Child support question

[Joeaksa]

A close friend of mine just went through this. After all he had been through he decided to do nothing as the legal costs were not worth the hassle.

The amount of money we all have spent on divorce lawyers could buy many of us a 917...

[Joeaksa]

If no legal representatives are required, I would go for it as well. I have a second friend who has wasted his life over this type of situation.

Got married years ago, had a son and after 8 years they split. Nasty split BTW. All was well for the first couple of years then she cut off any visitation for my friend, and the court, while not agreeing, did not force the issue. My friend said "to hell with you, if I cannot see my son, all payments stop" and he stopped paying. They went after him and he stopped working, sold everything and now lives undercover with little or no reportable income. He has gone to the point of declaring bankruptcy and since its a federal condition, the state people cannot touch him until its over.

Personally I feel he has wasted his life just to get back at her, but part of what he is doing is correct. She is breaking the law by not allowing him to see his child, and the court could care less. On the otherhand they want their (her) money every month no matter what.

Tough situation and hope that it works out for you and your kids.

JoeA

[Moses]

Originally posted by Joeaksa
...part of what he is doing is correct. JoeA

Sorry, but I disagree. Paternity is an irrevocable responsibility. IRREVOCABLE. It does not matter one bit how nasty the ex is. In a bitter divorce, there is only one party who is faultless, the child. There are no circumstances under which a man can morally withhold child support.

[id10t]

My sister in laws husband has gotten the shaft over child suppor,t but it is his own fault for not growing a pair or hiring a lawyer. His ex did nothign about child support since she made about 3x what he did until he got remarried. Then slapped him with it big time, including *back* pay. Then every 2 months, she'd file papers to raise the amount. Meanwhile, he lost his job and had to start working minimum wage stuff, he can't support his wife and their baby, and it got to where my SILs check was being deducted from as well. Very vengful (and in my opinion wrong) of the ex, but still a lot of his fault for not doing anything but showing up and saying "yes your honor".

[id10t]

Even when the parent who has the kid is making more than enough and there are no financial hardships whatsoever? How about in that situation, adn the non custodial parent has absolutely nothing?

I agree that a PARENT (not just man) should do everything they can to support their child, but I also realise that that isn't possible in every situation. However, a parent who isn't able to support should be doing *everything* they possibly can to get into a position where they can support.

Originally posted by Moses
There are no circumstances under which a man can morally withhold child support.

[Blanco]

I'm glad the politicos in GA are finally addressing this situation. Where-as before they used to rely soley on the Non-Custodial parent income to assess child support, they are now going to include both parents income.

Folks in GA can read more here.... http://www.gachildsupport.org/

1) Georgia's guidelines were originally intended for Title IV-D welfare recipients, not for middle or high income families.

2) Ga Code 19-6-15 applies in situations where the father or non-custodial parent is absent from the child's life and is the sole income provider to the custodial parent, normally the mother.

3) There are 18 factors in the current law that can be considered when determining child support. Normally, they are not considered since it is easier to simply apply a percentage against one person's gross income.

4) Both parties are to provide financial information, however child support is calculated against the non-custodial parent's income only.

5) Mandatory taxes are not considered.....percentages are applied against GROSS not net, which can cause your child support to be more than 40% of your take-home pay. Don't even think about saving for retirement! The custodial parent pays expenses from their net pay, but not a non-custodial.

6) Visitation time is not considered even if you are paying for child care, food, maintaining a room for the child. Even if you spend 50% of the year with your children...

7) Overtime, commissions, bonuses are used to calculate child support even though this is a not a 'guaranteed' source of income. Even if you won an award in a photo contest, this can be viewed by a Judge as 'you did it once, you can do it again...'.

8) You can be forced to pay for add-ons..anything over and above standard costs for raising a child. You could be sent to jail because you could not afford braces or soccer dues.

