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-   -   Being poor is very expensive. (http://forums.pelicanparts.com/off-topic-discussions/1099903-being-poor-very-expensive.html)

Rick Lee 08-14-2021 08:18 AM

The people I deal with are largely incapable of applying for SSDI on their own. However, getting denied the first time makes it easier for a law firm to then take over and start the process again. I met one last week who lived in a pretty decent apt complex. Her place was neat, well decorated and she was super pleasant, hair done, dressed up, you know, self-respect kind of stuff. She had gotten laid off during the Covid shutdown, the various benefits are drying up now and she just doesn't want to go back into the rat race. She's 55 and applying for SSDI. I didn't want to try to warn her off or spend the time that conversation would have eaten up. But she's right at that tipping point. Door #1 is go back to some kind of work with dignity and chance for advancement. Door #2 is lifetime of gov't. subsistence checks that will never outpace inflation.

aschen 08-14-2021 08:29 AM

Plenty of working professionals are terrible with money and are trchnically broke as well

People who earn 80k a year, have 2 45k cars, call a plumber everytime the toilet runs, use lawnmower service, only eat organic food from whole foods etc. Must be stressful of living paycheck to paycheck

svandamme 08-14-2021 08:32 AM

My sister is mentally slow, she works in an sheltered workplace
when i returned from abroad (6 years no contact with family) she was in debt, mother hadn't helped her..

One thing I did, was get her to fix her own problems
eg, I didn't throw money at her problems
I didn't buy her things

That's what got her in trouble in the first place because that's what my mother does.. throw money and things.

In 6 months she had payed off her debt , felt good about her self, and bought some life improving things like a dishwasher.. But I made her buy everything herself ,with her own earnings because I wanted her to be proud of her achievement, and take care of it afterward. Builds self confidence.

It takes a huge amount of effort to rebuild somebody who isn't smart enough to reinvent his or herself.
And that's another problem with poverty..
It's often said by people who are well off, that the poor should just apply themselves more.
But it's really not that easy

Studies have shown that twins, raised separately , one in rich , one in poor circumstances
despite biologically same at the start, will develop to having a higher and lower IQ respectively
https://www.jstor.org/stable/40063922
there are others, this is just first one that comes up now

So being poor makes people grow up less smart

Rick Lee 08-14-2021 08:33 AM

People who work and earn a good living but who overextend themselves are a whole different demographic than what I deal with. Those folks may not have much net worth, but they have jobs, healthy incomes, probably some retirement savings and they will stay working for a long time. The people I deal with, when it comes to life decisions, they got it wrong every single time. Hell, I get some of them wrong, but I try to make the right decision. These folks never get it right. Live like that for 50+ years and the bad decisions start to catch up with you.

RANDY P 08-14-2021 08:34 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rick Lee (Post 11424539)
The people I deal with are largely incapable of applying for SSDI on their own. However, getting denied the first time makes it easier for a law firm to then take over and start the process again. I met one last week who lived in a pretty decent apt complex. Her place was neat, well decorated and she was super pleasant, hair done, dressed up, you know, self-respect kind of stuff. She had gotten laid off during the Covid shutdown, the various benefits are drying up now and she just doesn't want to go back into the rat race. She's 55 and applying for SSDI.

A 55 y/o trying to re-enter the workplace is a problem in itself. Age discrimination is out there, just disguised as 'cultural fit'.

rjp

Rick Lee 08-14-2021 08:35 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RANDY P (Post 11424562)
A 55 y/o trying to re-enter the workplace is a problem in itself. Age discrimination is out there, just disguised as 'cultural fit'.

rjp

I agree. She's not going to jump right back into the level of professional job she got laid off from. But even a min. wage job pays more than SSDI and you can always look for a better one.

aschen 08-14-2021 08:41 AM

Best way to ensure success in life is to choose your parents wisely both for genetics and environmental

Unfortunately a challenging proposition for kids but gives me hope as a parent

fintstone 08-14-2021 09:05 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RANDY P (Post 11424562)
A 55 y/o trying to re-enter the workplace is a problem in itself. Age discrimination is out there, just disguised as 'cultural fit'.

rjp

Yes. That is one reason that I have hesitated to retire. Leaving at the peak of your profession and your peak earning years is tough knowing that if you later decide you want to go back to work (for money or just because you miss it), you will likely do so at far less pay/responsibility.

