My recent alleged violations:

-Referring to clothes as an "outfit";
-Saying "swatches" instead of samples;
-My Jetta.

it's the name. just like looking an older, gray-haired bartender straight in the eye and saying 'gimmie a screaming orgasm'. just not happenin'. i just don't like quiche b/c it's a weird combo. put 'em all separate on the same plate, much better...

+2 on the astroglide vs. ky

as for the small dogs, what are you gonna do when they are a package that comes complete w/ their 'owners'?
ie: http://img411.imageshack.us/img411/7800/gbvwr2.th.jpg

a man should never ever wax eyebrows, unless you only have one big one in the middle.

You should expand that to: A man should never wax anything.

True 'dat. Shaving, burning off (either chemical or fire) or ripping out only acceptable methods. Wimps.

If a dog does not come up to your knees, its not a dog, its a football.

Steve, I tend to agree except.... I just turned 52 and the plumbing is starting to not cooperate!...fortunately only in "elimination mode". Plumbing still has a heightned sense of um...er..."patriotism" and can "fly the flag" without a problem!:D

Ordinarily, I'd rip out balky plumbing with a Sawzall and throw in some new copper.....but I'm not THAT much a man!:eek: :D

I dated a woman who works in a Urologist's office. She reports some sad cases where a guy spends his whole life disciplining his bladder, only to discover that there's damage and it's permanent. The bladder becomes rather large and its capacity is high, but unfortunately it becomes impossible to fully evacuate it.

Oh and I have a quiche recipe that you guys would respect. Just barely enough eggs to qualify as a quiche. Mostly, it's a meat and cheese pie. It's thick and heavy and juicy. The egg kinda combines with the cheese. It has olives and a few other decorations, but mostly meat and cheese.

Post it! Sounds great.

:rolleyes: :rolleyes: When my "Man-Card" thread devolves into guys giving each other friggin recipes for Pete's sake, "YA THINK we've lost the spirit of it or what?:rolleyes: :rolleyes:

Move over ladies. Someone post a picture of a naked lady or something. I could feel my sack shriveling as I read that.

Good one.

Wife make you post that?

I'm out of high school and am sure as hell not married. You see, in college, there are plenty of young women around willing to do laundry, cook, and clean. All it takes is a little talk, and some good sex:) Case in point: I'm messing around with this girl. I was shooting pool one day, and she walked, and I mentioned it'd be great if she'd do my laundry. Two hours later, I'm done shooting pool and my laundry is done, my desk cleaned, and my bed made. Hell yes.

And, searing meat with fire is grilling, which is a manly domain. Grilling is allowed. Prancing around the kitchen, is a violation. Glad we got that worked out.

Ok, here's the bottom line on cooking. Cooking <I>is</I> manly. Baking on the other hand is <i>not</I>. Quiches are baked. End of story.

See what I mean? Once this thread went to recipe exchanging and talk of cooking and cleaning the thread ground to a halt!

Okay, here's controversial one.......baby talking to your dog! No, not the usual, "Does Poochie Boy want a treat, huh? You want a treat, boy?"

More the, "Does snookum ookums want a treatsy weatsy" type.

God, when we inherited our cat (is that a violation right there?), she was so shy that I had to talk like that inside my own house, lest I scare her under a piece of furniture with my voice. Freakin' ridiculous. Fortunately, as the cat got to know us I was able to talk like a normal, ahem, manly man again.

How about riding a scooter? And not as a pit bike or in some island paradise where that's all you can rent.

Baby talk PERIOD. God, it's annoying. Even from women. Even from women to infants. I'm sure when I was a baby I got annoyed by it. :p

Nah, cats are cool. They're viscious killers (don't believe me? Get a mouse and let it loose in a room with one). Although if you doll up your cat with cutsey frilly collars and stuff, that's an infraction. Just keeping cats is okay, 'specially if they're to kill mice.

You get bonus points if you reward the cats for dropping dead mice at your feet. You get even more bonus points if you eat 'em.

I have a manly cat.

When my in-laws brought their Maltese, he had the dog (which is twice his size) on its back and was going for the throat in seconds.

I had some work done on my house this summer. One of the crew asked to use my bathroom. He was back outside in seconds: "Your cat doesn't like me." I escorted him back inside, and the cat ran to him, growled, and took a flying lunge with claws extended.

This is the only cat that's manly enough to own.

http://whatjeffkilled.com/