9) Our current guideline is NOT based on economic factors. The more money you earn, the more it costs to raise your child...according to our current law anyways. Economics state that the costs of raising a child remain the same regardless of the incomes of the parents. Georgia believes that a box of cereal costs more if you earn more.

10) Georgia's law remains the same as it did in 1989 even though Federal mandates requires states to revise their guidelines based on case studies and economic conditions/factors.

11) Georgia's law was based on tax law of 1982 in which a non-custodial parent could claim the child if they were providing more than half of their support....the tax law has changed since then....A custodial parent now receives the tax benefit and child support...tax FREE!

12) There isn't a ceiling on child support.

13) If you have children from a prior marriage/relationship or even a current one, these children will suffer. They are not included when awards are calculated even if they require special medical care etc. Judges and feminist groups claim that if you can't afford your first kids, then you shouldn't have anymore.....yet a mother is rewarded for having multiple children by multiple fathers by our government and court systems.

14) Extra money spent on your children is considered a 'gift' and is not applied towards child support. Also known as 'in-kind contributions'.

15) If you lose your job due to no control of your own, you cannot ask for a modification of child support, unless it has been two years since your last modification.

16) Child support can be based on what the Judge thinks you can make..not on what you actually earn. Also called, 'imputing'.

17) Yes, your current husband/wife's income and assets CAN be garnished to satisfy arrearages even though they are not legally obligated to support those children! File taxes and bank separately if you are in any kind of committed (legal or non-legal) relationship.

18) Private collection agencies are hired by the state to collect child support. These companys are not regulated and are being paid to operate by the state...shouldn't the state spend that money on other programs? If child support were affordable, there wouldn't be much need for these private collection agencies. FYI: If you pay to any of these agencies (Family Support Registry, Maximus etc) you need to keep a close eye on all payments even if they are garnishments. This does not mean that the money ever made it to the other parent....you could end up back in court on contempt even though you have been paying all along. The records from these agencies will be used as evidence and remember, they are not regulated and their records are NOT accurate.

19) Georgia says that it's 'okay' if you are completely absent from a child's life, as long as you are sending a check each month. When it the last time you heard of someone being jailed because they never exercised their visitation?

20) If you have a professional license, you are punished more severely than someone who just has a driver's license. Even if both payers owe the same amount of child support, one of you is going to lose your ability to work and earn money while one is only going to lose their ability to drive.

21) Paragraph XXIII of the Georgia Constitution states, ' There shall be no imprisonment for debt'. The United States did away with Debtor's Prison hundreds of years ago..why are parents being jailed for child support arrearages?

22) Again, back to the 18 factors used to deviate. Even if a Judge uses one of these factors, there are no instructions on how to calculate the support amount based on the deviation.

23) Child support was designed to recover welfare payments made to mothers because of the father's absence. Have you ever heard of welfare being $1500/month? When this amount is unaffordable, it sends a father to jail and the mother on welfare....taxpayers lose this battle.

24) There is a federal incentive to set high child support payments. The higher they are, the more the state collects. Then the federal government will match 6 cents per dollar to help fund enforcement programs. The state, in turn, uses this money for Maximus and other agencies....unfair child support guidelines are great for Georgia's economy!

25) You can't get a second job to help with child support, because this too, can be included as your income, even though you took the second job to help 'make ends meet'.

26) A basic self-support reserve dollar amount is overlooked in calculated child support. You could be left with little or nothing to live on.

27) Georgia is(WAS) 1 out of 3 states that uses these kinds of misguided calculations.

28) Wisconsin is going to change their guidelines since they have admitted that their guidelines do not work....

We are based on Wisconsin's guidelines.

29) Tennessee has changed from a % of obligor model to an income shares. This was enacted, not by the legislative body, but by the Governor. Soon, Georgia will be one of the last states to use a % of obligor!

30) It should not be the "trier of fact's" burden to show that deviations are necesary. If you do not understand the guidelines, you would not ask this..therefore it would be up to your attorney (if you can afford one). If they don't ask, then your out of luck.