RANDY P 08-14-2021 09:26 AM

Interviewing while older in a tech company has been something I have given up on (Amazon most recently- did the loop, twice- Yuck) I won't try it anymore. Thank God I landed where I did- a foreign bank with ZERO kids.

GF is a 45 y/o HR VP laid off in 2019- all the accolades in the world, prestigious prev. employers, high profile references, etc. etc I have listened to her screening calls over and over, final interviews etc. etc, always strong, gets good conversation going- then nothing. Been 2 years.

Always a stupid reason she lost it, sometimes it's comical. Only thing I can ascertain is age.

rjp

brp914 08-14-2021 10:00 AM

This is slightly off-topic. Abusive towing companies that tow poor people's cars over trivial things, then charge them onerous fines and abusive treatment to boot. If you haven't seen this sheriff in action you're in for a treat. His descriptions really capture your attention. I've seen a number of them and they are excellent. In this one, a guy goes to collect his car from impound, he pays his fines, gets abused, loses it, and ends up killed.

<iframe width="560" height="315" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/fxWsiSh_ccA" title="YouTube video player" frameborder="0" allow="accelerometer; autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture" allowfullscreen></iframe>

RANDY P 08-14-2021 10:33 AM

I believe the situation for being poor will only get worse- there's no stigma or penalty anymore for being poor. They are also comfortable with fortunes changing week to week.

Life's comfortable enough when you have wal-mart, easy finance, endless cheap chain restaurants, weed and video games to placate you.

It seems to be more the norm than it used to be.

Disclosure: most of my cousins on my Mom's side are exactly this way- they always ask how I get to doing what I do and when I describe

1)- focus on work
2)-education
3)-try to earn more, money isn't everything but it's close.

-they tune out. The ghetto mentality is ingrained and those three things I mentioned are strictly taboo. I straight up told 'em all they're a drain on my aunts and uncles, and they need to get their $**t together. I then told my aunts I tried- so cut them all off. My cousin's endless refusal to support themselves and grow will bankrupt my aunts eventually..

Rick Lee 08-14-2021 10:38 AM

It's so generational and cultural, not caused by economics. So many neighborhoods here have what were probably once decent houses. But the owners park several derelict cars in the front yard, use a blue tarp for a sun visor, leave dog schit everywhere and other garbage in the yard. It does not take money at all to clean up your yard or make the front of your property look somewhat presentable. You don't need money to not store water heaters, transmissions and bathtubs in your yard. As much as I hate the idea of HOAs, the are not too many non-HOA neighborhoods without some or many total slob renters or homeowners.

Bill Douglas 08-14-2021 11:21 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by brp914 (Post 11424658)
This is slightly off-topic. Abusive towing companies that tow poor people's cars over trivial things

It can go the other way. the 911 got towed. My fault, that wasn't the point. But I paid. got the car and started to drive off. One of the trash people working there thought he'd show off to the others by giving the posh in the expensive suit some grief. He didn't know I'd spent something like 15 years as a boxer/kick boxer. So I blocked a couple of punches (so it was self defence) then beat the living daylights out of him on the side of the road. The suit was fine, in fact I still have it.

Racerbvd 08-14-2021 11:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RANDY P (Post 11424687)
I believe the situation for being poor will only get worse- there's no stigma or penalty anymore for being poor. They are also comfortable with fortunes changing week to week.

Life's comfortable enough when you have wal-mart, easy finance, endless cheap chain restaurants, weed and video games to placate you.

It seems to be more the norm than it used to be.

Disclosure: most of my cousins on my Mom's side are exactly this way- they always ask how I get to doing what I do and when I describe

1)- focus on work
2)-education
3)-try to earn more, money isn't everything but it's close.

-they tune out. The ghetto mentality is ingrained and those three things I mentioned are strictly taboo. I straight up told 'em all they're a drain on my aunts and uncles, and they need to get their $**t together. I then told my aunts I tried- so cut them all off. My cousin's endless refusal to support themselves and grow will bankrupt my aunts eventually..

