Just read Chandler Bing's/Matt Perry's book

[yellowperil]

Don't know how he survived, did ever stupid, wrong thing imaginable. 53 yrs old looks 80 yrs old. Made $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ and threw most away on pills, and doctors.

The book hums along pretty good some funny stuff but,...... sad bigtime.

Owned some Porsches, but mostly crashed them weekly.

[tabs]

Time will tell if he is going to stay straight?

I give him nothing..he has to earn my trust..

He has been paid lots for this book..probably bailed himself out of a deep hole financially.

I have no dog in this hunt..so to me it don't matter which way he falls it is all on him.

[masraum]

Money doesn't make you demon-free. I've heard that most comedians have demons. He was pretty funny in the show. You could see that he had demons if you watched him change over the years on the show.

[tabs]

Originally Posted by masraum

Money doesn't make you demon-free. I've heard that most comedians have demons. He was pretty funny in the show. You could see that he had demons if you watched him change over the years on the show.

Geez that is sumthin I figured out 50 years ago...

Mr Perry and a whole list of other high achievers proves that point...So the question is do the high achievement thing or go for being able to put your head on a pillow at night and have peace of mind...

[masraum]

Originally Posted by tabs

Geez that is sumthin I figured out 50 years ago...

Mr Perry and a whole list of other high achievers proves that point...So the question is do the high achievement thing or go for being able to put your head on a pillow at night and have peace of mind...

You can be high achieving and have money and not have demons. Having money and demons isn't cause and effect. It's a pair of effects that may or may not be related.

[tabs]

Originally Posted by masraum

You can be high achieving and have money and not have demons. Having money and demons isn't cause and effect. It's a pair of effects that may or may not be related.

Mostly true, it comes down to a matter of degree...

Everybody's perceptional lens is biased, where very very few can delineate that in themselves..

From this point on it becomes a spiritual pursuit where more words have been written about it over time than just about anything else. A good place to start would be Jung's "Red Book."

[MikeSid]

I've only seen a few snippets of interviews with him, but my overall impression is that he has not made peace with his condition. He is still very angry and seems to want to blame someone or something. But addiction is like a random birth defect. It sucks, and it's not his fault, but there is no one to blame and blaming won't change the reality he has to deal with. Play the cards you're dealt pal.

Until he gets to the point where he accepts his life as it is, he's not gong to stay sober for long. And I would guess he will bounce in and out of sobriety until he dies. I'm rooting for the guy for no other reason than he made me laugh and he still seems to be hurting. Success was probably the worst thing that could have happened to a guy like that.

[matthewb0051]

Originally Posted by masraum

Money doesn't make you demon-free. I've heard that most comedians have demons. He was pretty funny in the show. You could see that he had demons if you watched him change over the years on the show.

I saw a recent interview with him where he said that he could look at a particular photo/scene from TV and could tell immediately what he was on at the time just looking at the image.

[yellowperil]

Originally Posted by matthewb0051

I saw a recent interview with him where he said that he could look at a particular photo/scene from TV and could tell immediately what he was on at the time just looking at the image.

If he had a goatee it was Vicodin, or any number of other opiate, if he was fat it was booze

He went from 130 lbs to 225 and back on "Friends" and you can see it easily on old replays. Sad

I thought the book would show him quiting for good, but pics of M P today, he hasn't beat it and prob never will.

[pavulon]

People's demons never really leave them. They might be managed better (or worse) at different points in time. The term "dry drunk" exists for good reason. The substance stays in the container but the mentality persists. Worse, few addicts have the self awareness to realize how it plays out in their lives and for the people with whom they interact. It's a big part of the (not new but now encouraged and graded) dysfunction in society. As always, ymmv.

[tabs]

Originally Posted by MikeSid

I've only seen a few snippets of interviews with him, but my overall impression is that he has not made peace with his condition. He is still very angry and seems to want to blame someone or something. But addiction is like a random birth defect. It sucks, and it's not his fault, but there is no one to blame and blaming won't change the reality he has to deal with. Play the cards you're dealt pal.

Until he gets to the point where he accepts his life as it is, he's not gong to stay sober for long. And I would guess he will bounce in and out of sobriety until he dies. I'm rooting for the guy for no other reason than he made me laugh and he still seems to be hurting. Success was probably the worst thing that could have happened to a guy like that.

You can not chose your parents nor the circumstances you are born into...those are the cards you are dealt and can not be changed/ You can come to terms with them and mitigate the damage but they will forever be a limiting factor...that you will have to deal with.

[tabs]

Originally Posted by pavulon

People's demons never really leave them. They might be managed better (or worse) at different points in time. The term "dry drunk" exists for good reason. The substance stays in the container but the mentality persists. Worse, few addicts have the self awareness to realize how it plays out in their lives and for the people with whom they interact. It's a big part of the (not new but now encouraged and graded) dysfunction in society. As always, ymmv.

Not really true..if ya want it bad enough and are willing to pay the price of doing the "work" where ever the truth takes you it can be done.

They found out in the 50's/60's that taking LSD and now Psilocybin under supervision gives one a perceptual perspective where they can see the process or mechanism of their own addiction..and can therefore by understanding it undo the mechanism.. It is like observing yourself as someone else would observe you..

[monoflo]

My brothers been 34 years sober. He was an alky, drug user, --the proto typical Lead Guitarist party animal wanna be rock star.

He would agree -pay the price-do the work --become responsible --only you can change you.

Probably only something like 1/3 of addicts ever completely kick. 1/3 go back and forth -1/3 never change.

He retired at 59 ---5 years ago --Extremely successful.
Dead broke at 34.

