Women and Shopping.

[stomachmonkey]

So I say to my wife the other day, "Hey, if your'e out at the mall or something do me a favor and pick up a couple of pairs of jeans for me"

She: What kind?

Me: Don't care, regular jeans.

She: What color?

Me: Blue, i just need a couple of pairs of normal blue jeans.

Couple days later she calls me from the store, "they don't have in your size but they have this and that and yada yada"

Me: No thanks, just want blue jeans,

Today I come home and she bought me 4 pairs of pants to try.

Me: those aren't jeans

She: no but they are "jean like, they're light and will be good for FL......"

Me: They are not blue

She: just try them on

Me: no! I wanted, 1) blue, 2) jeans

She: but they're nice, you can wear them to go out for a casual evening........

Me: I have plenty of dress slacks, if I want to dress up I'll wear the ones that I have, if I want to wear jeans I'll wear jeans. I have no interest in casual dress pants that are like jeans but are not jeans. and did I mention, they are not blue. why did you buy them if they are not what I needed?

She: Because they did not have jeans for you.

Me: So the store does not have what I need and instead of walking out empty handed you buy me 4 pairs of pants that I don't need and that I don't want?

Someone explain this to me.

[dd74]

Originally posted by stomachmonkey

Someone explain this to me.

No. You'll understand soon enough when she leaves for Fl. without you.

[Joeaksa]

You cannot explain women.... either live with them or sometimes its a LOT better time living without them.

[widgeon13]

and I thought I was the only one.

[MFAFF]

Never send a woman to do a man's job....

Simple instructions are never simple enough...

[nostatic]

just take the valium. Cheaper than a divorce...

[arcsine]

analogies like this switchbox are not simply humorous

[}{arlequin]

hope you learned your lesson
next time you're ordering something from pelican, just don't forget to click on the 'jeans' icon as well

[imcarthur]

Haha. Same here. Usually.

Except I went to a dept store in the local mall for jeans 3 weeks ago. Blue jeans. Levis. Simple. So I bought 3 pairs of the right size & the right variation (I thought). On sale too. I didn't try them on - of course.

Except they have a frigging button fly.

Now, they are in my wife's trunk on their way back to the store.

And I still don't have new jeans.

Ian

[scottmandue]

Originally posted by stomachmonkey

Someone explain this to me.

The air speed velocity of a swallow -
w*c-ln(s)

w=weight of the coconut in slugs
c=# of coconuts is units
s=head wind in mph

[nostatic]

african or european?

[HardDrive]

Originally posted by scottmandue
The air speed velocity of a swallow -
w*c-ln(s)

w=weight of the coconut in slugs
c=# of coconuts is units
s=head wind in mph

Rubbish. Only an African swallow could generate those air speeds, and this is a temperate zone.

[Superman]

I used to sell shoes. Commonly, a gang of women or at least a pair would come in. Shopping is apparently dangerous, as they rarely do this alone. Perhaps the woman is looking for a shoe that will be impossible to find. Let's say it's a mustard-colored ankle-strap thing with a wide, flared heel that's 1.5" high. Let's further say that I show her a shoe that EXACTLY fits that description, in her size. She tries it on and goes to the mirror. Shoe shopping cannot be done without mirrors. I ask her how they feel. She hesitates as though this question is quite a surprise, and says they feel fine. That's not relevent, she's thinking. Okay, so here is the perfect shoe. The one that would be impossible to find, except that here it is. She'll have objections. I remain mostly quiet, as much as practicable. Disappointed that I am virtually cheating her out of a shopping experience by finding the right shoe so quickly, she asks if I can hold them while she continues shopping. I put her name on them and go splash water on my face in case I'm dreaming. Nope. Not a dream.

A man walks in. Points at his feet and asks "You got these in a ten-and-a-half?" I recall getting a call from a man an hour ago, inquiring as to whether we have this shoe. I go get his size. He tries them on and of course, they fit. He's been wearing them for twenty years. He asks me to put his old ones in the box so he can begin breaking in the new ones now. He asks what other colors I have. At the checkout counter he either pulls out a wad of cash.....or a credit card. Four pair at $160 per pair. He says he is weary of this ordeal and prefers to try the rest on at home. I'm never going to see those shoes again.

Six hours later, the lady is back to look at the mustard shoe again. Forty minutes later, she want me to hold them some more.

[Jeff Higgins]

A man will spend $10 on a $5 item he really needs.

A woman will spend $5 on a $10 item that she doesn't need, for no other reason than "it was on sale".

My wife used to come home with a *****load of useless stuff from Nordstroms or wherever and try to explain "how much money" she "saved". I would counter with "I'm going to the (fill in the blank; 'gun store', 'Harley shop', etc.) to 'save' some money, too..."

[cmccuist]

I told my wife that I like plain, white, cotton pillow cases that open at one end. No multiple colors with lepord print and tassles that leave a bizzare imprint in your face when you wake up. I just want that cool feeling of a clean white pillow case when my melon hits the pillow. Is that so wrong??

I might as well have asked her to split the atom. She couldn't figure out why anyone wouldn't want a complicated pillow case that matched the drapes or the wall paper or whatever hell else she decorated the bedroom with.

[jorian]

[Jims5543]

I needed a coupl eof pairs of cargo shorts for knocking around and work.

I drove to the mall. Walked into American Eagle, picked out 3 different styls of shorts in about 5 minutes. Went to dressing room tried all 3 on in about 2 minutes, decided on the cut/style I liked.

I kept the one I tried on that I liked and got a 2nd pair of the same style in another color.

Back in car driving home about 15 minutes later.

Next time go buy the jeans yourself. It will save you tons of money and lots of time.

[Groesbeck Hurricane]

I think your wife just taught you a valuable lesson. Learn it. Do your own d*@& shopping! :-)

[scottmandue]

Me on phone with lady at 11:30 AM Sunday: "So I get out of church at ten, run by home depot and grab a new grill and wire brush for the BBQ, hit trader Joe's for a few things, then hit the supermarket for beer, chips, and dip."
Her: "So you bought everything for a BBQ in ninety minutes!?!"

[Porsche]

This is why men are the "hunters". We go for the kill.