Are You Really Happy ?
 

Philosophy Corner:

I am healthy. I have four wonderful kids and a beautiful spouse. Rich, close relations with my parents and brothers. Pretty fantastic medical career so far. Medical patent holder with a load of money expected to pour in soon. Author of medical books for parents. Driving a legend.

Obviously fertile and not to harsh on the eyes, according to women.

All this and just turning forty (next week).

But am I happy ?

No. Something is missing. Been missing for as long as I can remember.

If the above is a serious question & not a movie quote...
Are you doing what you really want to do with your life?

Trade ya.

You're not supposed to be happy. You're supposed to pursue happiness. If you're happy for more than a week at a time, look around -- you may be in the afterlife :)

Re: Are You Really Happy ?
 

A Goomah?

Re: Are You Really Happy ?
 

Take a few days off by yourself, go someplace you like that is quiet. Take a good book and nothing strong to drink.

Sit down and look at the good parts of your life, then the parts that you would change. Make a list of both. Then ask yourself what you are missing and what you would change if you could. Think about it for a while and do not feel afraid to change the lists when and where needed.

You cannot do this at home, nor with the wife and kids around. After you get away from things life usually becomes a bit more clearer. After you have identified what you feel the issue is, then you can work towards changing it.

JoeA

Have no regrets... That's a rule I always tried to live by... it worked so far for me....
And remember... you are not defined by what life throws at you, but by how you react to that...

Do you like working in the medical field?

My life sucks by some peoples standards, my job pays in the low forties, I'm in my late forties and live alone.

But I have a fun job and good friends so I am relatively happy.

If you could chuck it all and start fresh, no matter the risks or repercutions, what would you do?

EDIT: What are you truly thankful for?

How much time do you actually get to yourself?

I agree with Joe, get away from it all for a couple of days and get a better perspective.

Yes.

Re: Are You Really Happy ?
 

We all take stock of our lives at certain milestones. Happiness is a journey, not a destination.

life has to many ups and downs for me to make a decision right away. i'll check back in right before death.

The potential for happiness is biologically determined to some degree.

I've known people whose lives were an uninterrupted stream of pain and heartbreak, but they have a spirit that is unwavering. Yes, they are happy. I've also known people whose lives are defined by staggering success and accomplishment, yet they are clinically depressed.

Paraphrasing Freud, to be happy you need something to love, something to do and something to hope for. Maybe something is missing. I've never known anyone who was truly happy serving only themselves in life. If you are spending all your time doing medical research and writing, maybe it's time to return to the bedside for a while. It's exhausting, but rewarding.

Just keep it at or below the speed limit when you do get away.

Do what you want before you die

OR

Die doing what you want

But for God's sake don't spend the rest of your life traveling down the center of the road.

the posessions and family are great, the money must be adequate, but are you free to do as you want?

I've always defined happy as not needing to answer to anyone. You can do as you please, how you please, when you please. No boss, no liabilities..

that would be heaven. I'd be a beggar but I like cars too much. Can't afford a car on a bum's pay.

rjp

I've always felt you need something truly enrichening and enlightening in your life, something meaningful that's both fun and rewarding. I've always assumed children filled that role for most people (don't know myself, the first isn't due until summer) but I don't think they fulfill that need for everyone. For me it's always been music, throughout my life. (my non-paying "night" job is a composer) It fills a creative drive in me that nothing else possible could. Not to diminish the importance of family, but it's a completely different thing.

One thing I do know is money and Porsches won't fill that need, guaranteed. They're icing (and pretty damn tasty and good-looking icing) but you still need the cake.

I remember reading a "dear abby" or "ann landers" once about a guy who was pulling in 6 figures, had a good job and good family, but was working 50 hrs/week and was always stressed. He quit that job and took a job making 40k a year working 35 hours a week and had time to himself and time with his family. He said he had never been happier. Of course, at the time I was working 60-70 hours a week making 25k a year, so I was thinking that he could stick it up his @$$. :D

Money is good, but time to enjoy life is important whether it's time for you, for your family, or a good balance of both. Maybe a hobby that you love.

Is it that you don't have any friends Markus? Just kidding...

Sorry to hear that something's not right. It makes it more difficult if you can't identify that thing which is missing. What are you longing for, and what can you do to get it into your life?

I also agree that constant happiness may be a difficult state to achieve. The nature of the human condition is to constantly strive for more. We become dissatisfied after a certain period of status quo, and start looking for something else. Perhaps simple contentedness is more realistic?

ianc