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drag racing the short bus
Join Date: May 2002
Location: Location, Location...
Posts: 21,983
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My brief interaction with a pissed off New York cabbie - in script form...
FADE IN:
INT. NY CAB - North on Broadway - Day The Cab driver is Korean with a thick Korean accent. He's driving the daylights out of his Crown Vic. w/ engine RACING, brakes SQUEALING. Think opening of "RESERVOIR DOGS" or car chase in "TO LIVE AND DIE IN L.A." I'm in back, tossed and tossled, and wishing I had rosary beads... CABBIE (driving agressively): So, where you from? ME (hand gripping armrest): California...L.A. CABBIE (driving agressively): California? HA-HA-HA-HA. You stupid state, that California. HA-HA-HA-HA. What you got as Governor? ME (hand gripping armrest): Schwarzenneger? CABBIE (driving agressively): Yeah! What with that? He actor! Why you elect actor as governor? He boom-boom bad actor! ME (hand really gripping armrest): He was the only choice we had. CABBIE (BRAKING agressively; nearly sideswipes UPS TRUCK): You got BAD choice! Hear me? Bad choice. He ACTOR! Whole world laugh at you. HA-HA-HA-HA! ME (DUCKING down): He'll get rid of the car tax. CABBIE (ACCELERATING TO 70+): Your car tax bad! Your state bad! I got friends in Van Nuys. Van Nuys bad! ME (lurching, feeling life slip away): Van Nuys...not...bad... CABBIE (BRAKING aggressively): All Los Angeles bad! You got bum! You got...who dat guy? Rodney King? You got dat freak...where...Jackson...HA! Look like Joker! You know Joker? ME (in tears): I know the Joker? CABBIE (still aggressive): Who? ME (wishing for "Mommy"): The Joker. I know who the Joker is. CABBIE (swerve, brake, WOT - HARD) And you got bad drivers! Real bad drivers! Not good like here! Good drivers here! I drive here 22 year! ME (in hysterics): Bad drivers? There? CABBIE (PEDAL DOWN HARD: Crown Vic bucking): And bad registration fee. All bad! Here we got bad property tax. I live in Queens! Pay 8 thousand a year! Hate Gulliani! I hate Bloomberg! He no take mayor salary! Who care? Who care? He billionaire, right? I hate Pataki, too! He reason for bad property tax! I pay 8 thousand every year, like I say! ME (gripping myself desperately): We have sunshine! CABBIE (ACCELERATING): HA-HA-HA-HA! ME (looking out back window in shock): That's my stop! CABBIE (STILL ACCELERATING): HA-HA-HA-HA! FADE OUT.
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The Terror of Tiny Town |
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12-02-2003, 10:52 PM
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B58/732
Join Date: Feb 2000
Location: Hot as Hell, AZ
Posts: 12,313
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Back in '99 (or maybe '98?) there was a cabbie strike in NYC. Many residents enjoyed the newfound peace, quiet, and reduced risk to life and limb during that time. I remember Giuliani being quoted as saying, "We've gotten a surprisingly large number of calls saying this was one of the more pleasant days in a long time. If they would like to stay home forever, they can stay home forever."
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ΜΟΛΩΝ ΛΑΒΕ I don't always talk to vegetarians--but when I do, it's with a mouthful of bacon. |
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12-03-2003, 04:26 AM
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Registered
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ROFL...that was a good start to my morning....
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Warren & Ron, may you rest in Peace. |
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12-03-2003, 05:41 AM
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Registered
Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: Linn County, Oregon
Posts: 48,518
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Anybody here had a cab ride in Tokoyo?
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"Now, to put a water-cooled engine in the rear and to have a radiator in the front, that's not very intelligent." -Ferry Porsche (PANO, Oct. '73) (I, Paul D. have loved this quote since 1973. It will remain as long as I post here.) |
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12-03-2003, 08:42 AM
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Registered
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: Illinois
Posts: 356
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Mid 1990's. My wife called & said she was having another miscarriage. I hopped in a cab and told the fellow I had to get to LaGuardia in a hurry. At 110mph, passing a Jetta on the right, I saw a Lazy-Boy reclining chair in the lane in front of us. I thought it was the end.....
Somehow I made the plane and lived to tell about the ride.... NY cabbies are a breed apart.....
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RKC 1987 Guards Red Targa |
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12-03-2003, 08:51 AM
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Super Moderator
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Pwd, I have, but always thought they were decent...
The shop owners were often unpleasant!
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Chris ---------------------------------------------- 1996 993 RS Replica 2023 KTM 890 Adventure R 1971 Norton 750 Commando Alcon Brake Kits |
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12-03-2003, 06:36 PM
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Buy them, sell them
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LOL!
Thanks, David!When I was living in Japan, I took a few rides in Tokyo Cabs and the funny thing is that with all the traffic congestion, nobody gets hot under the collar. But when the road opens up and there's a little room, everybody puts the foot down. 80, 90mph plus! It's insane!  I remember being in the front seat of a friend's 300E doing around 120mph on the highway leading upto Nagano. He was smoking and driving with one hand, passing people without indicating and just chillin' out. I was amazed.
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1931 Oakland Eight Special Saloon 1985 BMW E28 525e (Euro 528e) 1989 911 Carrera Sport 3.2 G50 Cabriolet |
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12-03-2003, 06:58 PM
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B58/732
Join Date: Feb 2000
Location: Hot as Hell, AZ
Posts: 12,313
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A family friend took us around Kyoto and the surrounding environs in his Mitsubish Montero. This fellow was a former MechE for Mitsu specializing in gear design.
I have NEVER met anyone as bad as he was at shifting a manual transmission. CRUNCH! CRUNCH! GRIND!!!! SLAM!!! GRIND!!!! Just thought that was ironic. The doilies in the cabs always make me snicker.
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ΜΟΛΩΝ ΛΑΒΕ I don't always talk to vegetarians--but when I do, it's with a mouthful of bacon. |
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12-03-2003, 08:42 PM
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drag racing the short bus
Join Date: May 2002
Location: Location, Location...
Posts: 21,983
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Yeah? Ever rent an Italian cab driver for the day, in a Fiat four-door no less? We did in Naples. Man! Ferrari is either in the water or the blood with those guys.
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The Terror of Tiny Town |
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12-03-2003, 09:06 PM
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MN
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dd74...that was too funny!!
We heard a lot of the same comments when Jesse Ventura was our Governor.
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87 930 Blk/Blk |
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12-04-2003, 09:34 AM
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Banned
Join Date: Feb 2002
Posts: 6,930
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no doubt
good story !! i once came close to a fist fight with a chicago cabbie but my girl was sober so we left. K |
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12-04-2003, 05:46 PM
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1985 Porsche 911 3.2 (Still in the stable)
1993 BMW 740 IL (Sold)
1985 Mercedes 380 SL (Sold)
1992 Harley Davidson Fatboy (Sold)
1971 Mercedes 280 SL (Currently being restored)
1970 Porsche 911 S 
1976 Porsche 911S - Sold
Rolling Thunder - Sold
'66 Charger - Sold
Beep Beep! - Sold
1989 Porsche 911 Carrera
1987 Porsche 930 3.3
