Pelican Parts
Parts Catalog Accessories Catalog How To Articles Tech Forums
Call Pelican Parts at 888-280-7799
Shopping Cart Cart | Project List | Order Status | Help



Go Back   Pelican Parts Forums > Miscellaneous and Off Topic Forums > Off Topic Discussions


Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Rate Thread
Author
Thread Post New Thread    Reply
B D B D is offline
Registered
 
B D's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2003
Location: Laguna Beach, CA
Posts: 1,405
How to Speak About MEN and WOMEN and Be PC

HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:

1 She is not a "BABE" or a "CHICK" - She is a "BREASTED AMERICAN."

2. She is not a "SCREAMER" or a "MOANER" - She is "VOCALLY APPRECIATIVE."

3. She is not "EASY" - She is "HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE."

4. She is not a "DUMB BLONDE" - She is a "LIGHT-HAIRED DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY."

5. She has not "BEEN AROUND" - She is a "PREVIOUSLY-ENJOYED COMPANION."

6. She is not an "AIRHEAD" - She is "REALITY IMPAIRED."

7. She does not get "DRUNK" or "TIPSY" - She gets "CHEMICALLY INCONVENIENCED."

8. She does not have "BREAST IMPLANTS" - She is "MEDICALLY ENHANCED."

9. She does not "NAG" you - She becomes "VERBALLY REPETITIVE."

10. She is not a "TRAMP" - She is "SEXUALLY EXTROVERTED."

11. She does not have "MAJOR LEAGUE HOOTERS" - She is "PECTORALLY SUPERIOR."

12. She is not a "TWO-BIT HOOKER" - She is a "LOW COST PROVIDER."

HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:

1. He does not have a "BEER GUT" - He has developed a "LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY."

2. He is not a "BAD DANCER" - He is "OVERLY CAUCASIAN."

3. He does not "GET LOST ALL THE TIME" - He "INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS."

4. He is not "BALDING" - He is in "FOLLICLE REGRESSION."

5. He is not a "CRADLE ROBBER" - He prefers "GENERATIONAL DIFFERENTIAL RELATIONSHIPS."

6. He does not get "FALLING-DOWN DRUNK" - He becomes "ACCIDENTALLY HORIZONTAL."

7. He does not act like a "TOTAL ASS" - He develops a case of "RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION."

8. He is not a "MALE CHAUVINIST PIG" - He has "SWINE EMPATHY."

9. He is not afraid of "COMMITMENT" - He is "RELATIONSHIP CHALLENGED."

10. He is not "HORNY" - He is "SEXUALLY FOCUSED."

11. It's not his "CRACK" you see hanging out of his pants - It's "REAR CLEAVAGE."

__________________
68 911L

Last edited by B D; 11-05-2004 at 12:01 PM..
Old 11-05-2004, 11:45 AM
  Pelican Parts Catalog | Tech Articles | Promos & Specials    Reply With Quote #1 (permalink)
Registered
 
bryanthompson's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2003
Posts: 5,058
Garage
Send a message via ICQ to bryanthompson
haha, funny stuff
__________________
1983 944 - Sable Brown Metallic / Saratoga / LSD : IceShark Light Kit
Old 11-05-2004, 12:17 PM
  Pelican Parts Catalog | Tech Articles | Promos & Specials    Reply With Quote #2 (permalink)
Unconstitutional Patriot
 
turbo6bar's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2000
Location: volunteer state
Posts: 5,620
hehe, liquid grain storage system. I gotta get me one of those.
Old 11-05-2004, 02:30 PM
  Pelican Parts Catalog | Tech Articles | Promos & Specials    Reply With Quote #3 (permalink)
Unoffended by naked girls
 
dhoward's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: St. Charles, MO
Posts: 5,894
Garage
Send a message via AIM to dhoward
Got one.
__________________
Dan
1969 911T (sold)
2008 FXDL
www.labreaprecision.com
www.concealedcarrymidwest.com
Old 11-05-2004, 06:04 PM
  Pelican Parts Catalog | Tech Articles | Promos & Specials    Reply With Quote #4 (permalink)
19 years and 17k posts...
 
azasadny's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: Dearborn, MI (Southeast Michigan)
Posts: 17,444
Garage
Very funny! Thanks for sharing it!
__________________
Art Zasadny
1974 Porsche 911 Targa "Helga" (Sold, back home in Germany)
Learning the bass guitar
Driving Ford company cars now...
www.ford.com
Old 11-05-2004, 06:22 PM
  Pelican Parts Catalog | Tech Articles | Promos & Specials    Reply With Quote #5 (permalink)
canna change law physics
 
red-beard's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2000
Location: Houston, Tejas
Posts: 43,366
Garage
"Horizontaly Accessible"

ROFL!

Gotta gets me one of those

__________________
James
The pessimist complains about the wind; the optimist expects it to change; the engineer adjusts the sails.- William Arthur Ward (1921-1994)
Red-beard for President, 2020
Old 11-05-2004, 07:36 PM
  Pelican Parts Catalog | Tech Articles | Promos & Specials    Reply With Quote #6 (permalink)
 
Reply


 


All times are GMT -8. The time now is 05:53 AM.


 
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2025, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.6.0
Copyright 2025 Pelican Parts, LLC - Posts may be archived for display on the Pelican Parts Website -    DMCA Registered Agent Contact Page
 

DTO Garage Plus vBulletin Plugins by Drive Thru Online, Inc.