[pavulon]

Originally Posted by tabs

Not really true..if ya want it bad enough and are willing to pay the price of doing the "work" where ever the truth takes you it can be done.

So you're saying "the work" ends and that people are cured/fixed/healed...whatever. If so, you're going to have to point to something more substantial than your opinion.

[rcooled]

Originally Posted by pavulon

People's demons never really leave them.

An acquaintance of mine, a former heroin addict, has now been clean for over 25 years. She told me that, even after all this time, hardly a day goes by where she doesn't think about getting high. It's a constant struggle.

[stealthn]

Any inside stuff on the ladies?

[Seahawk]

A friend of mine died last week, the most charismatic human I have ever met in my life. Second place isn't.

We all tried to help. That is all I am going to say other than I loved him, we all did...

[/I]

AIKEN, SC – James “Woody” Woodruff Maloney died February 5, 2023, at the age of 69.

Woody was born October 20, 1953 in Long Island, New York to the late James Woodruff Maloney Sr. and the late Elizabeth Hyland Maloney. Growing up, his family split their time between East Norwich, Long Island, NY and a home on Colleton Ave. in Aiken, SC. His father, James, was a prominent horse trainer who was inducted into the Aiken Thoroughbred Hall of Fame and the National Museum of Racing Hall of Fame in Saratoga Springs, NY. His mother, Lib, was one of the premier show riders during the 1930s and was awarded the Alfred B. MaClay Trophy, at the National Horse Show, in Madison Square Garden in 1934, which was the highest national award for a junior. Woody grew up riding in the Hitchcock Woods and would become a well-known Steeplechase rider. He was involved with the Aiken Steeplechase Association and a keen court tennis player at The Aiken Tennis Club.

[tabs]

On January 28th of this year a woman 69 that I had been going out to dinner with since 2016 died of cancer. I stepped up to the plate and was there for her every step of the way. ...since Nov. I had taken her to the ER 5 times at 2 AM for unbearable pain.each visit lasting 5 to 12 hours in the waiting room where nothing was really accomplished...ya wana talk about what a cluster modern American medicine has become and the suffering you see in the waiting rooms..She knew the cancer had returned and we talked a lot about death and dieing...looking back I talked to her on the phone everyday from Nov on... finally in January I took her to get a PET scan and then went to the MD with her to get the results if it was cancer or not?... I felt the MD was going to tell her that the scan lit up like a Christmas tree and it did, she essentially did to..the cancer was everywhere. The MD said Chemo for life or palliative care. She wasn't going to go through chemo again....her son came down from Sacramento, they did the Will and change in assets, the next day into the hospital and then hospice...10 days after being told she died.

This was my 4th close up and personal rodeo...ya stand up for your friends when the chips are down

Now my other friend 68 in LV has just spent a week in the hospital for back and leg pain where he can't walk..He still doesn't have an answer...maybe back surgery? meanwhile they found a nodule 3cm on one of his Kidneys (they say it is nothing to be concerned about?) and has to go get the Router Rooter job on the Prostrate..

My 3rd friend 60 in LV..has router cuff injury in his left shoulder, has disintegrating disks in his neck. All from working out strenuously and practicing Krav Maga martial arts for decades..he has gone to multiple MD's trying to get a diagnosis where they are bewildered. thinking possibly MS....even getting a referral to the Mayo Clinic who turned him down because they are not accepting new patients...that is #2 for turn downs from the Mayo that I personally know about...

[tabs]

Originally Posted by pavulon

So you're saying "the work" ends and that people are cured/fixed/healed...whatever. If so, you're going to have to point to something more substantial than your opinion.

My opinion is based in scientific fact...they have found that Cognitive Talk Therapy changes the physical configuration of the brain over time..it is called Neural Plasticity..look it up..

"The work" is a term psychologist's use to describe the process of exploring and dealing with your inner self...usually in conjunction with a therapeutic environment.

Most people get into Thearpy because they are in a crisis situation and find that they need some help in dealing with it....Death, illness, divorce change of career etc...this therapy usually lasts anywhere from 6 months to a couple of years...people once they resolve the issue usually leave...Then there are a few people who come back several years later because they want to find out more and are seeking personal growth and or deep seated change...discovering their inner and or true selves.. this process lasts about 7 years...time to make that change in brain configuration.

When you essentially seek growth and or change it is a life long endeavor of continual learning and discovery even after the the therapy has ended, that is the path your are taking.....

The problem becomes how to afford Cognitive Talk Therapy.. it is very costly where insurance companies will not pay for extended therapy.. they instead opt for the palliative symptom reduction route of taking a happy pill that does not solve the underlying issues..and in fact over time changes brain configuration making one dependent on the drugs.. Better living through modern chemistry.

Why not take the edge off of that stress and anxiety you feel after dealing with modern life..just pop that proscribed pill and all your fears and stress will vanish so that you can be happy...

Even the professionals have fallen for that one... for one ..go ask Jordan Peterson about that..

[pavulon]

Originally Posted by rcooled

An acquaintance of mine, a former heroin addict, has now been clean for over 25 years. She told me that, even after all this time, hardly a day goes by where she doesn't think about getting high. It's a constant struggle.

Good for her! It's a remarkable accomplishment and for better or worse she "gets" to do it every day.

Addiction is a weird thing. I think it was a podcast that had an addict relating their story when they said something that really stuck. They said one big aspect of addiction is life becoming "very linear." The only thing that matters is finding the next fix from wake to sleep. They said that, although warped, it was very satisfying to want and to accomplish the most important thing in your life several times a day. I hope recovery is something like that for some people too.