31) Georgia law is designed to invite, rather than minimize, further litigation over support awards. If our lawmakers truly cared about our families, they would adopt an economical, accurate law that would keep our money out of the courtrooms in our childrens' bank accounts!!!

32) If you have made it this far, write your legislator and ask them to continue to adopt fair laws for our families and children.

[Flatbutt1]

Originally posted by procon
Recently received a "Notice of Impending Review" regarding my support payment, which will go up.
However, I'm seeking a reduction of two months support based on the fact that my son resides with me a minimum of that during the Summer.

Anyone had success in such matters?

Well I went thru that back in the 80's and had some success. I had my support cut in half during the summer when the kids were with me. I had to demonstrate that I needed the additional money to provide for the kids while she needed less. I still had to pay her enough to maintain her household though. But yeah you should be able to do this. Just stress the need to provide for the kids, not to make life easier for you.

[Tobra]

I had them do a "retroactive change on the amount I was to pay each month. They notified me two months after she turned 18, and said I owed them $7000 and change for under paying for the last year and a half. I could have gone to court and hammered the ex for half the tuition at the private high schools that I paid and ended up with her owing me money, but had a second thought, "Wait a minute, this would be a waste of my valuable time, I will just go earn some $$. The poor HS dropout at the courthouse could not figure it out when I went in a paid the dough. She looked it up, said, "I don't understand, you have not missed a payment in...ever"

I did not care so much about her not spending the support payments on the kids, but it cheesed me off that she lied to the kids about me for their entire lives, and did all that she could to destroy any possibility that I have any relationship with them. It hurts me, but I understand she is a stinking whore, tough for a kid to wrap their heads around something like that, so I never told them. I talked to them about it a little, but they are completely brainwashed, shame really, I am absolutely certain it hurt the kids more than me.

[Flatbutt1]

Originally posted by procon
Damn
The "only" thing my ex & I were able agree upon outside of court was no matter what, our son wouldn't be a used as leverage.

Yeah well I hope she meant it. People(men &women) WILL forget that they said that and will think keeping the kid away from you is best for the kid IF you piss 'em off enough. Like, oh . . .maybe dating a much younger woman. DAMHIK

[Jims5543]

Originally posted by Moses
Sorry, but I disagree. Paternity is an irrevocable responsibility. IRREVOCABLE. It does not matter one bit how nasty the ex is. In a bitter divorce, there is only one party who is faultless, the child. There are no circumstances under which a man can morally withhold child support.

Tell that to my brother in law. He has spent 2 years in prison because of the ex. He decided after the last 18 month stint that he was better off not having any contact with the ex at all, that included giving up his contact with his daughter.

The big picture? The ex is married to a millionair and drives around in a brand new 5 series while the new hubbe drives an M3. The y live in a McMansion and own 2 flooring stores in very wealthy areas. They also inherited 18 acres on the intercoastal waterway.

She MAKES him pay the $600 a month child support every month even though it is totally not needed. It is his punishment.

He now looses every tax return as he pays off the back support payments he owes from being in jail and not being able to pay. He was once arrested for not paying weeks after getting out of jail for false charges he assaulted her when she attacked his new girlfriend.

After his 6 month stint in jail he was arrested for not paying his support for 6 months. Away he went for 18 more months.

I am his boss. I have to mail off his payments. One of them got to the state at the 32 day mark. (it was how the month and my payroll fell) This is illegal. one has to be there every 30 days or less. His license was suspended and a warrant was issued for his arrest.

It seems the ex's mother works for the court system. Guess who gets screwed at every turn.

He finally gets to see his little girl because she was diagnosed with diabetes. The ex had to contact him for medical history and he asked if he could see his girl and she agreed much to the shock of all of us.

My heart goes out to you guys that have to endure this BS.

[real550A]

Like, oh . . .maybe dating a much younger woman.

Wait one minute! You mean there's something wrong with that too? Who'd have known?