Prehaps the Grossest Thing Yet My Son Has Done...What Have Yours Done?

[M.D. Holloway]

OK - Kids have a pretty high thershold for grossness and ours tip the charts. If you have a weak stomach, you may not want to read this thread.

The other night we went out to dinner at our fav Italian joint - Bari's. Max, our 6 yr old is basically a vegan by choice. He is very healthy and never sick, a little larger than kids his age so we really are not concerned that the only tjink he will eat when we go out is salads and bread. His 2.5 yr old sister Emma will eat anything.

We get the dinner rolls and Max and Emmy dive in. These kids can eat a loaf of bread if given the opportunity. Lisa and I engage in a converastion. I happen to notice that my wife has stopped talking is is now watching him. I turn to find him chewing the bread into a mush and spitting it into another piece of bread. We stare in amazement. He puts another peice on top and proceeds to eat it. He sees us looking at him and says "What? Its a spit snadwich! Its good!"

Now mind you, my wife (an Iowa farm girl) can deliver a calf with one hand while eating a snickers bar with the other, steps on wolf spiders in bare feet and has on more than one occasion picked up baby poop out of the tub with her bare hands and thought nothing of it does not get squeemish over anything. "Mike, I think I'm gonna be sick..."

"I wanna bite!" Emma crys out. I don't think so Emmy. Max, back away from the sandwich...

Whats the grossest thing your kid has done?

[BlueSkyJaunte]

I laughed my ass off, read this to my wife, who responded:

"We're gonna have NORMAL kids, dammit!!!!"

[nostatic]

don't tell her...but that *is* normal for a kid

well, a boy anyway

[Brother]

I can top that.

I came home one day to house with some bed sheets on the front lawn. My son's window was open.

I went inside and my wife just told me to go look and that the rest was mine to clean.

Upstairs I went and into my son's room.

All I can say is "Fecal Artistry".

[Nader]

I want to throw up everytime I recall this story. It's so gross, it can't be true, and I half expect someone to find this story on the Snopes site. Here goes:

A distant relative of a friend of a friend of mine was out camping with her family, including a small child. I guess there was a stray dog roaming around the campsite which attracted the child's attention. She followed it out behind some bushes and returned several minutes later, smiling, with blood surrounding her mouth, and dripping down her chin. Horrified, her mother asked her where she was, what happened, fearful that her child was attacked in the face by the dog. The child replied that she was eating grapes. Grapes? from where? (a pause) From the doggie. They rounded up the dog, and found that it was infested with swollen, big, round, blood-engorged ticks!

Oh god. I get shaky just typing this story.

[Drago]

Thanks Nader, I just got to re-taste the Eggs Beeny I had for brunch...

[HardDrive]

Originally posted by BlueSkyJaunte
I laughed my ass off, read this to my wife, who responded:

"We're gonna have NORMAL kids, dammit!!!!"

And now the bad news....its all normal.

Nothing to report here other than the standard puking/pooping antics.