Yep, people use to be embarrassed to have food stamps and government assistance, now it is a goal. It is very clear that people's standards have tremendously dropped.
Now people are being brainwashed that they "deserve " X amount of money no matter what the job. Minimum wage was never meant to be anything but a starting point, from there you work your way up. I remember as a kid, Mr Fetzer, who owned Lake Shore Schwinn (family still owns it, but no longer Schwinn) when I started working, I earned $3.35 an hour. Now I was only at that rate a short time as I was motivated. I remember asking Mr Fetzer what it would take to earn more money, his answer was very simple [QUOTE]make yourself worth more money[/QUOTE]
So I went from fixing flats, to repairing to building new bikes, when the new product lines would come out, I would educate myself so I could work on the sales floor, ect. I learned a lot from him, and not just about bikes, but business and ethics and more.
His words are just as true today as they were in the early 80s.

ckelly78z 08-14-2021 11:38 AM

I know many "working poor" folks who all drive nicer cars than me (the never ending lease loop), wear designer insignia clothes, get their starbux every morning, drink Monster energy drinks all day, smoke a pack plus of cigs, and spend the remainder of their money on tattoos. They are always complaining about money, and always play the victim. Some of these folks are my age (56), and haven't started thinking about retirement yet. I have heard a few of them bragging about the credit card roulette they play with paying their bills, and it saddens me.

Racerbvd 08-14-2021 12:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ckelly78z (Post 11424739)
I know many "working poor" folks who all drive nicer cars than me (the never ending lease loop), wear designer insignia clothes, get their starbux every morning, drink Monster energy drinks all day, smoke a pack plus of cigs, and spend the remainder of their money on tattoos. They are always complaining about money, and always play the victim. Some of these folks are my age (56), and haven't started thinking about retirement yet. I have heard a few of them bragging about the credit card roulette they play with paying their bills, and it saddens me.

I remember sitting at a friend's bar, enjoying happy hour and this woman sitting a few seats away *****ing that she had medication at the pharmacy and whining that she didn't have the money to pay for it. Yet, she was sitting in a bar, drinking and smoking cigarettes, yea no money for medication but money to drink and smoke..:o:mad:
As I have said over and over, life is about choices, your personal choices.. Like others here, I have gone without things, hell I never bothered to buy TV until the last 10 years, went without cable for ever.

Ctopher 08-14-2021 12:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RANDY P (Post 11424620)
Interviewing while older in a tech company has been something I have given up on (Amazon most recently- did the loop, twice- Yuck) I won't try it anymore. Thank God I landed where I did- a foreign bank with ZERO kids.

GF is a 45 y/o HR VP laid off in 2019- all the accolades in the world, prestigious prev. employers, high profile references, etc. etc I have listened to her screening calls over and over, final interviews etc. etc, always strong, gets good conversation going- then nothing. Been 2 years.

Always a stupid reason she lost it, sometimes it's comical. Only thing I can ascertain is age.

rjp

I feel like I’m the same boat as your GF. I’m 46 years old, soon to be 47 at end of month and was part of work force reduction at a major computer company after being there 23yrs. I’ve had trouble just getting interviews for jobs that was perfectly qualified or even over qualified for. It’s been hard and after 2yrs and 6 months I received my first job offer and looking forward to start working again very soon.

CTopher

Por_sha911 08-14-2021 12:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pwd72s (Post 11423517)
This thread points to a crying need for high schools to teach basic money management skills.

But who am I kidding? Oregon's governor just signed a bill eliminating basic reading, writing, and math skills as a requirement for a high school diploma.

But you have to take a CRT class to graduate?

Por_sha911 08-14-2021 01:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by aschen (Post 11424553)
Plenty of working professionals are terrible with money and are trchnically broke as well

People who earn 80k a year, have 2 45k cars, call a plumber everytime the toilet runs, use lawnmower service, only eat organic food from whole foods etc. Must be stressful of living paycheck to paycheck

And our leaders want to do this to the entire country by saddling us the trillions in debt for their social agenda programs.

gorthar 08-14-2021 01:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by brp914 (Post 11424658)
This is slightly off-topic. Abusive towing companies that tow poor people's cars over trivial things, then charge them onerous fines and abusive treatment to boot. If you haven't seen this sheriff in action you're in for a treat. His descriptions really capture your attention. I've seen a number of them and they are excellent. In this one, a guy goes to collect his car from impound, he pays his fines, gets abused, loses it, and ends up killed.

<iframe width="560" height="315" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/fxWsiSh_ccA" title="YouTube video player" frameborder="0" allow="accelerometer; autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture" allowfullscreen></iframe>

Thanks for sharing this. Had never heard of him before but I really like this Sheriff. He/his department took the time to look into the problem extensively with a common sense approach.


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