DADs: what do you think of this?

VaSteve · 03-24-2005, 06:32 PM

I was was previewing day care centers over the past couple of weeks our upcoming baby (our first).

One place had a guy working there with the kids. I guess he was a teacher or something. I couldn't definatevely put an age on the guy. But the kids were like 4-5 at the most.

While I feel that men should be responsible for the upbringing of their kids, and other kids when they get older, Scouts, sports coaches and stuff like that, I have a problem with this for some reason. It just seemed a little wrong to me.

Maybe I watch too much Law and Order or something.

I figure if you're a guy and need a job, there has to be other places for you to work than a day care center.

I wanted to see your thoughts on this.

cantdrv55 · 03-24-2005, 06:43 PM

Was the place a day care center or a day care at someone's house? Either way, a guy taking care of little kids not his own is a little strange. I guess I watch too much Law and Order too. I'd keep looking.

URY914 · URY914's Garage

Did the guy moon walk across the room?

I'd find another.

VaSteve · 03-24-2005, 07:27 PM

This was a large day care, run by a company.

cantdrv55 · 03-24-2005, 07:31 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by VaSteve
This was a large day care, run by a company.

Trust your gut.

lendaddy · 03-24-2005, 07:34 PM

Not a fan of day care period myself. But yea, it's weird to me too.

cstreit · cstreit's Garage

I can't come up with one legitimate reason to worry, but I'd still keep looking. Trust your instincts...

LeeH · 03-24-2005, 08:29 PM

Ask what they require in the form of background checks. If that's satisfactory to you then don't worry about it. Our local YMCA has a couple of young guys who work in the child care center as does our health club.

Now if they host a sleepover... that's another story.

Moses · 03-24-2005, 08:43 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by cstreit
I can't come up with one legitimate reason to worry, but I'd still keep looking. Trust your instincts...

Me too.

dd74 · 03-24-2005, 08:54 PM

What's strange about it? Or are all you guys mama's boys?

Moneyguy1 · 03-24-2005, 09:52 PM

For years, I watched the little ones during mass at our local church on Sunday so the parents could worship uninterrupted. The remark that started this sounds a bit like "Men hunt and gather....Women stay home and make babies", as if men cannot also supply nuturing.

A new age.

VaSteve · 03-25-2005, 04:22 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Moneyguy1
The remark that started this sounds a bit like "Men hunt and gather....Women stay home and make babies", as if men cannot also supply nuturing.

A new age.

I agree, and it was my remark. I consider myself to be somewhat open minded, but for some reason this bugs me. I brought it up at the lamazz class last night and others thought it was a bit weird. So I guess I'm not too far off base.

Not like where I live has a lack of "men" jobs.

Groesbeck Hurricane · 03-25-2005, 04:41 AM

Trust your gut. If it felt wrong, it might be.

That said, there is nothing wrong with a man taking care of children in child care. He might really enjoy it and do a fine job which is what the children need. I'd rather that than a sour woman any day. The kids would be more pleasant to take home if they started happy!!!!

stomachmonkey · 03-25-2005, 05:06 AM

But male teachers are OK, even in Kindergarten?

SLO-BOB · 03-25-2005, 06:02 AM

Teachers are different than baby-sitters. I feel that this should not matter, but to me, it does.

I'm with you-move on.

David · David's Garage

I worked as a handyman for a daycare company back in college. I never allowed the kids to be around me if there wasn't a teacher in the room. Not that I would do anything, but I didn't think it was proper. I guess we do have double standards on some things.

bryanthompson · bryanthompson's Garage

Every other potential daycare customer (people just like you) probably have had the same feelings that you're having. If he's still in business, he's probably alright, becuase you know those parents are questioning their kids on what goes on there.

i remember when I was in daycare sometimes the husband would take over if she had to leave. I remember he was always the coolest, and I learned a lot from him.

RickM · RickM's Garage

Yeah, it's kind of ashamed that as an adult male you have to be paranoid when a kid might say hello at a store, restaraunt or elsewhere. I love kids but It's understandable that parents are suspicious with a stranger....hell I'm very protective with my daughter.

In any case, is the daycare teacher ever alone with the kids? Are there other adults around when he's with the kids? Background check research is also a great idea. Ask for a summary and research the service they use to run the check.

For the most part I agree with the "follow your instint" advice.

911boost · 911boost's Garage

Steve,

I have a 2 year old, we did a lot of research before choosing a daycare for our daughter. Being a stay at home mom was not an option for my wife, as she really enjoys her career.

I chose a very reputable place in town. After about a year, a male "teacher or whatever" was in my daughters Wobbler Room. I had the same concerns as you, so I talked to the owner, who stated he was a student at Colorado State University in some sort of Child Psychology undergrad program. I listened to what she (the owner) had to say, then I took some time to talk to guy myself. After speaking with him, I had no problem. He was there for as long as he needed to be for school and then moved on.

In a situation like this, you do need to trust your gut like others have said, but you also need to realize that it may be a situation like I mentioned above.

On a side note, I think I might actually go insane if I worked somewhere like a daycare, no seriously insane. I love my daughter, and the terribole 2's are one thing, since she is my daughter, but 4 or 5 other 2 year olds, no way, no how.

Bill

911S Targa · 911S Targa's Garage

Let me throw a wrench into this.

While both my wife and I have careers, we have to use the day care system. I can tell you, no matter how much research you do, and no matter how deep a back ground check can be, you still run the risk of a situation. I had one with a very VERY good daycare. Yes, they had around 5 males working there. They were all great with the kids no problems. Except for one.He was arrested on 30 counts of child porn, production of child porn, touching, and sexual something. Itdidnt accure at the daycare, but around his house. Some bum was going through the neiboorhood trash, and found polaroids of him, with a couple of nieghborhood kids.,..,.., you get the picture. And this daycare has the highest standard of background checks, and he didnt come up with anything that would have shown he was a threat.

I think my point here is this, I dont knock the daycare system.,.,.,just like anything else, it`s far from perfect , but there are good daycares out there, with really REALLY great people. I would just look deeply into it. I would talk with owners, other parents etc.