, had few heirs, very little in liquid assets, and lived in Tennessee. It still took me a year of court dates to resolve everything.

Talk with the lawyer, it will be worth more than the speculation we can give you. Your state laws may require very different procedures than what any of us have experienced.

cantdrv55 · 07-03-2018, 08:49 PM

Thank you guys.

Bill Douglas · 07-03-2018, 09:08 PM

Sorry to hear this. Very sad.

WPOZZZ · 07-03-2018, 09:38 PM

Condolences. Just work with her attorney. You'll need to order a bunch of death certificates to send to the various banks, utilities, insurance cos...

cantdrv55 · 07-03-2018, 10:54 PM

I worked with the funeral director for the death certificates. He recommended getting 3 only as financial institutions will make a copy and give me back the original.

Arizona_928 · 07-03-2018, 11:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cantdrv55

I worked with the funeral director for the death certificates. He recommended getting 3 only as financial institutions will make a copy and give me back the original.

But it takes time to get those back. Especially if she had investments with banks that aren't local.

cantdrv55 · 07-04-2018, 12:13 AM

Good point

Bill Douglas · 07-04-2018, 12:18 AM

I know it sounds painful but contact organisations she does business with and tell them to close accounts, tell the dentist - no reminders. If she lived alone make sure her house doesn't burgled. I've been through all this myself.

cantdrv55 · 07-04-2018, 12:59 AM

There is so much to do!!

Thanks everyone.

WPOZZZ · 07-04-2018, 01:38 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cantdrv55

I worked with the funeral director for the death certificates. He recommended getting 3 only as financial institutions will make a copy and give me back the original.

Quote:

Originally Posted by AZ_porschekid

But it takes time to get those back. Especially if she had investments with banks that aren't local.

When my aunt and my grandmother passed, I ordered 20 death certificates, and used almost all of them. Better to have extras, than to have to order more.

drcoastline · 07-04-2018, 03:09 AM

My condolences. There is plenty of time to get things done. Take a few days and be with your family.

You will need to make an inventory of assets with values House, bank accounts, stocks, car, etc., and creditors credit cards, mortgage, car loan, cable, electric, gas, phone company, etc. to give to the attorney in order to probate the estate. The assets will need to move out of your mothers name to the rightful heirs. Creditors will need to get paid and the accounts closed. I agree you need more than three death certificates. I recently probated my uncles estate, I had three full DC's and six partial I used everyone. While you have been named in the will as the executor some states need to approve you as the representative of the estate (FL) that takes a few weeks.

One issue I had with my uncles estate was closing a bank account that had my uncle and his ex-wife's names on it. She pre-deceased him. The bank account had the same last name but after the divorce she went back to her maiden name. I had a very difficult time getting a DC from the state of California as I had very limited information on her and getting the bank to accept it as the names didn't match. Also be forewarned any bank account that has multiple names on it even as a signor, the survivors on that account automatically get the money in the account. You will need to have the survivor on the account close the account.

But again, take a few days for yourself the estate can wait and the attorney will guide you.

Best of luck.

rfuerst911sc · 07-04-2018, 03:29 AM

Been there sorry for your loss . Get at least 10 - 12 copies of the death certificate as everyone needs proof as you go through the process of closing/stopping accounts .

wdfifteen · wdfifteen's Garage

I am sorry for your loss. It can seem like everything is happening at once, but there is time to take care of it all. Spend some time honoring her life and worry about the business stuff in a week or so.
One mistake that I made was to close Mom's checking account a month or so after her death. She was still getting random refunds from insurance companies, etc for months. Keep her checking account open for a year.

masraum · 07-04-2018, 05:15 AM

My condolences. I'm not looking forward to the day. I hope to have some time still.

mreid · 07-04-2018, 05:15 AM

First off, you have my condolences. My MIL passed suddenly about a month ago. It is a very difficult time and you need to focus on family.

Are you the trustee or executor? This is important. If you are truly the trustee (her assets are assigned to a trust), you will need a good probate attorney and they will guide you through the process. Otherwise, her will is hopefully pretty clear and an estate attorney can help you through your role.

All the best in your handling of her assets!

Don Ro · 05:22 AM

^^^
Why would he need a probate attorney if he might be the trustee? Don't trusts spell out what's what?
Isn't that the point of a trust...to avoid probate/attorney?
Not being an ass, just curious.

stomachmonkey · 07-04-2018, 05:21 AM

Sorry for your loss.

Listen to your attorney.

Visit the bank and meet with the manager. Get them on your team.

Shut down lines of credit, you never know who has her card on file, like one of her Dr's, who will charge the card for a missed appointment, an appointment she missed because she died the morning of the appointment and the Dr's office manager insists you should have called right away to cancel as if that would have been the first thing on your mind had you even known about the appointment to begin with.

Get more than 3 death certificates, you'll end up using them. I got a dozen, still have a couple for the odd things that pop up years later.

Don't let creditors bully you into resolving things outside your timeframe / comfort zone. Threats of "it will hurt his credit rating" will be thrown around, simply respond, "he does not care, he's got bigger problems, he's dead".

Again, my condolences.