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The Cuddly One
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: Milan, Italy
Posts: 1,515
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Why
I've just translated these into Italian for my daughter, thought they were fun:
Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are flat? Why do banks charge a fee on 'insufficient funds' when they know there is not enough? Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet? Why doesn't glue stick to the bottle? Why do they use sterilised needles for death by lethal injection? Why doesn' t Tarzan have a beard? Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him? Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets? Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word lisp? What is the speed of darkness? Are there specially reserved parking spaces for " non-special" people at the special olympics? If you send someone 'Styrofoam', how do you pack it? If the temperature is zero outside today and it's going to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold will it be? If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes? If it's true that we are here to help others, what are the others doing here? Do married people live longer than single ones or does it only seem longer? If someone with a split personality threatens to commit suicide, is it a hostage situation Can you cry under water? What level of importance must a person have before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered? If money doesnt grow on trees then why do banks have branches? Why does a round pizza come in a square box? How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on bigger suitcases ? Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up every two hours? If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing? Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground? Why do doctors, when they ask you to strip, leave the room or close the cubicle curtain while you change? ..... They' re still going to see you naked anyway
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-Isa 911E 3.0 (Tristezza, the Rattus Maximus) and Jimmy the Mini lll Dum vivimus, vivamus! Man braucht nicht reparieren was funktioniert! |
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04-18-2005, 03:14 AM
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Non Compos Mentis
Join Date: May 2001
Location: Off the grid- Almost
Posts: 10,598
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Dang! Now my head is going to hurt trying to figure it all out!
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04-18-2005, 12:47 PM
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My favorite:
If it's true that we are here to help others, what are the others doing here?
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1983 944 - Sable Brown Metallic / Saratoga / LSD : IceShark Light Kit |
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04-18-2005, 12:51 PM
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Friend of Warren
Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: Lincoln, NE
Posts: 16,496
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Isa, do you have the day off today? Lots of posts from you!
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Kurt V No more Porsches, but a revolving number of motorcycles. |
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04-18-2005, 12:59 PM
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Quote:
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04-18-2005, 01:25 PM
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Thank you Isa - loved them.
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Modes of Transportation: 1984 Porsche 911 Targa 2003 VW Jetta GLI |
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04-18-2005, 02:36 PM
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1983 Porsche 944 2.5 NA
1979 Porsche 911SC 3.0
1984 Porsche 911 Carrera Targa 3.2 L
